Two means to the same end: Winning. Photo: @Bianchi Denti
Belgium has a host of great names, and not just for Cyclists. Riding past a farm equipment outlet or workshop after Keepers Tour 15 had been consigned to the history books, I was taken by the name Bart Vanacker so much that I commented to William that I was seriously considering changing my own handle to Bart. It’s just more… hard. And the fact that explaining j’mapelle Brett to the French or the Belge is an exercise in vowel movements considerably more tedious and painful than any constipated goings-on at the other end of the spectrum (an anagram of rectums, after all) seemed to make more than a bit of sense.
That would still leave the most un-Belgian surname of Kennedy, which unfortunately doesn’t end in a C or K or a combination thereof. Those letters make up probably 99% of Flandrien monickers, almost always tacked onto the end, just sitting there waiting to be joined and punctuated by an X. It’s a letter that’s more than a little maligned in the English language, but celebrated by the Flemish and in good supply. Sticking an X on an English name will either make it complete, or completely ridiculous.
Among the KT crew were a couple of perfect platforms to awesomise with the 24th letter. @harminator would soon become Rickx, and not just because of his tenacious, numerous and not-entirely futile attacks. He smashed the cobbles and climbed the bergs like Merckx. Frank easily was transformed into Strackx, not so much for his two-wheeled exploits but for the way he piloted the big white van on the motorways like a louder, taller and plainer-looking version of Ickx. International playboy, maybe, but not quite in the same league. Mikey became Micky because William couldn’t quite grasp the concept, so naturally he evolved into Mickx, a serendipitous hybrid of Merckx and Ickx.
Unfortunately, there seems very few avenues to successfully adding an X to my name, and changing it costs more than X amount of dollars. Best to leave Belgian Affirmations to real Belgians.
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I can't believe no one has decoded this ancient rune for what it really represents. Look at the form of the figure "X" - it's clearly a mirror image of the "V" at its bottommost point. A clear projection of hardman virtue and badge of cycling prowess. The Alpha and Omega of the Rules,- Five and Dime. It makes up the Velominati numeral 5 and 10 "V" and "VV", respectively. If written in Roman fashion it is written as "X". Certainly this is a sign from the Prophet.
Want some more proof of the power of "X" in cycling? Here's this:
When describing a gear ratio do you commonly see it printed as 53 X 11?
When abbreviating the word "cyclocross" do you use CX?
Campagnolo went to a 4-arm spider in the form of a cross, or "X"
Our machines are commonly regarded as "10 speeds" *(X-speeds) by the heathen unshaved masses.
Spoke lacing is described as 2-cross and 3-cross. (2X-3X)
"X' is the 24th letter in the English alphabet, and wheels are commonly drilled for 24 spokes.
Brothers and Sisters, the signs have been all around us.
Er, X is the 23rd letter.
Other than that, awesome.
Er, I'm a fuckwit who can't count. 24th letter it is indeed, of course. Please, carry on.
@Tugman
Holy shit. It's like the Star Wars moment in Human Traffic...
@Joe
Another motorsport fan, huh? I just read a Sam Posey article that said Ickx is one of the few drivers that "thrived on danger". So considering the period that he raced through, he's probably lucky to be alive!
I think his 1969 Le mans win in a 4 year old car was amazing, but helped by a lot of DNFs. However, as I'm a kiwi, to me he'll always be the driver who took advantage of Chris Amon's development skills to take Ferrari's first GP win for years in 1968, while Amon retired from race after race with bad luck. Apparently that brought Amon to tears.
Discovered just now How to X your name (http://martingarrixizer.com/ )
If you try to "garrixize" Eddy's name, it will become Edgar Mex
@KogaLover
Brilliant. I'm Brendon Kennex!
I get Ollie Brookex lololol
Eric deRockx, at your service. My legs feel stronger already...