I must admit to not having read most of the cycling memoirs in the Works. I may eventually but the local public library doesn’t carry any of them and never will so I’ll have to buy them or ask Frank to tote everything he has to Hawaii. I did get off my wallet and buy these two and it was money well spent. David Millar and Tyler Hamilton have produced two excellent cycling books, parallel stories in very general terms and times. The contrast of how two people in similar straits handle the truth and the divergent roads it puts them on is compelling.
Doping in professional cycling is still secretive enough that it is best told from someone all the way on the inside. Journalists will be lied to by cyclists. Federal grand juries do better at getting the truth but we usually don’t hear it. Cyclists who lived the lie and need to unburden themselves make a good conduit. I can’t begin to explain it as well as Tyler or David did; their inner world of professional cycling is nothing we hear much about. In the 1990s it was the wild west where the law was absent. Spanish “doctors”, syringes and mini-centrifuges ruled the day. It’s such a huge subject, too interwoven with passion and pressure, so much grey area. For a person like me who likes to talk about doping in black and white, I’ve learned how institutionalized and insidious it was (past tense, I hope). It’s not so simple. It’s tragic. To feed the young ambitious athlete into a system where there is no choice but to accept the drug system is criminal. When money is at stake and the UCI is complicit, as is team management, those are some criminals.
Racing Through the Dark-by David Millar. I’ll also admit to being a long time admirer of David Millar. He has always been well- spoken and not afraid to confront, two qualities I admire and personally lack, but they make a good writer. Millar is a military brat who found his cycling talent in the 10 mile British time trial club races. He ended up living his dream, riding on the Cofidis team, France’s well- funded but dysfunctional squad. He spent his first few years with Cofidis riding clean, yet watching how others “prepared”.
“In my youthful exuberance, I was telling anybody who would listen that I’d won in De Panne and broken the course record with a hematocrit of only 40 percent. I went to see Casagrande and his roommate, whom I refer to as L’Équipier (the teammate), so that I could show Casagrande the test results.
I stood there, a big grin on my face, expecting Casagrande to congratulate me and say something morale boosting. But he didn’t. After a pause, he handed the results back to me and then turned to speak to his roommate in Italian.
“Perché non é a cinquate?” Casagrande asked L’Équipier, puzzled, Why isn’t he at fifty?
No one talked about doping and no one talked about not doping. Eventually, after VDB self-destructed and Casagrande was busted, Millar became a team leader. And with that mantle came the responsibility to produce results, be a professional. And eventually he was implicated by a teammate, evidence was found, he was out of cycling, deeply in debt, and drinking his way to the bottom.
For some interesting video here is a recent Spanish documentary from the inner ring.
The Secret Race-by Tyler Hamilton and Daniel Coyle. Tyler Hamilton and I grew up in the same end of Massachusetts, he went to the same prep school @rob and I dropped out of, so I always felt slightly connected to him. So I was a fan boy and stood by his fantastic excuses for too long.
The whole wretched story of doping in cycling is right here. Tyler Hamilton cheated and lied for so long, it took until 2011 before he could tell his parents the truth. And despite his decade of lying, this book rings true. His reward was getting out from under the lie. I think he would have written the book for free just for the unburdening. He states many times the lightness of being after testimony and though he knows it’s very unlikely, hopes Lance can feel the same lightness that comes from telling the truth. This book is Tyler Hamilton’s story but it is closely linked to part of the Armstrong saga.
Like Millar, Hamilton was unaware of systemic drug use until he had joined the professional ranks. US Postal drugs were at first team- provided and paid for. Once you proved yourself as one of the best riders on the team, as someone who could help Lance win the Tour, you earned the right to use EPO. It is fascinating reading, it’s horrifying, it’s depressing. Most unsettling is Lance Armstrong’s behavior. There are many revelations regarding Armstrong’s psychotic need to win. I’ll share just this one.
Tyler was eased out of US Postal because he was too strong a rider and perceived as a threat to Armstrong. So Tyler left and signed with Phonak in 2004. There was a time trial up Mont Ventoux in the 2004 Dauphiné Libéré weeks before the Tour de France. Tyler beat Lance in the TT. Later during the Tour, Floyd Landis, who was still riding for US Postal rode along side Tyler.
“You need to know something”
I pulled in closer. Floyd’s Mennonite conscience was bothering him.
“Lance called the UCI on you,” he said. “He called Hien, after Ventoux. Said you guys and Mayo were on some new shit, told Hien to get on you. He knew they’d call call you in. He’s been talking shit nonstop. And I think it’s right that you know.”
This little story is amazing for many different reasons and the only good one is Floyd Landis telling it to Tyler. I’m guilty of saying some negative things about Floyd, mostly because he was such an idiot liar. But at a point, when he has nothing to gain and he has lost everything else and he starts telling the truth, he gains back my respect, just like Tyler Hamilton has.
I ended up reading these books one right after the other. As I said before, I recommend them both. David Millar is a better writer. He actually has more demons to battle than Hamilton so his story of redemption is inspiring. Tyler Hamilton’s story is more depraved (in a doping sense) but both books are important. A lot of people in cycling are now admitting to past deeds in very unspecific terms. These two authors are both shining lights into some dark corners and making the inevitability of drug use in cycling more human and understandable. Also, in reading these books back to back, it highlights the contrast in how these two people dealt with their fates.
Both had the bad luck to be nearly singled out as dopers when a large percent of the riders were dopers. Millar realized it was the doping that killed his passion for even riding a bike. He took no joy in his EPO-assisted victories, only a temporary satisfaction that the task at hand was completed. He decided to come clean and to become an advocate for clean racing and changing the corrupt system.
Hamilton could not admit to anyone but his wife (who already knew) that he had been a cheat. His lie was so crushing he couldn’t even see a way out. He then spent all his money and energy protecting the lie for years, for nothing, obviously. It was the threat of perjury in that finally broke open the dam. It’s a cruel lesson to learn; the truth will set you free, even if it takes forever.
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@Leroy WRT point three, while I pretty much agree in principle that a doper this year won't stop because of it next year, but something that I think has shifted is the cost/benefit ratio of doping has changed. It's probably something we won't be able to appreciate as a spectator, but I think this case will change how pros make their decisions over the course of their careers.
@Leroy That's exactly what I mean; several times I've clearly explained that these latest revelations have opened my eyes to the WHOLE DOPING CULTURE.
I knew it existed but, like many people, had no idea of the extent of it.
To be crystal clear, I am outraged by the whole deal, not just Armstrong's part in it.
I'm not blaming LA for the whole squalid doping morass by any means, and have never said so.
What I am blaming him for are the specifics of this case, which is really all I have to go on right now without testimony about other team leaders pressuring riders to dope or fuck off. You show me where Barry Bonds was using intimidation of witnesses, coercion into and enabling of drug use and I'll tell him to fuck off too.
If you tell me Ullrich, Jalabert, Pantani or Uncle Tom Cobbleigh was doing the things we are reading about right now I'll hate on them as well.
I'm not lauding anyone's honesty, although I do respect it to some extent. I agree entirely that these guys have profited majorly from their sins, but better late than never, as my Uncle Anatole used to say.
I think you are underestimating how important the USADA "witch hunt" was in revealing what might have been whispered about but wasn't known. It may even have been a personal crusade ( I tend to think it was) but that doesn't negate what was dragged out kicking and screaming into the light. I too feel sad that cycling is being hurt like this, but it had to happen sometime and perhaps the biggest star in the sport had to be the one to fall to really open the floodgates. Whether or not it changes anything remains to be seen.
lastly, I think you are arguing very oddly, as you don't seem able to take on board clear and unequivocal statements, and your own arguments seem to draw some very long bows, both about this Armstrong Affair and what people are saying about it.
My dander gets up when people argue at me without taking the time to actually read what I've said, and who draw inferences miles (sorry, kilometres) away from what I meant.
And because my dander is now officially up, I'll say that it is you who are being condescending, as you try to educate us about the world. I may have had a massive blind spot about Lance, but I'm not a complete idiot and I'm well aware of the behaviour of sociopaths and megalomaniacs...
@Leroy
I see what you did there: you got out the broad brush. I don't know what specifics you are thinking of for the others, but here is one example of what I am thinking of: after egg timer testified before the grand jury (not something he had a lot of choice about), LA sent some ominous and odious texts to Mrs. Eggtimer. Just my opinion, of course, but that sort of shit is stooping below gangster level.
@smithers
Best way to piss him off is chuck your Garmin in the back of your car...do his loop 2kph faster and post it!
@Leroy
I don't have time right now, but of course I care about clean racing. Which is why I've always wanted to see LA brought to justice. He was a kingpin, no doubt. I just don't think you understand the complexity of his involvement and influence, especially after Festina when the sport had a chance to change... he was instrumental in dragging it back to, or beyond, the bad days of the 90's.
And to say that the ATOC and Levi is more important than the Tour and Lance? That's a pretty, um, strange statement... and USADA failed us by doing their job and exposing this massive fraud? Come on, really?
Maybe I should've used 'misconceptions', because there are plenty of them in the beliefs outlined in your post.
@Oli sums it up pretty well.
@Oli
Fair enough... I think we basically agree on the root issues and just don't see the finer points (such as whether or not it had to come out to move on) from the same perspective. You can get pissy if you like, but I've done nothing remotely condescending and done nothing but share my OPINION. Nowhere have I said that your opinion was wrong but you, as well as several others, have repeatedly questioned my opinion and forced me to defend and expound upon my position. If you disagree... cool, that's every bit your right and you'll notice it was probably 20 posts or so back that I pretty clearly said we don't seem like we're going to change one another's minds so let's just agree to disagree. You're every bit as welcome to your opinion as I am to mine, let's just leave it at that and move on with our different opinions.
@brett
First off... I'm not saying that the Tour is less important than the AToC. What I'm saying is when you proclaim to be out to clean up cycling "for the future of the sport" but don't bother to test the biggest races currently falling under your jurisdiction, there's an obvious conflict there. We saw 'strange' dominence by RS in the 2011 AToC, and USADA failed to conduct a single doping control there... That's not a "misconception" that's a fact. You can disagree with my opinions but, there's no misconceptions anywhere in there. You say the USADA "exposed" this massive fraud... I say you'd have had to be a thick or a born fool to have not realized it was going on. We can go back and forth all day long and wind up calling each other assholes in seven different languages or we can be adults and realize that we have different opinions on this. Neither of us is more "right" than the other and, if you don't like my opinion... Honestly, I don't much give a shit... It's my opinion and I'm every bit as entitled to it as you are to believe Lance is the devil himself.
...so, for the third time, how about we all just move on with our different opinons.
@Deakus So true... I saw him rage on someone in the comment section of one of his rides because they took his KOM but their HR clearly showed they were driving.
@Leroy
Do I detect a note of condescension?
@brett
Nope... no more than you detected "misnomers" earlier.
... just for the record, THAT was condescending.