Guest Article: An Open Letter

Dear readers, let us take a break from the almighty Tour for a few minutes. I am the least qualified Velominatus to introduce an open letter concerning Strava as I’m too shame-based to post my rides to Strava. I have a Garmin on the bike for no particular reason, ok, maybe to occasionally see how fast I’m descending or to know the grade of the climb I’m presently suffering on. At some point it will ask me what should it do with all these weak-ass rides taking up Garmin memory. Oye.

@Artie has authored this open letter (our first?) and like the Rules themselves, @Artie is just trying to improve our cycling experience in this digital world. Thanks @Artie

VLVV, Gianni

Dear Keepers of the Cog and Curators of the Rules,

The Tour de France this year has had a few memorable moments. Cavendish moving behind only Merkx in Stage victories, Froome’s new descending style, and of course the bike-less sprint up Ventoux come to mind. But there has also been a subtler addition to my viewing this year. More and more cyclists in the peloton have been sharing their ride data on Strava. For example, scrolling down my Strava feed after a late afternoon ride, I now notice Greg Henderson’s data, and see that yesterday he was in fact descending like a madman, just as Rule #85 and Rule #93 implore him to do. This supplement to my Tour Digest bridges to a theme my friends and I have often discussed and I thought it time to share our thoughts.

Our over-connected world has reached a point, where the dubitability of any cycling accomplishment has become (almost) strictly correlated with that said accomplishment appearing on Strava. Did you climb Sa Calobra during an early spring training camp? Did you reach the summit of Galibier before your best friend? Did your race up Alpe d’Huez with such a murderous intent that locals began to talk about the ghost of Pantani that appeared one late August afternoon? Perhaps… but without a Strava log to prove it, who knows! But, it is not the virtues or vices of using Strava that I wish to comment on; many people use it and some don’t. Instead it is a much more mundane aspect of the app that has been the subject to our diliberations, i.e. the naming of our tours.

The default name Strava gives each activity are more than boring; “Morning Ride,” “Afternoon Ride,” or “Evening Ride.” “Morning Ride” sounds like a Monday morning commute to work. “Afternoon ride” is what I do with my girlfriend, when she wants to go on a picnic in the park across town. “Evening ride” is an excursion with my Holland Bike to the bar down the street and to the left. The blandness of these names do absolutely no justice to a properly ridden tour. If you keep your bike perfectly matched, kit in shape, and tan lines razor sharp, is putting at least a little creativity into your digital cycling life too much to ask?

I say that a proper tour deserves a proper name, and a proper name should – like all things – be casually deliberate. A quick comment about the ride would be a basic but satisfactory name, e.g. “Hard push up to Chamonix”. If you are racing, the name of the event would be fine; “Paris-Roubaix” is far superior to the default.  A more sophisticated name would be that of the song you started to whistle while pushing through the most difficult bits of a climb. Such a title has a lasting effect. Each time those you rode with heard the song, they would be reminded of the pressure their legs felt as you climbed, and doubt would be further seeded into the moral.

I wish to avoid a long digression into the art of naming, although the horizon is large and well worth exploring. But, I do wish to assert that a cyclist who has gone digital should maintain his digital cycling life as he does his real life. Calling an afternoon conquering cobbles on your way back to Liege “Afternoon Ride” is a digital dirty chain; it is unacceptable, but luckily easy to fix.

Yours Kindly,

Arturo

Hamburg, Germany

Artie

View Comments

  • @Dean C

    What is this “Strava” thing you all keep referring to? Sounds (from what I am reading) a lot like the pet rocks from the 80s or Sea Monkeys of the 70s….they didn’t do anything but took a lot of time……

    Best of luck with it though

    But Strava is free unlike the pet rocks and Sea Monkeys. Sea Monkeys indeed were equally fascinating however. Cheers

  • I find it nothing but motivating. On efforts where I'm killing myself - deliberately trying to be my own best time - it's either gratifying to see I was successful, or (more often) disheartened it didn't work and determined to get it next time.

    Re: the OP, there was a death metal band I'm a fan of and two of their songs often play on repeat in my head, and I think the titles would be great names for a ride now and then, but by the time I get home both "I won't Come Back Alive" and "Endless Teeth" seem melodramatic.

  • @Randy C

    @Dean C

    What is this “Strava” thing you all keep referring to? Sounds (from what I am reading) a lot like the pet rocks from the 80s or Sea Monkeys of the 70s….they didn’t do anything but took a lot of time……

    Best of luck with it though

    But Strava is free unlike the pet rocks and Sea Monkeys. Sea Monkeys indeed were equally fascinating however. Cheers

    Never had a pet rock, but did send in my hard earned cash for my Sea Monkeys though....was horribly disappointed when they 1. looked NOTHING like the picture and 2. did NO tricks or wear a crown like the advertisement.

    take care guys- ride safe

  • When I ride on a narrow trail in the woods and I have to avoid reckless riders who show no consideration to hikers or traffic in opposite direction then I immediately think of Strava.

    I ride MTB since 1991 and although there have been always some selfish individuals on the trails however the numbers of inappropriate aggressive riding is more common since more people are competing against imaginary opponents.

    Can't comment on the road scene though.

  • Just like so much technology it can be used for good or ill. Basically #Rule43 applies.
    That said my Saturday bunch is a Strava collective. Bunch of strangers brought together that now have like minded colleagues to find new paths to hurting each other.

  • @Artie

    Couldnt agree more, If you're going to the trouble of recording and downloading, lets get some Titles up there !

    Sadly, at this time of year, alot of my inspiration comes from Simon and Garfunkel, namely " Hello Darkness, my old Friend, Ive come to talk with you again ! "

    Although the band " Disturbed " does a better version of the original.

  • @Barracuda

    @Artie

    Couldnt agree more, If you’re going to the trouble of recording and downloading, lets get some Titles up there !

    Sadly, at this time of year, alot of my inspiration comes from Simon and Garfunkel, namely ” Hello Darkness, my old Friend, Ive come to talk with you again ! ”

    Although the band ” Disturbed ” does a better version of the original.

    That disturbed version is brilliant isn't it?

    As far as song titles for Strava rides go, the one that always pops into my head is by Foghat's "Slow Ride" (take it easy) :-)

  • @Steve Trice

    Yep, off topic I know, but I'm throwing the glove down and saying its a better version than Mr Garfunkel's.

    Why is it that heavy metal bands always sound better doing work not related to their genre ?

  • 100% on this. I try to be inventive and cryptic at turns in my naming, with more than the odd sarcastic or self-deprecating element. Some recent rides:

    Cock, Kop & Cramps - Two notable hills (Cock Lane & Kop Hill) and the cramps I suffered towards the end.

    Easy Sunday - Anything but easy, out of breath for nearly three hours trying to keep up with whippets.

    Thetford knows I'm miserable now - Dull 30 miles on some of the flattest, most boring roads known to man.

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