Anatomy of a Photo: Rule #47
André Leducq was a complete French Badass, with a capital B. He was third, below Merckx and Hinault for Tour de France stage wins. Nicolas Frantz was an equally Badass Luxembourger. He rode to more victories than Frandy Schleck shall ever attain in a few lifetimes. He did win the Tour de France.
The crowd is obviously pleased to have these thin, healthy supermen in their village. Bicycles are properly leaned against a wall. Their caps look a little dusty. Studying the glasses a person might guess they are enjoying some of Belgium’s finest beverage. Maybe, in the late 1920s the French brewed excellent beer. Are they drinking before a race or after a race? Can one look this good after a race back in the 1920s? Let’s assume this is post-race. Someone won, someone didn’t. Two rivals can still have a laugh and a glass of quality malted recovery beverage to make the day complete. These brothers of the road are enjoying some beautiful ale and having a nice time doing it.
As we have pointed out many times, we didn’t invent these Rules, we just wrote some of them down.
@Malfadactus
You would have to be period-specific in every respect. No helmet, flip-flop wheel for gear shifting, etc.
What kind of eyewear are you using? Are you getting a draft behind the eyes that is drying them out or, forgive the obvious question, are you forgetting to blink? I can’t really think of reasons outside those two that would cause dry eyes, but maybe @Buck Rogers who is an eye surgeon would know?
I have gotten to the point in some efforts where I’ve forgotten to blink and my eyes dry out. Blinking more often helps with that!
I’d say if there is a draft behind your shades, you don’t have the right sun glasses for your face. Try something else with better coverage – maybe a jawbone or something more like that.
@frank
Alex is a proper hardman. Hardly looked out of breath as he dragged us round the Roubaix route. He also took us on the most perfect recovery ride the next morning.
He raced his penny farthing in London recently, not sure if he’s doing the penny farthing race at the London Nocturn but the whole event would make a good night out. Unfortunately, I’m off for a weekend in Rome but it would be a great opportunity for London Velominati to get together for a few beers.
@Chris Unfortunately, I’m off for a weekend in Rome.
Seriously? you use the word “unfortunately.” I’ll swap you, a weekend in West Bend, WI for your weekend in Rome. Mind you, the traffic around here will be better than in the Eternal City and hopefully they’ll have caught the pedophile who’s on the loose! Encountered all kinds of sheriffs and an overhead helicopter last night while I was out. I felt so pro, what with the helicopter overhead, but alas, it was busy doing more important stuff than covering my 90 km ride.
@Malfadactus Yeah, as Frank says, forgetting to blink can really exacerbate dry eye and this happends to me when I ride sometimes or even during surgery. We are trained during residency to remember to blink when operating under the microscope b/c when you are inherently focusing on a near task with total concentration you suppress your blink reflex and your eyes dry out and blur. It is much worse for people with dry eyes. Frank nailed everything, though. Use wrap around sunglasses. If you wear contact lenses it can be worse as well as your eyes will dry out faster. Besides blinking more, getting better/tighter fitting sunglasses, and not wearing contacts, there’s not a lot you can do. You can use artificial tears but I would not want to try to put those in while actually riding!
@Buck Rogers
It’s refreshing to hear a Christian say that. If there is a hell, all the Velominati will be meeting up there. It will be fun.
I’m Mr. Last Year’s Model. However now that I’m loosely sponsored by Parentini, I’ve put the vest in the mail for you. Keep an eye out for it.
@Buck Rogers
Thanks for the input. I have been shopping for a new set of glasses that will fit tighter, and I have an appointment with the eye doc next week. But the old pictures with the goggles made me wonder if new glasses would just be a half-measure that might or might not work. I guess the real issue is whether I would feel sillier in absurdly expensive pro-style sunglasses, or in absurdly retro old-style goggles.
@chris – the nocturne is a great night out. A friend of mine has done the folding bike race A couple of times. Alex Dowsett in the main event last year was spectacular – dieselled off the front and ended up lapping the field. The cheer he got when he got back on the group was enormous!
@the Engine
You poms and your Wiggo fanboyism. Take it from a ‘murican: this will not end well.
@Malfadactus
The Tifosi Pave frames with the “Light Night Fototec” lens work well for me and are not that expensive.
@Malfadactus The goggles will probably fog up really quickly, which will keep the eyes moist but make it a bit hard to make out the road in front of you…
@Gianni
Well you know, the V symbol could be read as a V surrounded by a circle of wee, orange-colored flames . . . Just sayin’.
Also, sitting at the feet of the great Satan and having his head patted and stroked will, of course, be the COTHO from Texas.
@wiscot
Damn, hadn’t thought about the whole COTHO thing. Might have to try to mend my ways afterall.
@wiscot
It’s not called the Eternal City without reason. It’s been there for a few thousand years so the odd week here or there isn’t going to make much difference. Don’t get me wrong, I’m really looking forward to the weekend, it’ll be three days of very good food and fine booze with old friends, but it is unfortunate that it clashes with the Nocturne.
The weekend after is Festum Prophetae. I’m not going to celebrate with a long ride but I’ll be a marshal at the Circuit of the Fens, a National A race that my local club is helping to organise. The top UK teams are likely to be there so it’s likely to generate some good crowds and a great atmosphere. I’ve got a marshalling spot at the sprint prime outside a pub on the furthest point of the course. After the race has passed through, there’ll be plenty of time to get to the finish to see them go through a couple of times before the finale. My kids are pretty excited about it already.
@Joe
Next time. Wonder if we can get a V-team entered.
Are you London based?
Cheap welding goggles would look the part, but I’m not sure how functional they’d be…lenses are pretty dark. Fancier options available from purveyors of steampunk goods.
@Nate
bit like riding in scotland then
@Gianni
nae chance o’ that at a’
Cool photo.
I like to think Leducq is saying to his vanquished opponent, “Friend, I fucking slayed you on the col.” to which they are chuckling in agreement..
@Buck Rogers
Suffered dry eye once. Very sore. Painful. Doing the Around the Bay in Melbourne last year, coming into Melbourne I could hardly see. Almost abandoned with only 3km to go. Nearly blind, not sun, but salt air blowing off the bay as I road along the famous Beach Road. This year I’ll take cheap goggles for that 18km stretch. I’ll use them if I need too.
Yeah if you suffer from dry eyes during a ride you need sunglasses that don’t let in nearly so much air.
I used to ride with a pair of ray bans, just normal looking ones you’d wear off the bike. Was fine on shorter rides, but on longer rides, especially on warm summer days, I’d suffer from blurry/stinging eyes from being exposed to wind that would go around the lenses for 5 or 6 hours straight.
I have Jawbones now and they completely eliminated that issue, as they hug the face tightly and don’t let nearly as much wind in. I can’t imaging riding without them now.
@mcsqueak
Thank you. I’ll investigate Jawbones.
@Docbrian You do not need goggles to ride along Beach Rd FFS. What are you thinking?
@chris – I’m a life long Londoner but recently transplanted to Los Angeles for work. Enjoying the hills and the good weather!
@Joe
Never buy Corona, not ever.
Now in LA? What a weird place. So fucking spread out.That is a change from London in almost all ways. At least the cycling is drier. But the lack of pubs, a big problem.
@Marcus
When your eyes are falling out of their sockets because of salt burn, yes you do!
Great photo and anyone who looks this relaxed post race either has reserves of V enough to power several large scale powerstations or is on the sherbert again!
I’m going with the former..
@DocBrian
I doubt it’s from salt air blowing off the sea. I’ve never heard anyone complaining of that in years of sailing.
More likely its a grain of sand or salt from the beach acting as an irritant.
@DocBrian – Maybe…(yes, they’re transparent!)
@Chris
Question…..Is there one for every Rule? and can you have one for every rule obeyed on a ride? Now that would be Badass! Flaccus
Bear in mind that dry eyes may also be a function of poor head positioning relative to direction of travel. Your helmet or cycling cap should disturb the airflow around your eyes and face. I used to get dry stinging eyes when I started out riding, but I don’t any more. This is probably because I have changed my seat and bar positions and have a much improved, classic riding style.
Weeping due to hyper-V-ification also helps.
@Flaccus
That would probably limit me to adhering to a couple of rules only which would result in both me and the bike looking shit.
I would suggest that for mere mortals like myself Belgian beers should be treated like mountains. If the percentage is pushing up above 7% it should be taken with caution and probably only a couple at a time.
On the morning after my last birthday one of the other dads kindly took my lads to their rugby matches. I couldn’t open my eyes or move my head and there altogether far too many empty 10s in the kitchen. Mrs Chris tells me that there was a point at which I could have stopped that wouldn’t have resulted in half as much damage.
It’s odd that when it comes to beer my common sense gene seems to be sadly defective yet when it comes to the mountains it was quite happy to tell me that the Hautacam, Luz Ardiden and the Tourmalet was probably pushing it.
@Joe
I hope you know about sunscreen.
@Malfadactus
Expensive sunglasses are expensive for a reason: they are very good. Try some JawBones or something similar. You will be out a pretty penny, but vision is worth it, I’d say.
The goggles will backfire on you very quickly as they will prevent any kind of ventilation and they’ll fog etc. From your statement above, I gather you’ve not invested in good shades; buy or borrow a pair from a mate and go that route first. There is a big difference between top of the line shades and the stuff at the budget end.
@frank
Jawbones have been replaced by Racing Jackets in Oakley’s lineup FYI. They are the same, just can do a strap now. I think there was some legal issue with the name as well.
I’ve been very satisfied with Optic Nerve Eyeques that I got for much less than Oakleys. Four shades of lens as well.
Speaking of the drink, the New Yorker Feb. 11 & 18 issue has a nice article on whisky, particularly the resuscitation of the Bruichladdich distillery. Nice run-down of what goes into making whisky. Oh yeah, and it has a guy on the cover sporting a neck tattoo of…a bicycle. Looks to be a hybrid though…
Fellow contact wearer, dry-eyer. I only wear contacts when cycling and playing futbol. Used to wear them all the time but they really bother my eyes at this point if I go over a few hours. (which reminds me, I’m up for my 2 year free glasses/contacts!). I always wear shades when cycling, even just clear ones in low-light or during cx riding in the woods when it’s dim. I have a pair of Oakley Radars with Pitch lenses (that I found!) and those provide a lot of coverage, best out of the 4-5 cycling-specific shades I have. I’m after some Path lenses since these cover half of my face, but they provide great coverage. Definitely no need for goggles, or to suffer dry eyes! Good luck.
And TGIF everyone! Hope you get some good, long weekend rides in!
And regarding budget shades/quality – I have three pairs of nice Oakleys that offer really excellent lens quality and vision. Nice as. I also have some Uvex shades that I got off a bargain site for around $30 with three sets of lenses. The optics are great for the price, but nowhere near the Oakleys. Not sure about top-model Uvex, as these were mid-range. But, I was after so decent, inexpensive shades for cross riding/racing so that I’ll only have to worry about my teeth if I go in face first, not teeth + shades.
@Ron mmmmmmmmmmmm Bruichladdich, my favourite.
As for contacts, have you tried daily disposables with a high silicone content? They allow your eyes to breath much more easily. Previously my eyes would dry out a bit by the end of work and I was told I might have to stop wearing them. Now I pop them in when I get up and take them out when I go to bed. Perfect.
@Malfadactus
Perhaps a pair of Oakley’s finest would be in order
@Ron
Which are better: Jawbones or Radar? By the way, does TGIF refer to shoes, and if so it must be a reminder to slower cyclists that: “toes go in first.”
@gianni – the lack of pubs is disconcerting, even more the lack of al fresco boozing. So many sunny evenings going to waste for lack of beer gardens..
@nate – will need it soon. Face, arms and legs have turned a dirty brown, the rest is still polar white. regulation issue.
Bruichladdich used to be part owned by a mate of my boss. REAL character….lovely dram. Still like Talisker and bum basic Laphroaig a bit better maybe….
@Joe
Tinhorn Flats is a bar in Burbank, has a beer garden. There are a few god pubs in Hollywood, Santa Monica ( bit touristy) and dotted around the Valley.
Where do you ride Joe?
@seemunkee
Wasn’t thinking eyewear …
One warm but windy day I was descending at the regulation “ludicrous” speed when my contact lenses shrivelled up from lack of blinking and fell out of my eyes. I suddenly found myself riding blind but managed to come to a safe stop. Luckily the lenses had stuck to the inside of my shades, I then spent a considerable time by the roadside getting the lenses moistened with spit and trying to get them back in using my sunglasses as a mirror. Note to self, “Blink ye fanny”.
@eenies
Nothing to do with any of this but were you one of the Fleet Feet people in the late 80’s early 90’s in Stonehaven?
@paolo – ta for that. Red Lion in Silverlake serves good German beer and has a nice garden. I live in Echo Park and work in Hollywood so do a lot of extended loops out around Griffith and Elysian parks. Got to get out into the Santa Monica / Gabriel mts soon for some proper riding.
@Joe
There used to be a really cool Indian in Silverlake on Sunset called Tantra,
Anyhoo if you don’t mind riding with a Brummie ( without the black country accent) and I am no great shakes as a rider I can tell you but I’d be happy to show you around the Santa Monicas sometime. There’s some great rides. We can probably exchange emails through Frank. Let me know. I’m off every other weekend and I have lots of time off during the week.
@the Engine
No, closer to Sandhaven than Stonehaven and my feet have never been very fleet.
@paolo – sounds good to me mate!