Motherfucker.

I honestly don’t like swearing in an Article, much less using such a word to open an article, but seriously. Motherfucker. A motor discovered in an U23 rider’s bike at the Cyclocross World Championships has to be the lowest of the low that anyone can go. I’m so pissed off, I’m rhyming. Which itself makes me madder than a hatter.

I have a pretty lenient stance on doping, which I hold to fairly wide criticism. I believe that the path towards doping is full of shadows and gradual steps towards the darkness. It is easy for me to imagine a young, ambitious rider who has sacrificed education and other vocations for the chance to become a Pro Cyclist, who is taken under the wing of an older, more experienced rider and to whom is explained the ways of the sport. If I was 18 and following that path, I cannot say with certainty what choice I would make, given the limited perspective one would have under those circumstances. While I hate doping and wish for clean sport, I hold limited judgement over those who have strayed down that path.

But we ride bicycles for the pleasure of propelling ourselves along the road under our own power. We push the pedals and we go faster, it is as simple as that; the motor resides in our heads and in our hearts. Performance enhancing drugs will, to various degrees, fine-tune and modify that motor, but there remains alive a notion that even a doped rider is holding true to this basic notion.

Competition is about finding out who is the superior athlete, it is as simple as that. We train, we fine-tune our equipment, we learn the strategy and tactics required to rise to the top. Doping certainly obscures that concept, but that a rider would abandon this fundamental principle of our sport by utilizing a motor in their bike seems to me an order of magnitude removed. It is gratuitous to the extent that there is no possible justification apart from an unabashed desire to win over all else.

This is bike racing, not motorcycle racing. For fucks sake.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • I got dropped on Turn 4 of  Alpe d'Huez  by a 60 year old fat broad on a E bike. I ain't been right ever since (Send EVERY doper/cheater a lifetime ban or this sport is dead).

  • @Haldy

    @Oli

    I’m not sure I hold that doping the bike is somehow worse than doping the body, but I do hold that it’s bullshit that it’s come to this sorry state where motors are being fitted…

    Having done a small amount of work on teams, the mechanic absolutely had to have known about the motor – that fucker should be banned too, along with her dad.

    The only, ONLY thing that makes the motor worse in my mind is this…even doped…the rider still has to put in the actual effort. YES..they are enhanced, and that is totally wrong, but they are still 100% making the effort. With a motor in the bike..that is no longer the case. They are making less effort than every other rider around them.

    Seconded. The rider - culpable. The owner of the bike - culpable. The mechanic - culpable. The parents - don't even get me started on the misguided path that must have led to two, TWO, of their children heading down this path.

  • If you aren't cheating, you aren't trying...  But putting a motor in your bike is a pretty dumb way to cheat. Way too easy to get caught.

  • @Ben

    "If you aren't cheating, you aren't trying."

     

    What utter bullshit. There are plenty of people trying and succeeding without resorting to cheating.

  • Why is the UCI is calling it "technological doping"?  Why are we PC'ing this to death already?

    A cheat is a cheat.  If you're going to accuse her of cheating, fucking do it.  Call her ass out, and don't pussyfoot around it.

    But if you aren't sure, say nothing until you have an indictable accusation.

    The middle ground is the domain of the coward, the 'allegedly,' and of the witch hunt.

    If you suspect wrongdoing, make sure.  Then burn the motherfucker down.

  • If there is any bright side, at least we gotten a new heinously bad excuse...

    I have this one friend who is always storing his extra cash in my wallet. It's kinda nice.

  • @Gopha

    Other articles keep mentioning Froome and Cancellara(I won’t accept that) but I couldn’t stop watching this video then and I can’t stop watching it now;

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ideiS-6gBAc

    I watched it several times. I'm no mechanical engineer, but if the rear wheel was being driven by a motor, wouldn't the bike have swung in the opposite direction?

  • @Ben

    If you aren’t cheating, you aren’t trying… But putting a motor in your bike is a pretty dumb way to cheat. Way too easy to get caught.

    Maybe you should watch a race or two. Then go up to a rider at the end who might very well be exhausted and say what you just said. Then prepare to try and stop the bleeding from your shattered nose.

Share
Published by
frank

Recent Posts

Anatomy of a Photo: Sock & Shoe Game

I know as well as any of you that I've been checked out lately, kind…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s World Championship Road Race 2017

Peter Sagan has undergone quite the transformation over the years; starting as a brash and…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Women’s World Championship Road Race 2017

The Women's road race has to be my favorite one-day road race after Paris-Roubaix and…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Vuelta a España 2017

Holy fuckballs. I've never been this late ever on a VSP. I mean, I've missed…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Clasica Ciclista San Sebastian 2017

This week we are currently in is the most boring week of the year. After…

7 years ago

Route Finding

I have memories of my life before Cycling, but as the years wear slowly on…

7 years ago