Categories: Cogals

International Cogal: Festum Prophetae

Artwork: @mcsqueak // Original photograph: Stephan Vanfleteren

It came to me in a moment of absolute clarity, the kind of clarity which only arrives to one in an oxygen-depleted state and at high speed – usually down a steep descent. It would be awfully nice to justify wearing my Molteni jersey, rather than having it hanging in my workshop all the time.

It had been suggested a few times already by the time the notion came to me last winter, that Velominati should organize an international Cogal on which all of us around the world would climb aboard our bicycles in honor of each other, and devote the day to riding. It is, after all, what we do; we ride our bikes. The rest is detail.

While the idea is simple enough, the selection of a date has proven positively futile. Summer on the Upper Half of the planet (you know the one – the one that matters) means VVinter for the Lower Half. When the Lower Half (you know the one, the one with all the convicts and Aztecs) is in summer, the important side is snowed in or sopping wet. You simply can’t choose a day that works for everyone.

The solution, of course, is simple: I unilaterally pick a date for the entire community and shove it down everyone’s throat by the virtue of being louder than almost anyone else (with the exception of the bloke sitting just behind me and to my left at the café; that is one loud-mouthed bastard, that.)

Being the type of person I am, with all the personality defects I have at my disposal, I was still perplexed by the selection of a date that holds significant meaning for all our community. January first, so we may ride off our hangovers. October 3rd, to celebrate Leiden’s liberty from the Spanish. Then the epiphany as I flew down Lighthouse Hill towards the shore of Puget Sound, where Pearl Jam and Sound Garden once rocked out in the weeds: the Velominati International Cogal will be held every year in honor of The Prophet’s birthday, June 17.

Every Velominatus is free to observe this day however they like. Take a holiday from work; declare an exemption due to your specific religious requirements. Ride on the day, in a way that helps you honor the way Eddy rode himself. Ride lots, was his sage training advice. I like to surprise my rivals, was his explanation attacking 70 or 80 or 90 or 100km from the finish. However you ride, on Festum Prophetae each year, we will honor The Prophet. We may also choose, as is customary with other holidays, to arrange within our immediate community to designate the nearest convenient day to observe the holiday. If taking the day to honor him is impractical on the 17th, designate a nearby day that works better for you.

Mark your calendars for June 17, Festum Prophetae*. Personally, I will climb aboard my steel Bike #2 fitted with tubular tires, don my wool Molteni Jersey and head out with only a bit of food in my jersey pocket and water in my bidon with the express intent to meet the Man with the Hammer. No mean feat, considering the Seattle Summer Cogal will have taken place only the day before. Two Cogals in one weekend: I can’t think of a better way to honor him.

Vive la Vie Velominatus.

*A special thanks to @ChrisO for helping determine the “correct” latin phrase.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @morten okbo

    So much attitude in that pic... the young fella on the left looks like he's ready to lay down some serious V!

    And is that @Chris O in the middle?

  • @Buck Rogers
    Try woolistic - they have some great wool gear.

    @brett

    @markpa

    @Ron Mt. Wellington & Hobart. Awesome. Tasmania is by far one of the awesomest places I've ever visited. If I was an Aussie I'd move there in a second. A few bikes, a VMH, a job that pays the bills...that would be a nice life.There's always n+1 to be sought but the rest are ticked off and it is indeed a nice life.

    If I ever move back to Aus, Hobart would definitely be a place I could live. (Cue a rabid Melbournian ranting about six fingered incest)...

    You actually expect us to say "No Bretto, in the hypothetical apocalypse that sees you returning to Australia, we want you to pick Melbourne!"? Hobart is most welcome to you.

  • So I went to the supermarket with SWMBO and tried to buy Fosters. I was hissed at, threatened with being locked out of the house if I bought it, and even though I helpfully pointed out I was a kiwi, and hence not genetically predisposed to die if I drank it, still had no hope in hell of actually picking any up, let alone buying it.
    This isn't a complete tragedy though, since I did buy beer that wasn't shit, since it was made in NZ.

  • @markpa
    Any idea who has the record for the ascent up Mt.Wellington?
    Richie Porte I thought had it, but then recall reading about a Tour of Tasmania some years ago when a young bloke named Cadel Evans smoked up there in under 40 minutes. One of the Sulzbergers might have a good time up there too, but reckon Matt Goss doesn't.

  • @Nate mine's already been ordered...I blame a bottle of wine & trying to distract myself from the Eurovision replay that was on TV before the Giro coverage started.

  • @Mikael Liddy

    @Nate

    @Buck Rogers

    @Mikael Liddy

    Sorry, that would be Rule #16 I was looking for

    Ahhhh, screw that, some rules are made to be broken if it is with the right spirit in mind. It is a day to honour The Prophet. I say wear 'em with pride, especially if i can find 150 bucks lying around and can manage to get one!

    They have a domestique version without the stripes.

    damn you to hell...that was the one thing holding me back!

    Damn! Yup, that seals the deal. Gotta get on now.

  • I'll be celebrating the first 8 hours of June 17 as the final 8 hours of my first 24-hour race. As I watch the sun come up, I'll think of everyone riding 'round the world for the simple sake of loving the bike. With good fortune and decent weather, I am hoping to do about 450 miles...errr...725km.

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