Categories: Accessories and GearThe Rules

On Rules #26 and #65: Spring Theory

Always store your bike in the mechanic's position: small-small to ease tension on the derailleur springs. Photo: Pedale.Forchetta

To hold opposing truths in one’s heart is a beautiful thing; to find resonance within contradiction is a liberating force that opens one’s mind to a wide world of possibilities. Life lived in black and white is a bland, simple world, after all: everything interesting in life happens in the gray space in between.

There is nothing outwardly in conflict between Rules #26 and #65, but within the application of Rule #26 we run the risk of violating Rule #65. Whenever storing one’s bicycle, whether for the evening or for an extended period of time, one is to take care to place the chain in a little-little configuration. This is done by Pro racers out of respect for their mechanic by making their life just a little bit easier when they remove the wheels before getting the bike a clean and sparkling for the next day’s training or racing.

We, the humble plonkers, presumably don’t have a personal or team mechanic who rubs our beloved steed with a diaper post-ride. But there lurks another reason why this practice is an important one to undertake: leaving the chain in the big dog and mid or high cassette as we would when gussying our girl up to be photographed puts the springs in the derailleurs under tension, causing them to wear out more quickly. Placing them little-little leaves them nice and relaxed, all rested up for your next soul crushing session.

I can not overstate that this in no way allows us to photograph or allow someone else to photograph our steed in this relaxed state, much like we would not allow ourselves to be photographed while laying on the couch wearing compression socks and moaning about our guns.

[rule number=26]

[rule number=65]

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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Tugman says:

Jan 9 2016 at 5:41 am

@cognition

I believe a certain French make would better suit them...

Although Il Pirata is not sure what the trouble is...
Mike Britton says:

Jan 9 2016 at 7:17 am

@Dave

Agree wholeheartedly, and I'd like to assert that switching to small/small means your cables will relax slightly, increasing the chances of bad shifts at the beginning of the next ride.
cognition says:

Jan 9 2016 at 12:02 pm

@Tugman

@cognition

I believe a certain French make would better suit them…

Although Il Pirata is not sure what the trouble is…

I hear you. I loved Pantani's panache (is there a good Italian translation for panache? Grinta is clearly a different concept). Heretically, though, I never liked the yellow-and-celeste mix.
Mikael Liddy says:

Jan 10 2016 at 10:02 pm

Just on the Rule #65 adherence, I've recently started using a new website Bicycle Log Book to arrange services through the LBS near work, once they've finished the work you get a report card through the site that details the work done & gives an overall condition of the bike as well. Have to admit I got a little kick of satisfaction in reading this...
bea says:

Jan 11 2016 at 12:05 am

So I read the article last week and could only role my eyes...

And then I came home from my ride and found myself putting the chain on the small cogs... *zucht*
KogaLover says:

Jan 11 2016 at 12:39 am

@bea

Never did it before (trying to adhere to Rule #90) but yesterday I even left the bike on the turbo trainer in small-small. Next thing on my list: release tension on the brakes. Already done: release the tension on the rear tyre from the tacx-dynamo.

Question: anyone know a good site with training/workout videos without cyclists featuring EPMS? Ruins my training....
PT says:

Jan 11 2016 at 1:49 am

@KogaLover

@bea

Never did it before (trying to adhere to Rule #90) but yesterday I even left the bike on the turbo trainer in small-small. Next thing on my list: release tension on the brakes. Already done: release the tension on the rear tyre from the tacx-dynamo.

Question: anyone know a good site with training/workout videos without cyclists featuring EPMS? Ruins my training….

This is a fair but unfortunately mis-placed concern. I think you will find that training/workout videos are responsible for ruining your training. If you must train on a wind-trainer (and we all must stoop sometimes) please only watch recorded stages of grand tours or monuments to pass the time.
PT says:

Jan 11 2016 at 1:59 am

@Teocalli

@Ccos

@Gianni

OK, I’m going to write a post on wiping off one’s tires after riding through debris. Does it help anything? Probably not. Do I keep doing it? Yes. Will I keep doing it even if I know it makes no difference? Yes. Will I instruct everyone else do the same? Hell yes.

Yes please, write it. We did this religiously until my buddy got his hand jammed between his tire and seat tube on his new Tarmac some years back. He came to a quick and hilarious stop followed by an equally funny flop onto his side with his hand still jammed in place (funny at least to me). These aero bikes are fucking with some old habits I’ll have you know.

Sensible me read that in the original post as cleaning them after a ride. Cleaning with your hand at speed during a ride seems like the sort of stupidity worthy of Darwinian Selection.

If you need to clean your tyres with your hands while riding you are approaching the problem the wrong way. Instead, if you ride fast enough, your bike will float over all obstacles, no matter how sharp. The tyres will have passed beyond the possible source of damage before it is able to make ingress into the tube. It is not proven but it may be explained by Brownian Motion, possibly String Theory too. Bernoulli can definitely take a small amount of credit.

Whatever the case, this is the secret to using tubulars on a daily basis, riding very fast, all the time. Its also why pro mechanics don't mind changing tubulars for pros - the correct velocity has been observed and its not their fault that the tyre has been poorly constructed and failed to keep its responsibilities.

Please everybody, ride properly and look after your tyres: ride fast.
frank says:

Jan 11 2016 at 7:40 am

@PT

This theory also applies to riding cobbles. Just go so fast you become a hover craft.
RobSandy says:

Jan 22 2016 at 1:39 am

Picked up my bike from my local wrench last night. He's the sort of guy who cleans your bike and lines up your skewers properly even though he's not doing anything with your wheels, just because that's the way it should be done.

Anyway, I checked the location of the chain when I picked it up, bearing in mind he had been servicing my headset, not doing anything to the drive train - little-little.