I didn’t want to climb the Eiger, I wanted to have climbed the Eiger.
– Jon Krakauer, Eiger Dreams
Gianni’s Take
This Cogal seemed like a good idea to Frank. Right up until he understood we had to be riding at 5:25am to meet up for espresso or muffins, or dense fuel omelette loaded with cheese and sausage (Peter only). This ride had been weighing heavily on my psyche for a long time and I needed to get it underway. I needed to have done the East Maui Loop. Long distances and climbing are two of the many weak points of my cycling. This was by no means the Too Much on 100 slog; the East Maui Loop was 50% the distance and 80% of the climbing.
Frank proclaimed he was going to do this cogal without fuel. Frank is other worldly. He is from Mars and I, evidently, am from some outer orbiting pussy planet. I had stuffed one of my rear pockets with Clif products. Hell yes, bonking is dumb and I didn’t need to add that to my list worries. Why would one propose such Rule #91 folly? To meet the Man with the Hammer, a confirmed date with him, to really get it square in the forehead? No, Mr. Body Dismorphia wants to lose weight. With tongue cleanly bitten off I mimed that it was a fine idea.
After a zero dark thirty start we met the other riders, most of whom had no idea what a Cogal was. They were just up for a day of riding through the many climates and geographies of the East Maui Loop, followed by pizza and beer gorging. Frank and I were the only East Loop virgins on this ride. @mauibike was our guide but with one road and no turns, he didn’t have to worry about us getting lost.
Everyone returned to their starting points. Frank suffered a non-fixable flat with five miles to go and had to call in the support truck. He will have to come back to finish this one. It was a hell of a ride. I’m glad to have done it. Everyone else treated it like an easy roll around session. Rob even added some climbing after dragging me along.
The beer and pizza made us whole again.
Frank’s Take
At a cozy 160km with and a few thousand meters of climbing, this ride has been given something of mythical status by Gianni ever since our first trip out to Maui a few years ago. Poor tarmac, dirt roads, loads of climbing, and heat all add their unique elements to Maui’s already unique climate.
Being a small island just big enough to have distinct climates in different areas, there is a tropical rainforest on the north and northeast sides of the island, desert in the south, and normal in the isthmus that runs between East and West Maui. That makes this ride the only ride I’ve ever been on that takes you through all these weather zones in one day. I’d experienced part of this when riding the Kaupo ride with my friend Dave Ezzy on our last trip, and I was thrilled at the chance to ride the whole thing.
Bad roads and peer pressure meant a last-minute change to clinchers, as the wheels I had brought were my Café Roubaix climbing wheels and it was (repeatedly) postulated that I might destroy them when introducing fat ass, carbon, and potholes. I scrambled to get tires and valve extenders sorted out and claimed the VMH’s Zipp 404s for the ride. This turned out to be a bad idea as the extender I bought sucked, and the inner tubes I repurposed from her wheels were old and cracked and destined to fail just prior to us completing the ride. You’ve never been doing this so long that you can’t learn a basic lesson: never change your equipment the night before an important ride.
I had a rough night; I stayed up late writing, and staying up late writing customarily requires ample portions of wine. When I finally got to sleep, it was soon interrupted by phone calls from work when the servers chose to fail. I was awake just long enough to realize how hung over I was going to feel in the morning and how few hours were left before the alarm would go off.
Hangover, no food, and coffee seemed like an excellent way to meet the Man with the Hammer, and though I brought a Clif bar and a few shots by way of escape chute should I need it, I was determined to run the tank empty. This endeavor was aided somewhat by losing a bidon on the Maui Pavé.
This is dragging on, so I’ll stop after making a few final points. First, this is an amazing ride and despite the pouring rain, was one of the most beautiful I’ve done – full stop. Second, riding from desert into rain forest is one of the coolest things you’ll ever do. Third – and this is mostly just for the islanders – that tarmac on the back end of the island is rough, but it is nothing like the Pavé of Northern France and Belgium.
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View Comments
@Winnipeg CycleChick
You are right, pondering is for pussies. Glad you enjoyed the video. In the end those goofy movies are more fun than a photo album but usually the best scenery is not shot riding with one hand on the bars. And maybe I should not curse so damn much on these videos? I have an outdated "Flip" video camera that easily whips in and out of a rear pocket so it's good for riding and shooting and if it fell in a giant puddle, it would not be a huge loss.
@PeakInTwoYears
In late breaking news - famous cycling website run by obsessives for obsessives causes man in Scotland to buy a copy of a satirical book about mountaineering written before he was born - the power of the interweb
@the Engine
'kin heck, I could have lent you my copy ! However, Imustreccomend One Man's Mountains by the late great Tom Patey for maximum climbing entertainment, all of it true as well. I shall LEND you my copy soon.
Hey, lets quit hijacking the east maui loop cogal report with scottish climbing dits eh ?
@strathlubnaig
Agreed ready Tom Patey's stuff thirty years back and will now read again.
Back to cycling - got the Giordana back today - cycling porn although slight steerectile dysfunction caused by making my stem fit where the quill previously went - picture tomorrow if it stops raining.
The word "dits" reminds me Sailor Andrew must be home shortly
@the Engine
Dark Summit by Nick Heil - Worth reading twice!
Back on topic, I am now ceasing all mountaineering references, you a right, although it is off season this is overshadowing the keepers write up!
I'll throw one more read out there, and I'm covered since it's about cycling AND mountaineering: Kropp, Göran; David Lagercrantz (1997). Ultimate High: My Everest Odyssey. - Not the greatest tome in either cycling or climbing, it's a good adventure of a dude trying to go unsupported. The best bits are him cycling thru the Middle East.
That's pretty funny. I have been listening to Eiger Dreams (audio book) on training rides the last two days. A break from silence and/or music/podcasts.
On long solo rides to do mountain climbs, I often spool up a Krakauer audiobook (I've got them all). I don't do much climbing or anything (the non-bike kind) but the tales of adventure, even his book on Pat Tillman (don't watch sports other than cycling) connect somehow with the sense of adventure cycling brings.
Maybe.
I love the idea of riding through a whole bunch of vegetation / climatic zones in one day, be like a geography lesson in the saddle. I would worry about stopping too many times to take foties though !
@Gianni @ Frank and @Winnipeg and all others. Well done cogal, the media footage told the story. After the first few post i needed to go back and re-read it, just to make sure i did not miss anything. All of sudden it turned into a climbing post WTF i said to myself. Then it quickly hit me passion is what drives us and makes us who we are. Which also makes this site what it is. Keep it coming !
@Russ M
That is EXACTLY what I was just thinking