Categories: Accessories and GearKitLook Pro

The Tightness of Being

Diego Caccia demonstrates how to make tights work. Photo: Pedale.Forchetta

Sprezzatura. Leave it to the Italians to dedicate a word to trying to Look Fantastic without looking like you’re trying too hard. I’ve haven’t spent much time in Italy, but I automatically love a country where an entire nation holds aesthetics in the same high regard that I do. Not to mention their dedication to drinking espresso and wine. A bottle of wine at lunch? I can work with these people.

Sprezzatura for the Velominatus applies to every aspect of the sport; how we set up our bikes, our style and technique when riding, and how we select and wear our kit. Looking good in the summer isn’t very complicated; any fool can look good in short-sleeved kit adorned with tanned guns. Where things start getting tricky is when the cold and wet sets in and we need to add more kit to the equation. How does one control the chaos as leg warmers, long-sleeve jerseys, caps, gloves, rain jackets and overshoes are added to the mix?

The basic concepts have already been covered under the principles of wearing one’s Flandrian Best; always wear as little as possible, never wear an accoutrement below when a complimentary set is not worn above (i.e. no knee warmers without arm warmers), and never – under any circumstances – wear full-length leggings.

Which brings us to today’s lesson: how to wear full-length leggings and still look as Fantastic as possible. Sometimes it is simply too cold for three-quarters and there is no denying the Pro-ness of casually wandering about sipping a pre-ride espresso in sandals, full length leg warmers, and a long sleeve jersey – especially on a warm summer day. Sprezzatura is an art, and it should not be taken lightly.

The fundamental problem with leggings is that they make the guns amorphous; lots of fabric without any points of definition give the eyes nothing to focus on. If you have amazing calves (which I don’t) then you may be able to break up the monotony with your bodacious leg curves, but the rest of us are going to need some help.

Always go with leg warmers and not one-piece tights. The reason for this is simple: the legs of your shorts will provide the first visual delineation for the eyes to grab ahold of.
The leggings should also always have an elastic gripper around the ankle, not a stirrup. This is Cycling, not ballet. Better yet, the ankles should have a short zipper to ease pre-departure removal of said leggings and also to provide a little more delineation.
When it comes to materials, the more matte the better. In fact, I prefer wool. Thick materials are also handy, as they add some bulk and make the guns look less spindly. All good things.
Look for some leggings with good, thick seams. Again, this makes wool a strong candidate. Align the seams carefully to accentuate whatever curves your leggs can muster up, and make sure both legs are symmetrical. We are not savages.
Wear a contrasting color sock. White is preferable, of course, as demonstrated by Diego above but any color works so long as its not the same as the legging (which should obviously be black).

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

Next Look Pro: Stay Still »

Previous « Velominati Super Prestige: Milano-Sanremo 2015

View Comments

frank says:

Mar 24 2015 at 10:06 pm

@steelhead

Ok then Lets just all look fantastic who the fuck cares if were,re freezin our nuts off and thinkin we,re so hard all along the way , fashion rules !!! After all who in the world is tougher and more fashionable than we are .

Nothing says ,hardcore, like using all the wrong punctuation in all the right places. Beers all around!
DeKerr says:

Mar 24 2015 at 10:24 pm

@Dave

@frank

@John

@Dave

I love my toe warmers. Great for between 40 and 50F. How do you keep them not visible?

By never wearing them.

Ah. By toe warmers I mean the single use chemical ones that give off heat for several hours after begin exposed to air. You stick one atop the tip of each sock, obviously completely hidden inside your shoes. Above 50F shoes alone work. Between 40F and 50F hidden chemical toe warmers do the job. Below 40F when out more than a couple hours I have to add shoe covers. Results without these steps have gone beyond numbness; strayed into mild frostbite with dead skin layers.

FWIW I ride below freezing also, though below about 25F the outings are limited to an hour because the bottles freeze. This winter one of my commutes was 20F, and though only half an hour I was pretty glad to get back to the house. I have great respect for our brethren up North who ride in even colder conditions.

Metric motherfuckers, METRIC!!!
harminator says:

Mar 25 2015 at 1:20 am

@frank

@steelhead

Ok then Lets just all look fantastic who the fuck cares if were,re freezin our nuts off and thinkin we,re so hard all along the way , fashion rules !!! After all who in the world is tougher and more fashionable than we are .

Nothing says ,hardcore, like using all the wrong punctuation in all the right places. Beers all around!

Im sohardcoreI barelyusethefuckinspacebar
harminator says:

Mar 25 2015 at 1:28 am

@frank

@Mikael Liddy

@brett

@VeloSix

@piwakawaka

Socks should never go over tights. Thats the equivalent of tights over shorts.

that’s the truth…. like arm warmers over your sleeves…

A former Pro I used to work with (Matt Illingworth – Linda McCartney team) would wear his leg warmers over the shorts… looked like shit, but he insisted that was the way the Pros did it and as he is a big, angry Pom I’d not push the point too far…

IAM Barbie went that way on the weekend…a perfect example of why Looking Pro and & Looking Fantastic are not always the same thing (still no gloves though).

‘Tis a fine feeling to see the lessons we be teachin’ be gettin’ learned as well. One might argue to put the legging over both the socks and the bibs in order to facilitate the removal once the race is afoot, but Heinnie is making life outright difficult for himself here. Not to mention that if you require that much kit, surely gloves would be in order?

Have to respect a man who holds his brand above all else, I suppose. Imagine what he could do if helmets weren’t compulsory.

What the fuck is Sauceler up to anyway? At first I thought he was removing the tag from his new Dicuts but now I think he might be trying to inflate a gel or using a €20 note to undo a sticky valve....Story please!
RobSandy says:

Mar 25 2015 at 1:37 am

@harminator

I think he spotted a used scratchcard on the floor and is checking it to see if he could claim £20.
PT says:

Mar 25 2015 at 2:22 am

I have the same Giordana leg warmers as Diego. They work a treat.
ChrisO says:

Mar 25 2015 at 2:39 am

@DeKerr

@Dave

@frank

@John

@Dave

I love my toe warmers. Great for between 40 and 50F. How do you keep them not visible?

By never wearing them.

Ah. By toe warmers I mean the single use chemical ones that give off heat for several hours after begin exposed to air. You stick one atop the tip of each sock, obviously completely hidden inside your shoes. Above 50F shoes alone work. Between 40F and 50F hidden chemical toe warmers do the job. Below 40F when out more than a couple hours I have to add shoe covers. Results without these steps have gone beyond numbness; strayed into mild frostbite with dead skin layers.

FWIW I ride below freezing also, though below about 25F the outings are limited to an hour because the bottles freeze. This winter one of my commutes was 20F, and though only half an hour I was pretty glad to get back to the house. I have great respect for our brethren up North who ride in even colder conditions.

Metric motherfuckers, METRIC!!!

I don't know that the Rules intend for all units to be metric. Rule #24 refers to speeds and distances only.

I grew up mainly with metric and have trouble working out what's hot or not on the Fahrenheit scale but... I do get why people like it.

In everyday usage Celsius is only good in a narrow range. Zero to 40. After that... I don't care what temperature the water for my tea is, I just need to know whether it's boiling or not.

If I understood it I think I would probably be happy to go retro on the temperature, just as I still do on height with feet and inches. Although I'm fine with km and km/h, despite being old enough to remember changing over from miles.
brett says:

Mar 25 2015 at 2:45 am

@frank

@steelhead

Ok then Lets just all look fantastic who the fuck cares if were,re freezin our nuts off and thinkin we,re so hard all along the way , fashion rules !!! After all who in the world is tougher and more fashionable than we are .

Nothing says ,hardcore, like using all the wrong punctuation in all the right places. Beers all around!

We all know the hardcore factor is measured in exclamation points!!!!
wiscot says:

Mar 25 2015 at 6:21 am

@RobSandy

@harminator

I think he spotted a used scratchcard on the floor and is checking it to see if he could claim £20.

That's gold! Damn, I'm laughing my ass off.
gilvelo says:

Mar 25 2015 at 8:41 am

Just move to California where we do not use any of that shit!!!