It is so deeply entangled at this point, I can no longer tell the threads from one another. The strands once ran cleanly from one bicycle to the next, linking a discrete sequence of events, considerations, wants, and desires. But then, 15 years ago, a strong force entered my life and I was forced to find alternate means of justifying the acquisition of new machines and kit.
Finding a partner to spend your life with is an incredible experience; to discover the half of you that was missing and feel it join to its mate to become whole is something that defies description. But it doesn’t make buying another bike any easier. If your partner isn’t a Cyclist, there will be endless debating over ancillary details like explaining why already having a bike doesn’t preclude needing the machine in question, or why the existing stable can’t fulfill the purposes of the proposed new steed. Then – should the case have been made and the principle of the purchase agreed to – there will come the maddening discussions of budget and the prioritization of food or clothing over the bike. Suffice to say, being in a relationship with your life’s partner is worth it, but only just.
Partnering with a Cyclist is messier still. While food and clothing are quickly rank ordered at the bottom of the priority stack, there is the introduction of quantities of bicycles on the already-stretched budget. As the VMH happily supports and participates enthusiastically in the selection of wheels and kit, the knowledge will be creeping in that this acquisition only emboldens her for her own Rule #12 endeavors; n + 1 slips to n + 2.
It happened smoothly, without me noticing. Happy to have justified and gained budget approval for my original Bianchi EV2, I scoured the farthest reaches of the primordial Interwebs to stretch my budget to the maximum. I emerged from the other side with a full Dura-Ace 9-speed equipped racing machine, at which point I had no alternative but to accept that her steel Bianchi needed more than fresh bar tape in order to stand up against my lovely new steed.
She approved her own budget (I hold a seat on the finance committee but do not have a controlling vote) and emerged from a much shorter process with a Camapa Record 10spd equipped EV4. That’s two EV’s more than mine. Her superior machine meant that I had room to make upgrades while flying unnoticed under the radar; lighter wheels, better pedals, saddles, and stems flowed on and off my prized EV2 for several years until finally she had to admit I was due for a more substantial upgrade.
I have found, through this process, that the secret to a happy partnership is to keep the VMH in a slightly better bike than mine at all times. My upgrades stay one step behind, which gives me room to fiddle with my kit while her machines jump in leaps and bounds. Should I find myself unable to justify my own new upgrades, I approach the Committee with the suggestion that she requires an upgrade – a proposal which is approved without exception or opposition. She always lays claim to the best and lightest machines and I get to build and kit out twice as many nice bikes.
I know I’m not the only one taking this approach; Gianni’s VMH got a full Carbone climbing rig and months later he was throwing a leg over his own new steed. My mom recently acquired a 6.5 kilo Redline gravel machine which I’m sure will precede my dad’s next bike. Keeper Jim kitted his wife Jess out with a beautiful carbone rig only to Twitter his way into his own a short time later. All the more reason to marry a Cyclist.
Oh, the web we weave. And if any of you even mentions the word “tandem”, I’m banning you for a week.
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I could deal with the ban, but at the dirty40 this past weekend, there was a couple on a titanium tandem. It was pretty sweet.
Nice article Frank, having a better bike than your partner is tandemount to inequality, right there.
(I hold a seat on the finance committee but do not have a controlling vote) - I think we are in the same position - i currently have 3 1/2 bikes - 2 fully built up - 1 all trying to get built up from old parts that wil become a town bike and my new custom steel frame (hanging at the ceiling to remind her that i need to complete it) - which still lacks a new 11 speed groupset ( I still have a pair of 50mm carbons which is in rotation with the other bikes.
All of which makes me slightly grateful that my wife is simply the finance committee chair and not a VMH. I'm not sure my head could deal with the complications.
Rule #12 issues could certainly come up for my two young boys as they grow.
Oh how I envy you all.. My wife the runner. I purchased her a evo six dura ace nice bike. It started out simple enough. As the year went on we rode together along the coast. Times were good. Being an athlete her entire life, made her look like a natural on the bike.
As we moved to the foot hills She began to ask whats so hard about this. As she set right on my wheel. So now to the Mountains I thought! Now I will show her. Wrong she rode like she was a pro cyclist.
Now her first century. She completed it with a bit of complaining. it was complete with 30 mph head winds. We were having fun right?
Now six months later. No you go ride with the club, I will just go for a run.
Hey wife I found this great deal on a new bike, what do you think...trade mine in she says. I think, is this a trick? this can't be, can it?
But I am smarter than this right..so off I go and come home with my new bike.. Did you trade mine in why no. Then we would not be able to ride together.
So a month goes by...Hey Rob she said. I sold my bike to one of the women in your cycling club. What! and what did you do with the money? How much did you get for it? I guess I should have told her how much a good bike can cost..
So now at least once a week I see her old bike with another women on it....and that woman looks at me and knows she got a great deal on that bike.
And whats the wife doing now days.. Running. she says bikes are to expensive for her. But you go ahead and get what you need..as long as it is no more expensive than a pair of running shoes......I give up.
I would like another bike. I purchased my first bike last year - a very nice and relatively modestly equipped road bike - carbon frame and shimano 105 bits and bobs. Since then I've spent on a proper set of wheels, better tires and various accessories - to the point where there is little in the way of a logical argument for investing more into it.
The bike is really good, serves me beautifully, adheres to the principle of silence and in no way stands between myself and better results. So, while I've always thought that I'd upgrade this bike within two years I'm now starting to think differently. One thing that changed my thinking was having rented a bike that lives a rung up the ladder from mine - better frame and Ultegra components - meh, the difference was negligible. I realized that my next road bike was going to be an elite level bike - DuraAce or Campy equipped exotica deserving of a multi year infatuation and courting ritual to really whip myself up into a lustful frenzy (sorry, got a little carried away there...).
Instead, I'm thinking about a mountain bike as a short term fix. Something that I can go out and ride with my kids. Something that I can take on trails with the new dog that we're going to be getting in 8 weeks - the Hungarian Vizsla that everyone says needs to run and run and run! Something that I can ride in the long winter months here in Toronto.
I know nothing about mountain bikes but I'm thinking 29er and hardtail is the starting point?
That photo scared me. I feared it was a Cogal shot and there was a crazy subset of Cogal riders out there showing a pant-load of seatpost. Whew, no, just the Strack stable. I feel better.
@Gianni
I didn't put it together till just now...when I saw the pic I thought..."well, I guess Frank's bike isn't that much of an oddity afterall - look at all those fellows riding bikes that look equally as...unique".
@Weldertron
was it a Seven? Stoker in blonde pigtails? That would be John and Pamela, both hard as nails and quite possibly the nicest people you will ever run across. He is actually on the inside back cover of Rouleur issue 41 this month. What was your impression of the Dirty40? I was at work so wasnt able to attend..
@Gianni I thought the same thing...perhaps a candid moment from the V-V Cogal. I now feel slightly less short knowing they all live in the same garage. Did Buck get you the West Point details yet?
"Happy Wife, Happy Life" or so Ive heard(no actual experience)