Rule #28: “White is old school cool. Black is cool too, but were given a bad image by a Texan whose were too long. If you feel you must go colored, make sure they damn well match your kit.”
You bet white is old school and for good reason, it is the only color of cycling socks that is truly acceptable. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, what color did Merckx wear? What color did Jesus wear in his all-too-short cycling career, Kelly, Coppi, Rik Van Steenbergen, Rik Van Looy, I could go on and on. Not one of them have worn anything but white socks. Years back, black shorts were a regulation of the cyclist’s uniform. It may have not occurred to people to try other colors but black shorts were the only allowed color. Perhaps white socks fell under the same regulations; I’ll let @Oli answer that question. Black socks, god damn it people, are not cool, maybe on a mountain bike while getting wicked air, but not in the world of road riding.
I’m obviously outnumbered by the other Keepers here or the Rule would be three words, “Socks are white.” Every one of the Keeper’s executive board meetings seems to end with me drunkenly banging the table, paraphrasing Bones, “In the name of humanity, Jim, Rule #28 must be revised,” as I slowly slide off my chair and disappear under the table into a puddle of my own sick.
Only in the last fifteen years have the standards been lowered and now it’s a total confusion of bad taste. Again I implore the jury, have we no pride in our guns? A tanned, shaved, well-honed gun can only be properly punctuated by a white sock. Granted the sock pool has become so fouled it’s nearly impossible to even find all-white socks so I won’t be an absolutists (cognoscenti?) but please, mostly white. I won’t even argue length, I find tall socks (Wiggo tall) an abomination but I guess that shows how damn old I am.
Let’s reverse the trend. We have wasted too much energy worrying about podium caps when not many of us are on the podium yet each and every day we ride we make a decision about our socks. If you want to look Pro, get in the know, have a sack, don’t wear black. Write your local Keeper and make your position known.
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@michael
fk he's fat would be my opener.
@Gianni , you are a purist of the highest order. Our sport, our method, our very way depends on those like you who stand up for what is right and just.
@Gianni
Bravo Gianni. And I believe that the spats being sported by the carabiniero in Exhibit A also support your argument.
@Steampunk
Agreed. How can anyone argue with that?
Man, what f'king amazing trunks.
Back in the Day training manuals covered wearing kit in better terms than those new training books you get now.
@huffalotpuffalot
I would chuck stones but, ah, well when you see him in civvies he's a f'ken midget. That and I'm getting my arse handed to me by kids on those teeter totter walky bike things right now so I have no grounds on which to complain.
I've never liked matching the entire kit to whatever jersey the rider holds that much, with the recent exception of Tommy V cos that was fucking awesome. If you were going to try and mug him for it he'd have grown a third limb to stop you.
@Chipomarc
Well done, old boy, well done.
White socks white sock white socks. Agree completely. Except in Rule 9 conditions, when wearing white socks means buying new ones. Especially when wearing the White Ladies, it's a really bugger to find a white enough sock. I have socks that I ride only in good weather, on clean roads. Other socks that have already been besmirched and have lost their crispness before that I'll wear when it's mostly dry but I expect some upspray from the roads.
But on days like today, when I rode for 5 and half hours in a mix of rain, wet roads, and roads with so much rotting leaf jizz on it that I actually had to stop once and pull a rotty leaf puck out of my front fork because it was like riding with the brakes on.
@G'phant
While also in complete and total support of standards, this is a natural problem you have when establishing them.
Back in the late '90's, I started a site for artists somewhat similar in spirit, now that I think of it, to Velominati. It was called "Control Freak" and the byline was, "Control Freak: A term used by lazy people to describe someone with standards." I always liked that notion. Too bad some other company was already called Control Freak and they sued me. That sucked.
@Routier
Good call, except the answer is still white. And Barry, as much as I love the guy, has got to abandon the Shoe Kippah. What the fuck, dude. Shit or get off the pot. Belgain booties, no overshoes, overshoes - your call. Just not the little half cap. It's as bad as Cav's 3/4 sleeve skin suit.
Note: Nothing against the Kippah; I just don't think they belong on a shoe. I assume those of you of a Jewish nature agree.