We want to look like Pros, sure, but what we’re really after is feeling Pro. All the aesthetics are just a tool we use to fuel the fickle internal combustion engine of Morale. In the end, there is little that will make you feel Pro more than clattering along a stretch of cobbles in a small group; instant “select breakaway”. One of the magical things about the cobbles is the risk of crashing is always there, so your adrenaline is always pumping. The other magical thing about the cobbles is that you have to ride them full gas to smooth them out, which means you have the combination of bombing along a tooth-rattling road at full gas with adrenaline coursing through your veins like it’s New York in 1984. And then Johan Museeuw blows by in the gutter and now it’s a real party.
The most Pro you’ll ever feel, however, is clattering along the cobbles, feeling your back rim start to hit the stones and realize the worst: you’ve got a flat. You don’t have any tools; in fact you have nothing in your pockets at all. But fear not, you just swing off, do a cyclocross dismount while reaching for you back QR skewer which you unlatch right as your second foot hits the ground. A snap of the seatpost and the wheel comes loose. You hold it up in the air and the support van screeches to a halt as the mechanic jumps out with a fresh wheel. Moments later, you’re back on the street, in the non-prostitute sense.
This is Keepers Tour: Cobbled Classics. I’ve never had a flat on the cobbles, but I’ve seen it enough first-hand to attest to the above scenario. I also recognize that due to my hubris in mentioning the scenario, I will experience it firsthand this year.
Keepers Tour is back for 2015; based out of our Gite outside Lille, we’ll be crushing cobbles and watching the best races of the year in dust-covered front-row seats. Roubaix, Flanders, Wevelgem, we ride them all. Roubaix, Flanders, Scheldeprijs, we watch them all. This is an amazing time of year to be a Cyclist, and it’s the most magical time to be a Cyclist in Belgium. Our trip is 100% all-inclusive; get yourself to Lille and you will not need to spend a dime until you’re back in Lille nine days later.
The provisional agenda is below. Changes will likely be made but the basic agenda of major events will stay intact. All-inclusive cost for the full 9-Day Keepers Tour: Cobbled Classics 2015 is €3,250. A 50% deposit will be collected in January, with the balance due upon arrival in Lille. Register on the Keepers Tour: Cobbled Classics 2015 event page.
I know as well as any of you that I've been checked out lately, kind…
Peter Sagan has undergone quite the transformation over the years; starting as a brash and…
The Women's road race has to be my favorite one-day road race after Paris-Roubaix and…
Holy fuckballs. I've never been this late ever on a VSP. I mean, I've missed…
This week we are currently in is the most boring week of the year. After…
I have memories of my life before Cycling, but as the years wear slowly on…
View Comments
@Mike Hunn
Need I go on?
@brett
Be careful here. Alex may have already ridden P-R on a cast iron penny-farthing.
It's not like one changes gears on the P-R stones. You find a decently big gear you can turn over and just hammer. And coasting is dangerous. Hmmmm, still, there must be decent upstanding reasons why a fixie should never see the P-R course.
@Gianni
Alex may well have done it on a penny-farthing and a hundred year old fixie but I also remember William saying that Alex's legs scare him.
@Chris
Alex = Alex. Mikey = Mikey. Case closed.
Cobble inspiration from LeMan...
http://41.media.tumblr.com/9916f8c158145daedd13d6bfe5b1de8d/tumblr_ng89jvmJF21rqu9lbo1_1280.jpg
@sthilzy
Ummm...isn't that Gilbert Duclos-Lasalle?
@Haldy opps
Look at the state of those cobbles!
That's a great photo.
@Harminator
No gutter to utilise there!
@Haldy
That has got to be one of the most terrifying sights for a pro: riding PR where, on the stones, the viable options for riding are few and far between, only to see a bunch of mugs blocking your way. What to do? Move to a different part of the road? Hardly feasible. Slow down and brake? Hardly feasible. Ride into the fuckers and risk crashing? Hardly feasible. Time to mentally compute options? Milliseconds.