Look Pro, Part IX: Proper Cycling Caps
Rule #22 is perhaps the most complicated Rule amongst the (currently) 85. Part of the complexity springs from the fact that we are all very attached to this small cotton cap. Off the bike, it was once a badge used to recognize one of our own; now it has been taken over by the hipster crowd which subsequently ruined it for those of us who wore this hallowed garment with pride. Our response has been to refrain from wearing this garment off the bike and resort to other badges – such as Rule #33 compliance – to identify our own. That said, some of us, in the spirit of Rage Against the Machine, refuse to lay down arms and are fighting to take the power back and callously wear our caps regardless. (Guilty.)
Further complexity is due to its provisioning one to wear a cap during any activity directly related to cycling; maintaining your machine, while kitting up, placed jauntily askew while consuming a post-ride recovery beverage at your favorite watering hole. We’ve deliberately refrained from laying out a clear definition as to what constitutes a cycling-related activity, but the verbose description should give you a feel of the spirit within which to govern this Rule.
What The Rules don’t touch on at all is what type of cap is acceptable and precisely how it may be worn. This small, simple garment is at least as complex as a pair of bib shorts or a jersey, and just as with those items, there is a Pro way to wear them, and a noob way to wear them. Especially in light of a recent rash of non-compliant caps coming onto the market, I thought it as good a time as any to outline the definition of a proper cap and how to wear it.
- The material. A proper cycling cap is made of cotton, and is as cheaply made as possible. They used to cost a few dollars. That’s like a nickel in dollOZ. Now they are upwards of $15 or $20. A small strip of elastic should be somewhat carelessly sewn together at the back. A good cap should have almost no quality-control in its making, leading to each cap having its own size or positioning of panels. Each cap has its unique character and should be carefully chosen based on it. There has been a recent slew of new caps (made by both Pearl Izumi and some by our beloved Castelli) that have a sweatband sewn into the cap. This is strictly forbidden.
- The visor. This is the most important part. Visors should be short. This is because the purpose of a cap is to be worn while riding, and when the head is tipped down as you move to the V-Locus, you need to be able to see up the road to where the guns will detonate without tilting your head up in order to see past the visor. As with the above, a new wave of caps (again by Pearl Izumi and Castelli) have been made with a too-long visor. These visors are also strictly forbidden in general and for wearing under the helmet in particular.
- The Three-Point System always applies. Especially when worn without a helmet in pre or post-ride activities. No exceptions here; forward or backward, just always, always, always follow this system.
- Worn under the helmet, the helmet and cap must form a cohesive unit. Start with the cap, and slide it down over the back of the head to the nape of the neck. Then pull the visor down towards the eyes until the bottom edge of the visor is just above the eyebrows. Smooth out the wrinkles in the cap, as those will feel weird under the helmet. Next, the helmet goes on with the front of the helmet pushed down snug towards the visor of the cap. If part of the visor disappears under the helmet, you’ve gone too far, and if any part of the front of the cap shows, you haven’t gone far enough.
- Visors can be flipped up, especially when worn backwards. Worn forward, it is better to keep the visor down, especially under a helmet. If for some reason it must be flipped up, keep the bottom line of the cap low to the eyebrows. If it is being flipped up under a helmet, it helps an awful lot if you’re also in the midst of riding to a win in a Monument, your name starts with Phillipe and ends with Gilbert, or both.
@brett
Oh dear, I appear to have touched your front bottom.
@Marko
I assume then that wearing a W.C. cap signed by The Prophet such as this one on ebay currently,
while giving unfathomable quantities of inspiration while laying down The V (even more than even the V-Kit shorts?), would be sacrilegious as your sweat would undoubtedly ruin the sacred item. I can only infer that an un-autographed version of the same cap would be acceptable under your logic? BTW, in no way am I worthy of wearing the above pictured cap.
For my personal benefit and to help coordinate Rule #22 & Rule #8, I have seen a Merckx cap (red and black) with the traditional logo in the past and would like to get one to match my CHM, but an unable to find it again. Any ideas out there?
Seth
Great write up Frank.
I am a sucker for good and real caps. I have several, and its always confusing which one to grab when in season, which is not now as this summer heat is so stinking hot, a shaved head is too hot to ride in still. But in fall/winter/spring its alwasy proper to don the cap.
My fave is the vermarcs, belgian striped, white cap/black brim
I agree, someone should go to castelli and ask wtf are you thinking, you bring us so much other goods such as the invention of bibs et al, and now this. Can we have take backs in goods??? I mean give them a baseball bat w/those new caps. Merckx would have retaliated without a doubt.
Frank, i will send you an email, my mom is a seamstress, retired and has nothing to do, i bet she can make a cap to suit for notta
Dr. C – please tell me that’s just a little green man and not an indicator of your allegiance to some stuffy Catholic university in the middle of nowhere.
I have to say I’m up in the air on the fyxomatosis stuff. Some great photos, some incredible bikes, but is it Casually Deliberate or trying far too hard? I don’t know.
@G’phant
Actually, I love it! I giggle every time you bring it up. It probably deserves a guest post; that might be cathartic.
@Ron
Or one of those “rambling” clubs
@Ron
I’ve not clicked on the link, is it work safe? But it did strike me that if the girl in the picture above is representative, then the heels would suggest try hard over Casually Deliberate…
@frank
I maybe slightly squiffy at this point, but put me down for two! As for the rest of you, occasionally, perfection must be paid for with hard cash rather than through suffering, so HTFU, dig deep and pony up for a nice cap or two!
@brett
Awesome movie, Ben Kingsley oozes V.
Until this post I was blissfully unaware that any other sort of cycling cap existed, other than the Ur-cap described by Frank.
As a non-helmet wearer I actually use them quite a lot. Although sadly in Abu Dhabi they are not so practical. In more temperate climes the caps have a favourable effect of concentrating sweat and dripping it from the peak.
But here there is so much sweat it becomes a salty rivulet which blows back into the face and drips all over the headset. Not nice. I use a Buff, which draws the sweat back and allows it to evaporate.
I do wear my caps around though (and for cycling when in the UK) – hipsters are not such a problem here so I am unlikely to be mistaken for one.
I’d definitely be in for a couple of V caps.
@Chris
what are you doing Squiffy at this time of day – I thought you were in England – I presume you are in a different time zone coz I’m still at friggin work – bastad
@Ron
Just a little green man who likes to fight a lot – small man syndrome – misrepresents me completely, as I am a pacifist and only two months from peaking
Right, I’m off down to Ebay to get myself a cap for less than a Queen’s pound
BTW – is it a recognised method of salt replacement to eat one’s own hat?
@all
Either I’m being dimwitted (eminently possible after raging 1hr park session yesterday) but pic is of Barry Hoban – absolute hardman legend of british pro cycling, ex team-mate of Tommy Simpson and 6 time stage winner of the Tour de France.
Talking of being pissed – does this cycling lifestyle ruin your drinking legs – I can’t neck it like the proper Irishman I used to be anymore, without falling over and dying a thousand deaths the next day?
Just bought this one online (I know…) to wear…
and this one…
to burn
@Dr C – you’ve been neglecting critical aspects of your training. We are not pros, so being able to hammer 120k of cobbles before flinging ourselves up a brutal 20%, plaque crusher, is futile if the subsequent refreshment leaves you as weak as a floppy armed child for more of the same the next day.
Suffering in the real world needs to be more three dimensional. I recommend a lunch of potted pork products followed by at least three pints, an evening of intervals on the turbo whilst explaining to your wife why you will not be able to take her to dinner, followed by an night of predominantly guitar based music under the influence of substances not found on the WADA list. If the above is not sufficient, follow it with a 6AM reveille, a shot of napolitan style espresso and a series of punishing hill repeats.
Whatever you do, always end in the pub.
Slainte!
podium hats are MUCH worser than cycling caps, a flat billed skater hat (with the sticker on) might be better
but i do the shaved bald with no hat(no facial hair) and bushy eyebrows
even if bald guys look like dopers
@frank
Looks like Little Miss Molteni is confused. While wishing the Merckx bike was hers, I suspect her own bike is the single speed in the background – much more hipster/poseur appropriate. Also, while the bike is at rest, it shouldn’t have the chain in the largest rear sprocket as the right-hand down tube shifter would suggest. Unless she’s at the top of a very steep hill- which I doubt. Also, what are the chainrings on the Merckx? It’s not 52/42. Looks like 52/48 or something. The tubs look like they need some air too . . . Is it wrong to more interested in the bike than the girl? It’s a stunner, she’s just a stupid distraction.
@wiscot
that makes me feel a bit more normal for pointing out the shoes were inappropriate – cheers bro
@Joe
After that remarkably insightful appraisal of the matter, I think it is time to down tools, switch off this wretched PC and go get mullah’d – shall maybe even pic up a melton mowbray on the way home
Goddamn you if I pay dearly tomorrow as I am forced to stand in the rain entertaining my kids as my other half commits the ultimate sin and performs the swim/cycle/run circus act
Just found out that Fridays this month are team hat day. How bad a violation would it be to wear a cycling cap to work? I have last years saxo bank, leopard trek and EE(basque team).
@Joe
I still say it’s Gianni.
If memory serves, the Raleigh fellow pictured above is wearing a yellow cap issued to the members of the team leading the team competition in the TDF. (Or was it the team of the GC leader?) Was a great visual in the days before helmets.
@wiscot
I agree with you actually; I was just looking for a lady wearing a cap and didn’t have time to keep searching, especially since the Merckx looked so good, I forgot there was a girl in the picture in the first place. Cheers.
@frank
I’ll make a committment to a couple caps. I know I have not ordered a V kit as of yet, but it is in the plans behind the new bike I am builing. I generally would not consider wearing any cap out of kit, but will make an exception for the V for the overall awesomeness of its philosophic statement.
@RedRanger
Yea, I got one of those 2. The visor is too floopy for my taste. Its ok though. My kit cap is a 53×11 Coffee made by Pace. Elastic is way to tight and pinches my head so I had to cut it up to get that comfortable fit. I really like the castelli hats my son wears.
@RedRanger
Dude, rock the Euskaltel-Euskadi cap! I have a soft spot for that team.
@Dr C
Nah, it’s called getting old. Or “getting your AARP card” in Cyclops-speak.
@mcsqueak
Haha. Yup thats the one I’m thinking about. Next Friday then.
@mcsqueak
Easy tiger – I resemble that remark!!
Quick bit of bev research ongoing
1. Magners – crispy, not quite Cornish enough, it’s Irish and will never be Rattlers, nice start though
2. Newcastle Brown Ale – I thought this was for down and outs – nuff said! – tasty
3. Speckled Hen – a bit hairy, though balding, bad aftertaste, rusty snatch – yeuchh
4. Black Sheep up next……
But already I’m feeilng a bit pissed – damn!
@Dr C
Ha!
They had Speckled Hen on draught at one of the local British pub here. I didn’t care for it much either.
Regarding that Fyxomatosis lass… I don’t care about her style or even care too much about bike that she’s riding even though it IS a rather nice bike… I just appreciate that she seems to have nice calves.
I don’t know how far 4 peaks is distributed but check em out if you come to AZ. It’s a brew pub in tempe. I brough a 12 pack home from my last trip up there.
@wiscot
Aha, True School. Good man.
A Faema cap from Lourdes and a Carrefour one thrown out from the caravan this year on the way to the Galibier. Cheers to my friend Mike for the scores.
Caps are definitely one of my many weird obsessions…these aren’t even all of them. :guilty:
@Oli
Hot Shit Oli!
I’ve just had flashbacks to 1986 when I used to train in that very Renault hat (had the headband too that I used to wear on the rollers), and though I didn’t have the DelTongo hat, I was riding a Blue Colnago Super with Yellow decals that from recollection (maybe false) the DelTongo team was riding then.
Ah, yoof.
@Oli: Axle Merckx man, thats a collection!!
I LOVE the Gan, 7-eleven, and that Mercier…CLASSIC!
Chapeau for having some freaking priorities…cause that takes time to stack up and get a pic!
This guy has it down I think.
@Erik
Awesome @Erik. And soon she’ll be yelling “Keep up, Dad!”.
Totally random, apologies, but just found this vid of le Petit Grimpeur doing some extra practice for next year’s tour – realised he can’t improve his TT, so he is going to sort his descending…
Andy downhill training run in Chile
@Ron
Fucken A Ron! Were you drinking when you posted this! Fuck em all!
@Dr C
I’ve been on holiday for a few days and have been ruminating on how Velominati interacts with the celebration of Festivus and the manly feats of strength.
@minion
You live in New Zealand and you have to go on holiday? Where? It’s pretty much all down hill from the paradise you live in, IMHO.
minion – At the beach with some friends, plus their gals, plus my VMH for a few days so my drinking schedule is very, very open. There is a good chance I’d had some beer in me prior to that post. But either way, that’s how I feel on this matter! I like cycling caps, they serve a purpose for me and not doing something you like because someone else is doing it is nearly as bad as doing something just to toss off a certain look, for some weird credibility.
Glad I’m not the only one feeling this way on this one!
Oli – Merckx!! What a collection. I’m not even going to list all the ones I think are awesome, far too many.
My most prized cap is a De Rosa one signed by The Man himself last year at the North American Handmade Bike Show. Hangs in the bedroom.
wiscot – Nope, not wrong at all! The bike is much, much nicer than the girl. That is my problem with that site & the photos – the girls are always just so so, but the bikes are great. I love bikes and good lookin’ gals, but I find them both to be a weird pairing, especially when posed. A pretty gal on her own bike riding? Awesome. Some kind-of-hot model posed with someone else’s bike? Eh.
@Jeff in PetroMetro
Yup. Visiting family up north, so it got warmer, sunnier and greener. It’s like Dante’s seven circles of hell in reverse.
@wiscot
@Ron
You two both clearly don’t get fyxo’s fotography…
The “look” of his models is part of the trick.
Maybe its a Melbourne thing. I can guess how he would respond to your comments though.
@Marcus
What I don’t “get” are the high heels and baggy knicks. If you’re going for a certain look with a model then why not go all in with the look. She’d look great in proper kit and cycling shoes. It’s as if the photog said “don’t have bike shorts, just wear these, close enough.” and the woman is all “oh no you don’t even ask me to take my heels off”. In general, I don’t really see the difference between a Hooters Nascar calendar and this. They both objectify the things a certain subculture adore. In our case it’s bicycles and women.
@Marko
It’s “art” – everyone sees different things.
careful you don’t go getting all Karolinka on us.
@Marcus
Yeah right, my post is like 8 paragraphs short for that.
@Marcus
Stay tuned, we’re interviewing the founder of Fyxo in the near future, just as soon as we pull our heads out of our asses here at Velominati HQ.
Cyclops = Idaho State Road Champion!!!
I can’t believe it. What an awesome 50th birthday present!
We were a combined class but they scored us separately. They combined us with the Masters C class – 35+ Cat 5, 45+ Cat 4, 55+ Open (the class that I raced in the crit a few weeks ago and got hosed by the sandbagging Cat 1). I was a little worried about the climb right at the start of the race but I was only gapped a little from the leaders at the top and me and a guy in the Masters C class (on another LOOK) worked together to chase back on (while pulling all the rest of my class with us). After the climb it was 40k of BIG rollers and I worked really hard to make sure I didn’t get gapped. I was even able to answer a few attacks. One by one there were only three of us Cat 5’s left in the lead group. Me against two skinny guys that looked to be in their mid 20’s. The big rollers were starting to take their toll on me but I just kept telling myself not to give up and don’t get gapped over the top. But then I started to recover and feel better and at one point there was a guy that had been dangling off the front and I thought if I could catch the other two Cat 5’s by surprise and attack hard and bridge up me and the dude off the front could work together since he was in the other class. I’ve alway been pretty defensive in my riding because I always consider myself as the weakest of the bunch but I launched my attack hard on a little rise. It was actually pretty cool hearing the chaos going on behind me as I sped away at over 55kph. I then settled down to about 45 kph and had just about caught the guy in front when we came to an intersection that we had to take a 90 dergee right at and there was a car coming down the other lane so I had to really get on the brakes and lost all my momentum. The Masters behind me had started to close as we approached another big roller so I just settled in for a pack slide and recovery. We got to another big roller and I was at my limit but I told myself not to give up (which is what I felt like doing) so I gave a little extra burst of V and passed one of the Cat 5’s and he went off the back.
That left me and one more Cat 5 with the lead group. The heat and rollers seemed to take a toll on the Masters too since we were slowing to about 27-28 kph and the other Cat 5 moved to the front so I got up there with him. But then I found myself boxed in and the Cat 5 jumped. I told the guys around me “Let me through because he’s in my class and I have to go after him” and they let me free – actually they let me pull everybody up to him. We had about 8k to go and there were little surges and responses by the Masters and me. Well, evidently the little surges were enough to make the last Cat 5 pop because we were cruising along and the race official (The copper Element in the top picture) rolls up next me and yells “Hey Ken!” Oh-oh, what did I do? I said “Yeah?” and he says “You’re the only one left in your group with the leaders.” “Really?” The problem was that the Master were jerking each other around and the pace was slowing and I was worried the other guy might chase back on so I took off again. This had the desired effect of having the Masters get their asses in gear and the pace was back up where I wanted it.
As we turned the corner for the finish line I knew I wasn’t going to get caught by the Cat 5 so I let the Masters sprint it out and I came across the line with my first victory salute. I’m so stoked. I get to wear the State Champion jersey and as I told Frank recently it’s all because Velominati.com made me start taking things serious. When you look and act pro you feel pro and ride like a (lot slower) pro. Thanks for all your support and encouragement!
@Cyclops
Nicely done! Happy birthday as well. btw I wouldnt mind seeing a picture of you sporting that new jersey.
@redranger
I guess I have to wait until they contact all the class winners and get sizes and then it’ll probably be about 6-8 weeks.
@Cyclops
well it sounds like you represented Velominati well. and that Look is sweet. keep up the hard work dude.