Reverence: Pedro’s Bike Lust

Glossy shiny goodness thanks to Pedro’s Bike Lust

I met a nice character a few weeks ago on a magnificent ride through the Bay Area. He rode a Colnago C-50 which was so filthy that I was unable to ascertain with any degree of certainty what color it was painted. I spent most of the ride suppressing the impulse to lead him and his bike through a local car wash. As it turns out, he’s based out of Asia, and the monsoon which is in full swing has the  effect of turning white bikes black on the roads surrounding his adopted home of Hong Kong, which I always thought was an ape but apparently is also a city.

I’m what some people might call “obsessive” about keeping my bike clean. Even my Nine Bike gets a thorough washing if not after each ride, then at least after every other. A clean bike is easier to maintain, shifts more precisely, brakes better (if for some reason you want to go less fast), and the components wear more slowly. Not to mention that a clean bike is a beautiful bike. The secret to being able to clean your bikes often is a fifteen minute cleaning routine which I’ll detail another time. For now, lets leave it at having the right brushes and tools in place to quickly and easily get into all the hard-to-reach areas on a bike.

For many years, I assumed I had reached the high water mark in bike cleaning. Ego, it would seem, infects us all at one time or another. To quick I was to believe that cleanliness is godliness. There I sat, lonely upon my high horse of pride and arrogance, until my friend Charlie on Maui introduced me to a product called Pedro’s Bike Lust. And just like that, I was sent back to Earth in the knowledge that I still had much to learn.

This stuff is incredible; it sprays onto carbon, steel, aluminum, or rubber. It cleans and wipes off without leaving any residue. A little bit of rubbing and it brings out an as-new polished finish, covering and filling small scratches – it even diminishes the big scratches caused when, hypothetically speaking, your bike is blown over in the wind on Mount Saint Helens and scrapes along some jagged volcanic rocks. Hypothetically. I also spray it liberally on my saddle, which makes it very slippy and good for sliding forward and back as-needed for crushing fools.

At this point, I’m a complete junkie; I can hardly resist a little bump before each ride, just to get my head right and make my bike gleam beneath me as I set out on my ride. The only downside is the silicone-covered surface makes it harder for grit and mud to stick to the frame and show off how hard core your Rule #9 ride was.

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frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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  • @Ccos

    @Owen

    @frank

    @Owen

    Maybe this stuff will be the product that finally keeps the bugs off during mating season. apparently the mere sight of #1 gets them all hot and bothered. ends up looking like the front grill of my car after I drove across the country.

    Where do you live, in the biblical middle east? I need to hear more about this bug infestation.

    Arizona highlands. There are times when you'd swear you were in Egypt when Moses was causing a hubbub. I know all the spots on my routes in which I need to breathe through my nose for a bit to avoid extra protein going down the pipes.

    Not sure if this has been touched upon in previous articles but the unintentional consumption of flying things remains that most unpleasant of occupational hazards for our ilk.

    That said a petite lapin recently tried to dissect himself beneath my wheels at speed. Eating a bug or two certainly is less stressful (Merckx I hope none were mating though) .

    Back in Northern Minnesota riding mountain bikes in Pilsbury Forest, we used to choose our clothing based on the 'bug weather'. Fucking awful, riding in massive humid heat with full length jackets on, just to keep the deer flies from being able to get a foothold.

  • @Owen

    Not sure if this has been touched upon in previous articles but the unintentional consumption of flying things remains that most unpleasant of occupational hazards for our ilk.

    That said a petite lapin recently tried to dissect himself beneath my wheels at speed. Eating a bug or two certainly is less stressful (Merckx I hope none were mating though) .

    Decapitated a mouse once. Thank Merckx the bladed spokes made it quick for the little guy.

    There is a photo of a squirrel meeting it's end in a disc brake (and a number of other parts of bikes) but thought those may be objected if I posted - but in looking I came across this hazard.......

  • I like a shiny bike as much as anyone, but please don't use any silicone-based product on or near a frame you might need to have repainted or repaired. It seeps through the paint to the substrate, is almost impossible to remove, and can fuck up subsequent painting, bonding, even brazing. Some paint and coating facilities have banned "cockrings for your arms" because they offgas enough silicone to contaminate surfaces before they're finished.

  • @frank

    @Ccos

    @Owen

    @frank

    @Owen

    Maybe this stuff will be the product that finally keeps the bugs off during mating season. apparently the mere sight of #1 gets them all hot and bothered. ends up looking like the front grill of my car after I drove across the country.

    Where do you live, in the biblical middle east? I need to hear more about this bug infestation.

    Arizona highlands. There are times when you'd swear you were in Egypt when Moses was causing a hubbub. I know all the spots on my routes in which I need to breathe through my nose for a bit to avoid extra protein going down the pipes.

    Not sure if this has been touched upon in previous articles but the unintentional consumption of flying things remains that most unpleasant of occupational hazards for our ilk.

    That said a petite lapin recently tried to dissect himself beneath my wheels at speed. Eating a bug or two certainly is less stressful (Merckx I hope none were mating though) .

    Back in Northern Minnesota riding mountain bikes in Pilsbury Forest, we used to choose our clothing based on the 'bug weather'. Fucking awful, riding in massive humid heat with full length jackets on, just to keep the deer flies from being able to get a foothold.

    Stopped at a gas station the other day to buy water. Felt a strange itch coming from the crotchal area - nice wee deer tick had somehow gotten into my shorts. How he got in there I have no idea.

  • @Harminator Love this.  I have used Pedro's products in the past and thought they worked well enough.  But this picture for this topic is just right.

  • Have to give that a look. I usually wash the bike with Simple Green, then polish up the bits with an Armor All wipe (except the seat of course).

  • I have white cable housing on some of my steeds. In the future, even when going white, I'm going to use a black section for the chainstay-to-RD section. Impossible to keep that bit clean and it looks bad all half grey.

  • @pistard

    I like a shiny bike as much as anyone, but please don't use any silicone-based product on or near a frame you might need to have repainted or repaired. It seeps through the paint to the substrate, is almost impossible to remove, and can fuck up subsequent painting, bonding, even brazing. Some paint and coating facilities have banned "cockrings for your arms" because they offgas enough silicone to contaminate surfaces before they're finished.

    I sometimes use furniture polish. Just checked...and it includes "silicones." Are you saying one shouldn't be using this on painted bicycles? (I sure as hell don't want my Tommasini paint job breaking down). Please clarify, as now I'm alarmed.

    My Pedro's Bike Lust is labeled as "Water-Based Silicone Emulsion Polish" - this would lead me to believe it too contains silicone.

    Are you saying one should stop using these if they care about their paint jobs?

  • @Ron

    @pistard

    I like a shiny bike as much as anyone, but please don't use any silicone-based product on or near a frame you might need to have repainted or repaired. It seeps through the paint to the substrate, is almost impossible to remove, and can fuck up subsequent painting, bonding, even brazing. Some paint and coating facilities have banned "cockrings for your arms" because they offgas enough silicone to contaminate surfaces before they're finished.

    I sometimes use furniture polish. Just checked...and it includes "silicones." Are you saying one shouldn't be using this on painted bicycles? (I sure as hell don't want my Tommasini paint job breaking down). Please clarify, as now I'm alarmed.

    My Pedro's Bike Lust is labeled as "Water-Based Silicone Emulsion Polish" - this would lead me to believe it too contains silicone.

    Are you saying one should stop using these if they care about their paint jobs?

    No, not at all. As far as I know, it's perfectly safe on paint and other finishes. The problem comes when trying to paint or refinish something that's been treated with silicone. It's so slippery and tenacious that it's very difficult to remove all traces of it, leading to flaws in the new finish. Ask an automobile painter or luthier about silicone contamination if you want to hear a blue streak.

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