Categories: Anatomy of a PhotoAwesome Belgian Guys

Anatomy of a Photo: Winter Sweat Box Ride

Sweat box riding has never looked so good.

I spent the entire winter doing morning Spanish Interval Sessions, wherein one dons all their winter riding kit (including wooly hat) before climbing aboard the turbo in a hopeless attempt to sweat themselves thin. The flaw in the method is less in its commitment and more in its lack of effectiveness, although the magnitude of the commitment feels a lot like effectiveness when you’re doing it. The irony is that the Spanish do it in an attempt to shed the water weight caused by the bloating effect of cortisone whereas I did it in an attempt to shed the weight caused by the effect of things like “food” and “alcohol”.

Unlike those wealthy Spanish riders and their fancy turbos, everyone knows that in Belgium¹, they can’t afford such luxuries. So instead of sitting in the basement sweat box to shed water weight, those poor Flemish riders are forced to wrap themselves in sleeping bags and Himalayan mountaineering mitts and set out on the snowy roads in order to break a sweat.

¹ I am guessing that these fellows are in fact Belgian. They could be any nationality, but “Belgian” feels right.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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Steve Trice says:

Jun 27 2016 at 8:22 am

Whatever the main reason for having the boot up, surely the prevention of an Ullrichian rear windscreen face plant, in the event of an unexpectedly sudden stop, is a happy bi-product.
wiscot says:

Jun 27 2016 at 8:40 am

I'd imagine the four riders are riding as close as possible to the vehicle (and man, are they close!) because they a) want what ever shelter said vehicle offers, and b) to avoid breathing in the toxic fumes from the engine. You know that vehicle's likely running on fully leaded gas. Think Trabant (or whatever the Polish equivalent was.)
Buck Rogers says:

Jun 27 2016 at 11:33 am

Reminds me of some soldiers that I had that tried to train their bodies to work and function in a state of dehydration. "Doc, if we stay constantly dehydrated then we'll adapt and be stronger in the future." No, you'll end up with rhabdo and kidney failure.

While there is an argument to be made in recognizing dehydration there is none in trying to keep your body constantly dehydrated so that it will "adapt" to that state!

Awesome lead photo! Time for a ride!
frank says:

Jun 27 2016 at 12:23 pm

@Lukasz

It’s Polish National Team training in winter 1980.

http://naszosie.pl/hpk/reprezentacja-polski/

Holy Merckx. Solid pull.
frank says:

Jun 27 2016 at 12:26 pm

@RobSandy

I thought this was going to be about the Scottish game ‘hot car’, where the occupants of a vehicle have to put on all their clothes and sit in the car with all the heaters on full and the windows shut (preferably on a hot day so this game probably has a very short season in Scotland), and…err…that’s it.

The Scots aren't a lively bunch when it comes to recreating, are they?
frank says:

Jun 27 2016 at 12:44 pm

@Steve Trice

Whatever the main reason for having the boot up, surely the prevention of an Ullrichian rear windscreen face plant, in the event of an unexpectedly sudden stop, is a happy bi-product.

Or Davis Phinney.
frank says:

Jun 27 2016 at 12:45 pm

@wiscot

I’d imagine the four riders are riding as close as possible to the vehicle (and man, are they close!) because they a) want what ever shelter said vehicle offers, and b) to avoid breathing in the toxic fumes from the engine. You know that vehicle’s likely running on fully leaded gas. Think Trabant (or whatever the Polish equivalent was.)

Or diesel!
Teocalli says:

Jun 27 2016 at 1:15 pm

@frank

@RobSandy

I thought this was going to be about the Scottish game ‘hot car’, where the occupants of a vehicle have to put on all their clothes and sit in the car with all the heaters on full and the windows shut (preferably on a hot day so this game probably has a very short season in Scotland), and…err…that’s it.

The Scots aren’t a lively bunch when it comes to recreating, are they?

In my experience the Scots can be a very lively bunch when recreating. Though I guess it depends on your definition of recreating.
litvi says:

Jun 27 2016 at 1:41 pm

@frank

@wiscot

I’d imagine the four riders are riding as close as possible to the vehicle (and man, are they close!) because they a) want what ever shelter said vehicle offers, and b) to avoid breathing in the toxic fumes from the engine. You know that vehicle’s likely running on fully leaded gas. Think Trabant (or whatever the Polish equivalent was.)

Or diesel!

Or vodka.