Categories: Anatomy of a PhotoLa Vie Velominatus

Anatomy of a Photo: Bike Love

The look, of love... Photo via Oli's Tumblr

I got new wheels last week and got them mounted with tires by the weekend. Then @Haldy had to help me with a clearance problem on Sunday (27mm FMB Paris-Roubaix’s get to be more like 29mm tires after Francois finishes his lunchtime bottle of wine). When I wasn’t looking, @Haldy put orange cable ends on all the cables. A Velominatus can’t resist doing that sort of thing, you see.

Between the new wheels and orange bits, I feel like I have a new bike. I brought her up into the dining room and have spent yesterday evening and today morning working from the dining room table so I can gaze at her while “thinking”.

I’m tempted to bring her to work today, but I’ve got a few client meetings and I’m afraid my customers might think it a bit strange if I walk into the conference room wheeling my bike. The key thing that separates us from the rest of the world is that we think its normal to stare lovingly at an inanimate object.

We are Cyclists; the rest of the world merely rides a bike. Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

Next The Great Equalizer »

Previous « Guest Article: Sharjah a Trois

View Comments

Teocalli says:

Apr 1 2015 at 10:12 am

@Ron

I had forgotten what day it was when I got that email from Trek. I knew it was BS right away though, then I remembered it’s 4/1.

The selfie stick from Specialized…sorry, that whole craze is so fucking stupid I don’t even have the energy to laugh. Obesity and narcissism are going to be the modern health plagues that kill off humans in large numbers.

It's actually 1/4.

The worrying part about the selfie stick is that you just know there are people out there who will think it's a good idea.
Haldy says:

Apr 1 2015 at 11:49 am

@PeakInTwoYears

@Haldy

@PeakInTwoYears

@Haldy

I’d be grateful to know where you source the housing. I found one source of orange housing, but I’m just an ignorant git.

Are you referring to the brand of housing or which vendor? I have 3 or 4 different vendors to get orange housing from.

All I found was Shimano PTFE shift and brake cable and housing *sets* on Amazon. I’m curious to know what you’d use.

Shimano is what I would use, but I have access to the D/A level brake and shift kits, and that's what is going to be installed on @frank 's machine when he gets back.
frank says:

Apr 1 2015 at 1:12 pm

@Haldy

@frank

@Haldy

@PeakInTwoYears

When @frank gets back from the Keeper’s Tour we will have to wrestle his baby away from him and make that orange housing happen. I am sure it will need another thorough cleaning after crushing some souls across the fields of Flanders and Northern France.

Too much orange? Is that even possible? I’m willing to try; its only cables for fucks sake!

Too much orange..oh no, I don’t think so! I think it would look spectacular. I will order the appropriate supplies while you are laying down the V in the Holy Land.

Better be high-quality shit. I'll bring the beers.
PeakInTwoYears says:

Apr 1 2015 at 1:13 pm

@Haldy

Cool, thanks.
frank says:

Apr 1 2015 at 1:14 pm

@RobSandy

Before my TT a month ago I was keeping my bike in the house as I was doing a lot of turbo sessions. Since then it’s gone back in the shed and I realised I haven’t cleaned it since!

I feel bad. I mean, it’s not dirty, dirty. But I know it’s not clean and that’s just as bad.

Taking it down to the in-laws this weekend so I can give it a full clean and polish and be able to pass it off to the VMW as ‘packing’.

I've never done any of my bikes the indignity of putting them in the shed. Basement, garage, yes, but the shed feels like putting a dog in a dog house.
Haldy says:

Apr 1 2015 at 1:48 pm

@frank

@Haldy

@frank

@Haldy

@PeakInTwoYears

When @frank gets back from the Keeper’s Tour we will have to wrestle his baby away from him and make that orange housing happen. I am sure it will need another thorough cleaning after crushing some souls across the fields of Flanders and Northern France.

Too much orange? Is that even possible? I’m willing to try; its only cables for fucks sake!

Too much orange..oh no, I don’t think so! I think it would look spectacular. I will order the appropriate supplies while you are laying down the V in the Holy Land.

Better be high-quality shit. I’ll bring the beers.

I'm slightly insulted you think I would put inferior quality on your steed. While I can make no guarantees about the quality of the riders to the bikes i tune..I always treat them well with quality parts!
frank says:

Apr 1 2015 at 1:52 pm

@wilburrox

I have NO IDEA where to post this… PLEASE TELL ME THIS IS SOME KIND OF APRIL FOOLS JOKE. Early this am I receive an email from Trek saying they’ve teamed up with Fabian to create Monument, a grand show of olfactory prestige, with top notes of Arenberg cobblestone. Years of development. A new fragrance for champions. I’ve waited all week for right time to use the word of the week: FUCKBALLS. If this is a real deal then wha la, Spartacus, he just jumped the shark ! If it’s an April Fools thing? Friggen classic. >>> Whether you’re laying down the hammer in the boardroom or on the Paterberg, Monument is the way to ensure your decisive victory <<< Oh man, please, please, please let this be an April Fools joke. It could be a really good one.

Solid, 24 carat gold.
frank says:

Apr 1 2015 at 2:06 pm

@Haldy

@frank

@Haldy

@frank

@Haldy

@PeakInTwoYears

When @frank gets back from the Keeper’s Tour we will have to wrestle his baby away from him and make that orange housing happen. I am sure it will need another thorough cleaning after crushing some souls across the fields of Flanders and Northern France.

Too much orange? Is that even possible? I’m willing to try; its only cables for fucks sake!

Too much orange..oh no, I don’t think so! I think it would look spectacular. I will order the appropriate supplies while you are laying down the V in the Holy Land.

Better be high-quality shit. I’ll bring the beers.

I’m slightly insulted you think I would put inferior quality on your steed. While I can make no guarantees about the quality of the riders to the bikes i tune..I always treat them well with quality parts!

Hey, setting expectations is not the same as flinging insults. Is that stuff compatible with Campa? I always strayed from the Shimano/Sram stuff for the road stable.

@KogaLover

Fortunately I have a picture of my bike as desktop wallpaper, so I can still stare at it while at work.

Btw: does anyone know where to get orange spacers to match the black V-cuffs? I tried a couple of LBS’s but none of them have them (not even in the Netherlands!). Any online site?

This is still my wallpapaer.

@max columbus

I do this all the time, which proves to be a huge distraction as well as making me late for where ever I am supposed to be. I looked up from my morning coffee a few hundred times to longingly admire my gleaming Hampsten MAX. Today is a good day…

I have it high on my list to get over to Steve's workshop and talk custom. So in love with those bikes.
frank says:

Apr 1 2015 at 2:08 pm

@Ron

I had forgotten what day it was when I got that email from Trek. I knew it was BS right away though, then I remembered it’s 4/1.

The selfie stick from Specialized…sorry, that whole craze is so fucking stupid I don’t even have the energy to laugh. Obesity and narcissism are going to be the modern health plagues that kill off humans in large numbers.

Yeah but the selfie stem puts a great note on that point, doesn't it? I thought that might have been the funniest of the lot, were it not for the "crushing it in the boardroom" remark which takes the cake.
frank says:

Apr 1 2015 at 2:13 pm

@wiscot

@KogaLover

Fortunately I have a picture of my bike as desktop wallpaper, so I can still stare at it while at work.

Btw: does anyone know where to get orange spacers to match the black V-cuffs? I tried a couple of LBS’s but none of them have them (not even in the Netherlands!). Any online site?

I just went to a hobby supply store and bought some orange paint. Usually take a few coats but looks just fine when done.

Chris King makes orange spacers - Mango is a pretty close match to the V-Orange and is the color my hubs are.

http://chrisking.com/parts/spacers