Rule #31 was conceived out of necessity, aesthetics and plain good taste. Seeing an oversized saddle bag hanging limply by velcro under a Flite, Arione or Regal just isn’t right. Frame pumps, while they undoubtedly do the finest job of inflating a tube, add nothing but bulk and clutter to the lines of a frame (and aren’t compatible with the majority of curvy, plastic frames prominent today). While a folded tubular held under the seat with a Christophe toe-strap may have been de riguer and kinda cool back in the day, running tubs nowadays is not only uncommon, but an exercise in futility should one ride on any road less smooth and glass-free than a baby’s bum. So you see, Rule #31 was a no-brainer.
But even this most important of Rules has its drawbacks; stuffing the three pockets of your jersey can leave you looking like the Hunchback of Notre Dame, albeit with the hunch on the lower back, and more akin to a series of tumours across the hips and lower spine. Not a pretty sight. My usual pocket-stuffing routine would entail a tube and tyre levers bundled together with a rubber band, stuffed in the middle pocket, with a mini pump accompanying it. The phone would go in the right hip pocket, along with a camera (if there were to be some photo ops along the route, or blatant bike porn shots) and gels and bars in the left. Any extraneous clothing shed en route (arm warmers, cap, gloves) would then be forced in wherever they would fit. If a jacket was required, then all hell would break loose.
But recently I happened by chance upon an item that has made my life, and my riding experience all the easier and clutter-free. Lezyne products were having a season launch of their new, cool gear, and everyone attending received a free gift; in my case, I was handed the Caddy Sack, a simple PVC pouch. Inside was a metal patch kit with glueless patches, and a pair of mini tyre levers. I took it with a degree of dismissal, thinking it would just end up in the pile of superfluous bike crap scattered around my house. But I decided I’d see how much I could load it up, and was surprised to find that it holds a veritable shitload of gear. There’s room aplenty for a tube, levers, patch kit, multi tool, card wallet and phone. But if I want to, I can easily ft in another tube, a bar or two and a couple of gels. And it fits with ease into the middle pocket of all my jerseys, especially the sweet V jersey which is always the go-to garment of choice. This leaves the two outside pockets with more room than ever for whatever the ride requires from the aforementioned list-of-crap-one-may-carry.
Sitting alongside the 31 Sack is always the best mini pump I’ve ever used, the Lezyne Pressure Drive M (for medium). Why is it the best? Just look at it! It’s sexy, yeah, but for such a small unit it packs plenty of air into each stroke, and I can get a geniune 100PSI into my tubes during any roadside repair. But the best feature is the flexible screw-in hose, which eliminates the chance of breaking off the screw-on end of Presta valves, as has happened to the best of us when vigourously hacking away with a fixed-head pump. C’mon, admit it, you’ve done it. No more chance of that with this little beauty. Quite simply, it rules (31 especially).
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You can fit 2 tubes and 2 CO2 cannisters plus a set of tyre levers into the smallest Spesh saddle bag. Buy it in black, cinch the velcro straps down tight, you hardly notice it. Leaves your pockets fee for food/gels, keys, phone, cash & card, assos rain jacket, plus room into which to discard shoe covers, knee warmers/arm warmers and gilet if required. Pragmatism dictates rule violation.
After some douchebag intentionally tried to run me into the curb this morning, I've decided I do indeed want a frame pump. One capable of smashing car windows and craniums.
All this talk about taking jackets and warmers and gloves for a bike ride in pockets seems like excessive catering. Seems like Paris with a dog and bag to accessorize and all the garrish over the topness. Can we aim for sleek and stylish? Maybe more riders should see themselves in windows as a self check? Either wear the stuff or leave it at home. Does the weather change that much in 2,3,4 hours?
Smiley face shoulder things= saddle bag
@nvvelominati
Yes. When I left for my ride this morning at 8.30 it was 36F, when I returned at 12.30 it was 57F.
@frank
@Oli Brooke-White
I'm with Oli in that it's absurd from the perspective of physics. At the same time, the pathetic psychology of the story contains more than a glimmer of truth.
@nvvelominati
It does here. I went for a ride a couple weeks ago that started at 12C. There was a tempurature inversion in the hills and along the ridgetop it was 21C. Tearing downhill into the bottom of the redwood canyons where the sun never shines it was 7-8C.
@Marko
I believe as a corollary to Rule 24 you are expressing tempurature in the wrong units.
@Nate. Thanks for that you are speaking my language.
@Nate
Well, absolutely - I hope no one lost sight of the fact we're talking about the merits of using a fucking saddlebag and what gear goes in what pockets. The whole concept is ridiculously absurd.
The question was, "Has anyone actually done / seen any empirical analysis of whether there are any adverse (or positive) physical effects of seatbags vs pockets (or vice versa) in terms of riding efficiency?" - Absurd or not, though, the physics is rock solid that it's more efficient to move weight to a more stable object. Whether it's a noticeable difference, well...now we're definitely getting into murky territory, but it's probably measurable if you had a good enough lab.
@Nate
I see your point but allow me to retort. My cycle computer has units in Km and does not have a thermometer (how lame would that be?) sure, I could convert F to C before posting but I'll let all my metric using brethren do the conversion if they're that interested. Thus Rule 24 was not breached and Rule 68 was also applied as I did not mention speed or distance (although I will say it was a higher average speed than stated in Rule 68 and nearly the distance).
Aside from it being high deer hunting season around here it is a fantastic and unseasonably warm time to ride. Last year during deer hunting season, some asshole actually twitched for his rifle and nearly drew a bead on me. I imagine to some bozo with buck fever a cyclist's pace may resemble that of a deer although nothing else bears a resemblance (except for the antlers on my helmet). Great ride today and I often wondered what other Velominati were pedaling along in their corners of the globe. Especially as I was riding Il Gruppo Progetto.
@Marko
Sounds like a nice ride. Impressions of the Progetto? Last we heard you had only done a 20-30 km shakedown ride.
Around here you are far more likely to come around a blind corner and get impaled by a 12-point buck just returning from eating someone's garden than you are to have a hunter draw a bead on you. Sounds like you need a safety-orange jersey for this time of year.