The Keepers
Cycling is a mighty sport with a rich and complex history. Every company, racer, piece of kit, and component has a legend, a story behind it; in many cases it also has a personal and nostalgic connection to our lives. While this particular sport is steeped in tradition, it is also fiercely modern, a fact that serves only to deepen its complexity.
All these factors combine to provide an unique atmosphere and breeds devoted and loyal disciples of our great sport. We are of a peculiar nature; we seek out the highest mountains and the roughest roads on which to worship at the altar of the Man with the Hammer. Our legs are what propel us; our minds are what drive us. We refer to our shaved legs in the third person – the legs – and speak of distance in kilometres and measure sizes in centimetres regardless of what country we are in. We adhere strictly to the Canon of Cycling’s Etiquette: The Rules.
A Velominatus is a disciple of the highest order. We spend our days poring over the very essence of what makes ours such a special sport and how that essence fits into Cycling’s colorful fabric. This is the Velominati’s raison d’être. This is where the Velominati can be ourselves. This is our agony – our badge of honor – our sin.
I have a unique way of looking at bicycles. A good bicycle and it’s components are beautiful things to me. I’m not just talking about appearance, but also how the frame and components show the dreams of those who made them.
– Gianni Bugno, Hardman and Italian cycling legend
Perhaps we are too wrapped up in the past, but the Velominati don’t believe that to be the case. After all, the greatest lessons can be learned from the past and those lessons can then be applied to the present and may then allow us to more fully experience the future.
The Keepers:
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The Community:
Velominati.com is less about the articles and more about the conversation. Those of you who read more and poster more, become an integral part of the discussion and help carry the momentum forward. There are several levels of Velominatus*:
Level 4 Velominatus: The casual observer and occasional poster.
Level 3 Velominatus: The regular reader and casual poster.
Level 2 Velominatus: The devoted reader and regular poster.
Level 1 Velominatus: The most committed of reader and poster.
Gray, Black, and Orange Order Velominatus: Once having passed Level 1, the inducted among the Order wear three color badges, based on their rank.
Conduct:
We strive to foster an open, fun, critical, and censure-free environment. Any criticism of our writing, spelling, grammar, or intelligence is welcome and nothing said will ever get you suspended from the site. That said, the code of conduct is governed by Rule #43 and the Piti Principle. Members consistently exhibiting behavior that falls outside these parameters will be warned to check themselves; should warnings go unheeded, we may elect to issue a suspension. The first offense will result in a one-week suspension, the second in a two week suspension, and the third in a three week suspension. A fourth offense will result in a lifetime ban.
Velominati reserves the right to edit posts with the express interest to preserve the spirit of the conversation and the community. Regarding posts that address a grammatical or typographical error, Velominati may elect to take their input, correct the error in the articles where appropriate, and editing posts that point them out. This editorial action is not to serve as a censure entity, but to preserve the spirit of the conversation. That said, we endeavor to only edit those posts that point out a minor issue and only in the event that we make the edit before the post has yielded further discussion. Furthermore, when possible, we will strive to acknowledge said poster for their correction.
Want to contribute a story to the Velominati? Tell us why.
*Levels are calculated based on the previous year’s activity.
Yep right I love how when your comments go up the ticker on the side they always cut them off at the most inappropriate place possible.
@minion
Just as a matter of interest, does anybody ever accept an invitation to Friday night dinner at your place?
@minion
And exactly where would it be appropriate to cut that post off?
@frank
Frank: just got my V Kit and LOVE it…however, it is too small. How can I go about exchanging my large for a X-large. Sorry bout this, but all my other kits are larges…jersey only need exchange.
@minion
You’re right, I’m not, even if invited to. But it is an awesome expression.
@Jeff in PetroMetro
I piss on my own fish and chips. I’m all that and then some.
@Steampunk
Bold. Most dudes don’t admit to it.
@Marko
It ain’t bragging if it’s true.
@Steampunk
Ha! I think Marko’s go it.
@Steampunk
Well played.
@Blah
Your not picking the right peeps.
@G’phant
Depends who’s full of piss and vinegar.
@Jeff in PetroMetro
Ooh! Chips!
@Blah
Before the typing phase of posting comments, probably.
@Jeff in PetroMetro
And it also depends on how much you enjoy fish and chips.
@minion
Not much, any more.
@G’phant
Ah. Yes. Well. I’ll have the salad, if you don’t mind. Thanks!
If that’s whats happening to the fish and chips what do you think the Salad dressing’s going to be like?
I would be ashamed for the turn this conversation has taken if I had any decency or manners.
@minion
Manners are like toe nails – everyone’s got ’em, but standards vary greatly. Decency, on the other hand …
@G’phant
This salad has great croutons!
Trimmed the toenails just this morning…
Oh pardon me folks. Stumbled on this cooking site by accident. I thought I clicked on the the most hardcore cycling blog around.
@minion
No, not the green salad, thank you. I meant the tuna salad.
@pakrat
Given the recipes being discussed, I think you stumbled onto a hardcore cooking site. Salt? Vinegar? Fuck it. I’ll just whip it out.
@Jeff in PetroMetro
Tuna Salad? I’m sorry sir we’re not that kind of establishment. I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to leave.
@G’phant
I’m tempted to post a photo of my little toe nail. He’s like the hunchback of Notre Dame without the good looks.
Jezzus. I head out to the mountains for a nice afternoon and come back to folks whipping out their junk and giving each others food a golden shower, virtually. I usually go to a different site for that.
And this:
http://www.proform.com/tour-de-france/
the world really is coming to an end, huh? All Pharmed out. Probably get the yellow wrist cock rings if I “order right now”.
@scaler911
Replying to myself, why is that dude wearing a helmet? He’s not going anywhere.
@scaler911
And why’s he a stationery bike with scenery like that to go and explore? Proper hills, not simulations.
And while I appreciate scaler911’s effort to bring the discussion back from the depths, I have to put forward the following. In the UK, there’s a town called Grimsby that’s famous for its fishing industry and their football club has a chant that goes “We piss on your fish, yes we do, yes we do”. Now I thought they were just being disgusting but I’ll the conversation above has put that in a different light.
@Jonny @scaler911
Good for you indeed for bringing the conversation up from the depths indeed – that said, still on topic, another East Coast of England fish related activity is to be found in Lowestoft, where the Common Skate is the centre of frustration relief for the local fishermen out at sea for weeks on end – apparently it is a common site to see then nailed to the central bulkhead
So that’s bottomed that one out…..
– back to the geezer with the helmet on – clearly narcolepsy is the biggest health risk here, so head protection is a wise precaution
@Dr C
Fill in the blank: The common skate is to Lowestoft as the sheep is to ____________.
@scaler911
The ad is clearly trying to make that guy look as much like Lance as possible. My first casual glance made me think just that. Now, why the lookalike needs a helmet? Blame the marketing department.
@Jonny @scaler911
Oi, and that’s the Columbia river gorge in the background as well! To me, that makes a bad ad for a silly product even worse, as that is A+ cycling territory right there.
Here’s a photo of me with the same background. It probably means I should have just stayed home and used my ProForm trainer.
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@mcsqueak
Awesome work – did you really cycle up there since 911 posted that?
I can imagine how beautiful it must be up there – do you live there?
I did the Gorge back in my windyboarding days, outrageous spot – bit like descending full chat on a bike all day with no uphill bits, as the river hoors upwind faster than you can get back down it, and nuclear in places, albeit a bit crash and burn – all that with snowboarding on Mt Hood 10 minutes up the road
Great local beers too – is that the land of Brown Bear Lager and Black Bear Ale? (maybe that is Canadia I am thinking of)
Truly one of the greatest places on the planet (if you ignore the guy with the helmet on his crosstrainer….)
@mcsqueak
….hey, you look pretty high up too
@Dr C
Ha, no this photo was taken about two months ago when I did a ride up through there…. I just recognized the background and had to share.
I live very close, yes – awesome place to be in terms of outdoor activities, to be sure. Always lots of windsurfers out on the river, as you pointed out!
I’ll probably go back there again before the end of the summer – my ideal ride would leave from my house, go out there and back, which would be about ~130 km round-trip. The spot where the photo was taken isn’t that high up, I think right around 1,000 ft. if I remember correctly.
If you go out to Multnomah falls and back along the “historic Columbia river highway” (before the modern Interstate was built nearby), you get to climb it both directions. At the very top here is a little lookout/parking area with a sweet old stone building.
I’m not sure about those beer names – they may be from around here, I certainly don’t have all the local beer names memorized, but it could be from Washington or Canada as well.
@mcsqueak
You may achieve lots in your life old boy, but what you have there is as good as it gets, enjoy it while you can before someone tries to lock you in an office until you are too old to take advantage of it
Actually that was even cooler to be able to get a photo lined up with the sign of the Merckx without having gone there today! – like a massive home run in baseball – brilliant
@Dr C
I’m already a cube drone. It’s pretty fantastic, really. All the artificial lighting and bad coffee you can drink!
I do try and keep it in perspective when I’m not at work though, and it certainly helps to keep it in mind when it’s raining for six months straight! Don’t think I’d want to live anywhere else, though.
@Dr C
I do the ride that McSqueek is talking about all the time. It’s very nice, with some other options to climb more (or less). And my favorite ride that I can do from home: (this is info for you squeak) you turn south just after you ride thru Corbitt and follow the Sandy River though Bull Run. You end up at the 7-11 on the east side of Sandy. You can either follow 26 back to Gresham, or take one of the roads turning north just west of 7-11 and go through the farmland back to Troutdale (the better option IMHO). Probably be about 120K from your house RT.
@scaler911
Maybe I’ll join you next time you are out – will need to start with a big bit of cake and a coffee though, as I am 3000 miles away – did 65K hilly run last night, 1000 metres if altitude, not sure I’d cope in your company, as it nearly killed me!
Another great spot: McKenzie Pass.
I’m sure that nobody will notice the earbuds dangling there. I would never break Rule #62.
@scaler911
First glance I thought, nice earrings
Looks like you have photoshopped a couple of snowy peaks onto a picture of you on your last ride on the moon – was there a recent eruption there (that area’s part of that supervolcano ring thing they make disaster movies out of, non?)
you guys are spoilt over there – all we have here are drumlins (you’ll have to google that if interested), pishing rain and ignorant drivers
:o(
@Dr C
Nope. It’s the Lava fields of the Sisters/ Mt. Bachelor, Mt. Jefferson area. Nothing active at the moment. It is really nice here in the Pacific NW. Except for the 200+ days of rain/ drizzle etc. Summers tho…………
@scaler911
hey scaler – missed your post and saw it too late for a cornell ride. Dont know if you have done it but in that Bull run ride if you go left down ten eyk rd and then left on shipley rd you get another hill and some great forest to ride through – and if your feeling keen and can get a lift back to PDX you can continue up to Lolo Pass and then drop down to Lost Lake and down to Hood River…. :O)
@Gerard
It was nice to ride Cornell w/o cars. A nice morning weather wise and good company. Next time.
I’ve done the ‘option 2’ part of Bull Run and yep, it’s nice. I’ve been up Lolo to climb at French’s Dome, but never ridden it. It would be a pretty epic distance from my doorstep, but now you’ve got me thinking………….
yeah would be a loooong ride, I have ridden from HR to Lolo Pass, and from Dodge Park to Mt Hood Village, but as yet have not connected the two. I reckon its about 85 miles from my place in SE to HR via Lolo Pass…
I am doing Cycle Oregon with the VMH in Sept which will fun…. I will likely doing battle with 53rd again this lunchtime..
@Gerard
Nice. I’m working, but may roll out and do PIR tonight. Little ride I have planned for Friday:
http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/44114512/?open_ive_done=1
cool – I have to send you a friend request on Mapmyride apparently :O) yeah I was thinking about PIR, its either that or Crossfit or sitting on my porch with a mojito…. tough call!