Categories: Anatomy of a Photo

Anatomy Of A Photo: The Last Chance Saloon

Bicycle racing is a strange beast. Some races are over before they’re even a third completed, any mystery of a victor negated by methodical displays of team riding and tactical strangulation of opponents. Other races are so hard to pick that to even attempt to is committing VSP suicide; yet still we pick. For three weeks out of the year, racing in France can be pretty predictable, yet for one day of the year it’s the most exciting time on the calendar. We don’t know who’s going to win that race until the end. Sure there are favorites, but those favorites can’t just sit there and control proceedings for six hours, let alone for three weeks. That’s the beauty of Spring Classic racing.

This hill, if you can call it a hill, more like a false flat, a little ramp, a gentle bump, is likely the final opportunity for he not wanting to contest a sprint, to get away and solo in, if any previous attacks on the cobbles haven’t stuck… this is the puncheur’s, the rouleur’s, last chance saloon. The better sprinter will wait until the very last moment to pounce upon his weakened prey, like a dentist on the savannah.

I don’t know who these two 80s studs are, actually, but I would hazard a guess that Monsieur Yellow is probably the lesser sprinter, especially if the knotted guns of M 101 are any indicator. Maybe the attack stuck, and M Yellow got to cruise to the line without stress, and blew kisses to the adoring masses, soaking it all in. Maybe 101 hung on for grim life on the last kilometres of the nondescript, straight road and came around late, winning by millimetres.

I really don’t know. And that’s how I like my racing.

Brett

Don't blame me

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  • I disagree with @Brendon O’Donoghue being declared correct.  It is Phil Anderson and Eddy Planckaert (likely from the '88 Ronde).

    Front rider: The orange bit on the bottom of the jersey is distinct to the TVM jersey. The KAS one was all yellow with blue sidebands. The bike color of the front rider is also a problem. KAS were using gold Vitus aluminum frames in 1988. It looks like the blue-white steel Zullo's of TVM to me.

    As for the rear rider, other photos of Paris-Roubaix in 1988 show Demol wearing Adidas shoes and not Sidi's. Planckaert wore Sidis. Plankaert also used toe clips and straps (seen in the photo) and Demol likely used the Adidas system of the time.

    Proof positive in the photos

    '88 Ronde - Anderson & Planckaert

    http://www.philanderson.com.au/wp-content/files/2010/03/Ronde-V-Flanders-90.jpg

    '88 Paris -Roubaix - Wegmuller & Demol

    http://www.pezcyclingnews.com/photos/interviews/demol/demol-roubaix2.jpg

  • @Clingon

    I wouldn’t write off @engine quite so fast.  Wegmuller wore #12 in the 1988 Roubaix. Looks a lot like the 1988 Ronde to me.

    See: https://youtu.be/ftCkvZCqOsk?t=102

    You may be right... in fact, you are right.

    That's fucked that article then...

  • I had long wanted to watch In Bruges. Most of my movie-viewing is on airplanes these days and In Bruges isn't exactly inflight entertainment fodder so I'd missed it. I suspect Emirates won't be showing Carol anytime soon...

    Anyway I noticed it was showing on one of the local movie channels so I recorded it. Little did I realise this channel followed local censorship rules against things like nudity and swearing.

    Imagine if you will watching In Bruges with all the swearing bleeped out. It was like being the sonar operator in Das Boot.

    The point where I gave up was where they are looking at one of the artworks in a church - is it Hieronymous Bosch? The small images of the naked sinners being tormented in hell, apparently acceptable in medieval Europe were deemed unacceptable in 21st century Dubai and had been pixellated to protect the public.

    I have since managed to view a less edited version.

  • @the Engine

    @frank

    @Brendan O’Donoghue@the Engine

    And the winner is, @Brendon O’Donoghue! That is unmistakably the final false flat into Roubaix. Also, what would a plastic Frittes box be doing in FLANDERS? Conspiracy for sure. (Many locals consider this part of France still to be Flanders.)

    Secondly, @L’Engine, I watched it again with the VMH right after returning from KT and then now that she’s in Africa again I’ve watched it once more.

    To wit, a good joke is funny no matter how many times you hear it

    “Two manky prostitutes and a racist dwarf”…genius…

    If I grew up on a farm - and was retarded - this might impress me. But I didn't, and I'm not, so it doesn't.

  • @Harminator

    “Keepers’ Tourette’s” – the tendency to cuss like a sailor whilst on KT.

    ...and then continue to do so uncontrollably for ever after. Including using the C word liberally.

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