Pity our cyclist, it’s Saturday and he won’t shave his face, it might sap his strength but he has to shave his legs or he won’t look serious. He certainly can’t have sex, more strength stealing there, and kissing his wife, whoa, slow down, that could spread some germs. He doesn’t want to get sick so going to that birthday party tonight, that could be dangerous, crap fattening food on platters, touched by possibly sick people, and standing around, no way, think of the guns. Who can drink alcohol before racing anyway? I need some steak and pasta. Darling, I’ll go to your office Christmas party, I promise, if I can sit with my legs up a bit, and take the elevator up to the office on the second floor.
A little browse around the town center Saturday evening instead, can’t do that. That would require walking and standing. I’m an athlete, damn it. And this talk of going to the pool, basta! Every cyclist knows swimming is bad for the legs.
Pre-race Sunday morning breakfast- this oatmeal could stand some butter and maple syrup. In the name of Merckx, non-fat milk please and what part of high glycemic index don’t you understand? Oatmeal, does that contain gluten?
Our cyclist rolls with two teammates to the race. In the car all the talk is pre-race excuses: I’m too heavy, I might be getting sick, my legs are unbalanced (?!), I drank too much coffee, I stopped drinking coffee, I have too much inflammation in my body.
Cycling mythology never dies. In a world were we still can’t predict the day when we will have great legs, there are still a thousand things out there that will give us not-great legs, and I’m pretty sure it’s all crap. Having just read this amazing interview with Freddy Maertens (thanks @pistard), it’s plain what gives you great legs, train like a bastard. And by bastard I mean back to back to back to back 300 km training days. Only professionals need do this, or can do this (who has the time or will?). That, get a lot of sleep and eat well, that is what a professional from Freddy’s day might tell you. No one was losing sleep over their power to weight ratio, no Pros then looked like Chris Froome now. These passistas looked like guys you wouldn’t want to meet in a dark alley.
Now cyclists train smarter, watt meters and training coaches, weight rooms and soy milk, skinnier and colder. Is there a professional now who just scoffs at such data and just trains long and hard? Look at the legs of riders in the 1970s, almost no one looks like that now and it’s not drugs that did that. It’s unholy training in big gears, some V in the bidon, repeat tomorrow.
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@Buck Rogers when I was in Nepal on of the leading sherpas lit up on the Everest summit as a publicity stunt for one of the local cigarette companies.
Great article Gianni. Years ago I read somewhere, can't remember where or who said it, but it stuck with me; "cyclists never eat cucumber, it's bad for the legs". It never said why it is bad, but fucked if I ate cucumber for a good few years after that. Didn't help.
@Rom
I was in a convenience store last week and spotted a new addition the the malt liquor scene. Amongst the talls on ice was...a 25 oz. tall, with the 1 oz. top portion of the can colored read to highlight to whole free ounce you were getting, still for $1.41.
Ya got yer 24, yer quart (32), and then the big boy 40. And now, you have a 25th.
@Nate
That might have been a publicity stunt but this Dude was legit. He always smokes.
But this guy is also world class. He has summited Everest, I think, seven times now. He is a good friend of my Climbing mentor Geoff Tabin and when Geoff heard that I was going to attempt Ama Dablam with just a single other climbing friend of mine he kind of freaked out and talked Nema into joining us. The funny thing was was that Nema could haul loads over 20,000 all day but he could not follow a technical vertical ice pitch that we did on Imja Tse as a warm up climb prior to Ama Dablam.
I also double checked my journals and Camp 2 was at 19,800. I was just DYING there and he was humming and smoking and melting ice. Truly just a different world!
@Blake
Thank you. I'm glad someone around here is at the ready with a calculator.
OK, here is another take, I don't think it's a drug issue, I think the answer is in Freddy's interview. Back in his day, everyone had to do all the races. Now some skinny streak-o-piss like Froomy can avoid the spring classics and focus on climbing-centric grand tours. He can pick his fights. He can get his power to weight ratio way up and climb like a fiend. If he rode P-R, chances are he would get shelled, his P/W might be great but his max power might not be so great and P-R is technique and max power.
@Buck Rogers
Are you shitting me? Ama Dablam at 18,000'? Did you make it to the top of that beauty? I am not worthy.
@Gianni Yes, it is an absolutely stunning mountain that tops out just over 6,800 meters. There were ten expeditions on it in the Spring of 2000 when I was there with my partner Jeff Clapp. 8 had quit without reaching Camp 3 when we arrived. We followed their fixed ropes into Camp 2 and fixed and pushed into Camp 3, which is on the hanging glacier you can see on the ~7,000 foot vertical face in your picture (the Dablam, i.e charm box of the mother, i.e. Ama ergo Ama Dablam is mother's charm box).
Crazy story but no, we did not summit. We got into Camp 3, ~21,000 feet and dumped our loads and started rapping down the fixed lines to Camp 2 (which lies over the ridge to the right in your photo from our view) and then about 25% of Camp 3, the hanging glacier, broke off and fell down the 7,000 foot face to the base camp area. Pure luck, or the Will of God, that we were not there. We had left less than one hour prior. No doubt at least one of the four of us (we had a Dave Penny join our group-a pro guide from Colorado, after his entire guided, paying group quit upon reaching base camp and actually seeing the mountain up close--definitely not for the faint of heart) would have been killed.
We packed it in and headed home. A Russian team did manage to summit that year but only three members of their team made it and one lost his hand and some of his other hand's fingers on the climb.
That was my last Big Mountain as my VMH shortly afterward became pregnant and I vowed not to leave any kids without a father until at least after they graduated high school. There is definitely an 8,000 meter mountain in my future, just have to wait 13 years until the youngest graduates high school!
@Buck Rogers
OK, you are more insane than I realized.
Who wants to play Caption The Off-Season Training Camp Activity Photograph game?