Indoors at the V and Dime
If we liked breathing stale, recycled air, we’d all take up a sport like wrestling or indoor fly-fishing. But we love the feel of a gale on our faces. We cherish the smell of cow manure filling our nostrils with its almost tangible grittiness. We hold scared the privilege to breathe in diesel fuel while doing hill repeats up l’Alpe d’Huez.
But such whimsy is not for every day. Occasionally, we find ourselves faced with the prospect of an hour of solitude upon the wind trainer or rollers, where our sport is transformed from a glorious experience of powering ourselves along with only Nature for company to one where a ride of 30 minutes is barely tolerable, 45 seems like a lifetime wasted, and 60 minutes is more than most of us can even consider enduring. 60 minutes on the trainer at a leisurely pace or a 4 and a half hour death march up a barren, heat-riddled climb? I’ll take the 4 and half hours every time, thank you very much.
We all have to do it, and there are even some redeeming qualities to be had. You get better at Rule #5, for one. You develop a more magnificent stroke, for another. Whatever the redeeming qualities, we all have our way of coping. Jeff in PetroMetro returns with his view on how to make it suck just a little bit less.
Yours in Cycling,
Frank
—
Either due to life-threatening weather or poor scheduling of life’s lesser priorities (see Rule #11), we Velominati spend a little time each year riding indoors. Whether one enjoys a ride on rollers or a trainer, and no matter if one methodically spins (as all good recovery ride specialists do), grinds out intervals, or practices ways to improve one’s magnificent stroke (scrape the mud off your shoes, scrape the mud off your shoes…), death-by-boredom is always a possibility. I’m not one to go for videos, or read books, or hook up to a computer. Call me old fashioned. I like to meditate on the V with only the voices inside my head screaming for mercy from the pain of a complete lactic acid meltdown.
Or, sometimes I like a little music.
Back in the Dark Ages, I used the yellow (sweatproof) Sony Walkman to play my favorite homemade training cassette tapes. But in our modern days of inexpensive digital storage, and with the brilliant invention of the “shuffle” command on my iPod Nano, I have some seven hours of musical motivation to keep my indoor sessions lively and loud.
I thought I might start a little conversation regarding favorite training tunes. Now, I know ALL of my fellow Velominati strictly adhere to Rule #62 when riding outside. And of course, we prefer strict adherence to Rule #9, but, as I stated above, shit happens.
While I have eclectic taste, I don’t fancy Al Green, Buck Owens, or Duke Ellington when loving a Rule #5 beatdown. No. I tack to the loud and fast. My preferences are punk and “classic rock”. (It was just rock when I first heard it.) So here’s a little flavor of my indoor training selection, in no particular order.
Hate to Say I Told You So“”The Hives””from the album “Your New Favourite Band”
Tick Tick Boom“”The Hives””from the album “The Black and White Album”
American Idiot“”Green Day””from the album “American Idiot”
The Rock Show“”Blink 182″”from the album “Take Off Your Pants and Jacket”
I Fought the Law (Live)””The Clash””from the album “The Clash: Live at Shea Stadium”
Batman Theme“”The Jam””from the album “In the City”
Communication Breakdown“”Led Zeppelin””from the album “Led Zeppelin”
The Real Me“”The Who””from the album “Quadrophenia”
Rock Around the Clock“”Ten Pole Tudor””from the album “The Great Rock’n’Roll Swindle”
Of course there are many, many others. But I offer these few picks-to-click to perhaps start a little discussion and get some musical ideas for my next indoor shopping spree at the V and Dime.
A-Merckx
If you don’t live in Antarctica or north of the Arctic circle, then if you ride rollers or trainers during the winter, you are freakin’ wet snatch.
@Slash
The photo above of Merckx would tend to counter your perennially less than lucid assertion.
Based on your comments on this site, there is no doubt in my mind that you are one piss-ant of a bike rider. And possibly even a lesser human being.
@Marcus
A-Merckx brother.
@Jeff
Can you read my mind? I wanted to start a discussion about music myself :)
Some great music for cycling was already mentioned here, like Black Flag and RATM.
But there are other songs on the soundtrack of my rides:
* Anthrax “Phantom Lord” (Metallica cover)
* Clutch “Motorbreath” (Metallica cover)
* almost every other song by Clutch!
* Refused “New Noise”
* Kylesa “Spiral Shadow”
* At the Drive-In “Arcarsenal”
* The Birthday Party “Sunny’s Burning”
* Black Label Society “Fire It Up”
* Bone Thugs’n’Harmony “No Surrender” (stupid lyrics but great beat uphill)
* Cannibal Corpse “No Remorse” (Metallica cover)
* The Chameleons “Less Than Human”
* The Company Band “It’s a Confusing World”
* Corrosion of Conformity “Congratulations Song”
* Die Skeptiker “Wir warten” (great German punkrock)
* Drowning Pool “Unknown”
* Faith No More “Chinese Arithmetic”
* Godsmack “Time Bomb”
* Helmet “Milquetoast”
* Hermano “Exam Room”
* Metallica “All Nightmare Long”
* Motörhead “Whiplash” (Metallica cover)
* too many songs by Motörhead!
* Pink Turns Blue “Good Times”
* Rollins Band “Right Here Too Much”
* Slo Burn “Wheel Fall”
* The Sword “How Heavy This Axe”
* Tool “The Pot”
* Unida “Plastic”
* Veto “Built To Fail” (not our bikes of course)
* Monkey3 “Watchin’ You” (LZ cover)
and many more …
Hey moderator, where are you? What’s wrong with my comment? Too fucking long?
@Marcus
Australia, Fuck yeah!
@Marcus
You’re on fire sunshine!
@grumbledook
There you go mate…
Oh yeah, Refused ‘New Noise’ is awesome, as is ‘Rather be Dead’… and most of their stuff for that matter.
Ahh, the turbo cave. Never has a mechanical object caused me such frustration and pain. When I got mine a couple of years back, I used it incessantly. I tried TV, fans, beer, music. Shit…several of my favourite albums have been ruined for me because of a Pavlovian desire to be a little bit sick everytime I hear them.
That said, interval training is tolerable-ish and weeeindishly effective. Anything else requires epic battles of the mountain variety locked into the dvd, a surfeit of dry towels and a federal deficit size bucket of koolaid.
I’ve often wondered whether something mildy titillating could provide necessary distraction and stimulus. Season highlights of baywatch, a Russ Meyer-fest, the Dallas Cowboys cheerleader calendar projected on the wall in front….food for thought as the evening begin to close in….
Eeh Gads lads, not much productive work down in the last 8 hiurs it seems
Noone mentioned Barbara Streisand….
Eh Dr C – I did 1300m of climbing straight after work last night. In a city where the biggest climb is just over 80m….not sure if I preferred it to the rollers much, to be honest. But finishing up with a couple of effervescent, golden recovery beverages at the pub on top of the hill, sure beat collapsing in a puddle of my own sweat on the living room floor….. :)
@G’phant
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. I assume she didn’t read the fine print in her contract because no one has contacted me about that very clause. I’ll have to take it up with Jerry Jones (douchebag owner of the Cowboys) as he knows it’s true and the organization is already failing to meet its obligations (to me). I look forward to resolving this obvious oversight in the very near future.
“Debbie,” welcome to Texas.
@Joe
by my reckoning you did 16.25 repeats – that is enough to kill off even the most determined goldfish – strong work mentally
Try “Don’t Rain On My Parade”, from the Broadway Smash Musical “Funny Girl” – will have you spinning like a madman by the crescendo – horses for courses I guess – make sure you have it on fucking loud though – awesome
@Dr C
I appreciate Ms. Streisand’s contributions to the entertainment world. There. She’s been mentioned. Move along.
@brett
Indeed. Highly underrated they are. To bad Dennis has started making shit music.
C’mon people! Don’t you see the elephant in the room?
If Merckx was a rock singer, there’s only one band he’d be fronting – AC/DC.
If Bon Scott rode a bike…he’d test positive every day of the week
Wow, I must really be old school, a fossil fer sure. Led Zepplin II, the second side…and yes that’s vinyl. 20 mins or so of pure bliss, and don’t ferget to wipe up the floor afterwards. On rollers of course, trainers are for Freds.
@grumbledook
Fine choices there mate! Almost like you’ve been lingering around in my 1tb external hard drive for music.
I gotta add
RJD2: Final Frontier
Black Flag: Slip it In
Massive Attack: Angel
Cramps: Garbage man
Reverend Horton Heat: Baddest of the Bad
KMFDM: A Drug Against War
I could go on and on….
@G’phant
@Jeff in PetroMetro
Ah yes, The Cult. I went through the entirety of 10th grade without listening to anybody else. Ian Astbury’s voice is the shit. Peace Dog baby.
@Slash
Why call people a wet snatch? Call people harry ballsacks instead. Ballsacks are fragile and exposed and bring people to their knees when even slightly grazed. Snatches can take a pounding and still feel great. Make sense, ballsack?
And whomever metnioned First Ave, spot on. The last show I saw there was G-Love about a year ago. What I figured out is that G-Love is cool to have on the shuffle but gets a little tiresome live. Of the dozens of shows I’ve seen at First Ave, that stands out as the only clunker.
As far as cycling music goes. Kraftwerk and John Tesh. END.OF.
@harminator
Agreed. I can’t get through a month without hearing “Whole Lotta Rosie” and “It’s A Long Way to the Top If You Want to Rock and Roll”. Bagpipes belong in rock. They just do.
Fat Bottomed Girls by Queen always induces a burst of speed.
“Get on your bikes and ride”
Souleur owns no rollers or trainers and have always found it was a waste of good time…sorry, i just buy more wool and baselayers in winter
I do fully participate in music on the road, which i fully acknowledge as my sin in the Rules, and ask for full forgiveness Merckx
yesterday the temps registered 110* on my cpu on the road, which is stupid
Music however fluctuates
-Local H-Bound for the floor
-tommy tutones one hit-867-5309 jenny
-chevelle-mexican sun
and various others that change weekly
BTW: thanks for the others mentioned, i am going to have to pirate a few of those and check them out
@ Jeff in PetroMetro.
I raise you a ‘riff-raff’ and….
…for when you really want to end up a twitching, acid fried, floor surfing, sweat zombie after the last interval set – Ty Cobb, Soundgarden. Accept no substitute.
@Doug P
Kids, for those of you without “Record Players”, you can emulate this by listening to the second half of the MP3’s you stole off LimeWire.
Led Zeppelin remains the greatest band ever, though their best song was from their BBC Sessions: Travelling Riverside Blues. Such a groove. Amazing. I think I spent 10 years of my life listening to nothing but Zep.
But, as long as we’re talking about groove…Guns n’ Roses put out a little-known album called G’n’R Lies…the story I heard is that they were caught unawares that their record deal included two days. A full 12 hours before their second record was due, they staggered into the studio and threw together four live tracks and recorded four acoustic tracks. Patience is off this album. The rest of it sounds like this. Un-be-fuckin’-leivable.
But the best songs are not always the best to ride the trainers to. (Or get phyched up for an outdoors ride, for that matter.) For that, I might choose Pearl Jam’s Alive or Rage’s cover of The Ghost of Tom Joad.
But hands-down, the best pump-up song is White Snake, Here I Go Again, bitches.
@Joe
Ty Cobb. Soundgarden. Fuckin’ RAD. Saw them at the Gorge on Saturday. They were…AWESOME.
There is hardly a place more beautiful in the world to watch a show, by the way.
@Jeff in PetroMetro
My 6 and 8 year boys love “It’s a long way”. The whole high voltage album is one to suffer to.
@Slash
It’s people like you who howl the loudest about being tough and what Rule #5 means boast a palmares that consists of a 50% DNF rate and finish in the back of the pack in those races they do manage to finish.
Have a long look in the mirror and realize the toughest people are the ones that are humble and self-depreciating and call themselves a pussy, but then we find a pictures of them mashing up the fucking Kapelmuur in the V-Kit.
I sincerely hope your mother is OK, but you are still just as much of a twat as you were a year ago. I’d have thought a tough guy like yourself would learn more quickly than that.
Buh-bye.
@Frank – awesome. No other word for it. Love that era. Alice in Chains, Soundgarden, MLB, Screaming Trees, Janes, P-Jam, Stone Temple Pilots. I have made little sick in my mouth listening to all of them. (Actually that goes for both live AND while on the turbo in some cases….)
re the mighty zep, I once had a routine worked out solely around dazed and confused. It peaked when John B comes pounding back in with the phased drums towards the end. I used to keep that puppy cranked to the max. Sadly my downstairs neighbour didn’t really dig me launching into it 3 evenings a week and I had to change things up.
Mind you I also had a 1hr gentle spin routine based around 1999 and no-one complained about that…
@mattb
None taken, just trying to get a rise out of y’all with our stereotypes!
Lemon trees? That crap doesn’t grow this far north. I’ll use it to water my moss garden.
@scaler911
“Besides, anyone here have a video of Merckx riding a ‘trainer’? Nope.”
Exactly. I do have rollers (minouri) and even use them sometimes but not like Eddy – this is an education in poise, balance, speed …
For those who haven’t seen it:
http://youtu.be/F7K4O7YTLQQ
@Joe
Grunge. What a great era. I lived and breathed that stuff for an age. One of the coolest things about moving out here to Seattle was to go around and check out all the landmarks, like the Black Sun statue by Noguchi.
But back to cycling…I actually avoid riding indoors like the plague. The only time I do it is when I have no choice due to work, or when I need to work on my stroke…nothing smooths out a stroke like riding the rollers or turbo.
Even The Prophet had some bounce in his stroke.
@frank
Agreed. I had the pleasure of seeing Soundgarden on a side stage at the ‘Mayors Ball’ here many moons ago (and many times since). Those were the days. Fuck Justin Bieber.
howdy everyone. long time lurker.
best music for rollers?
MINISTRY-in case you didn’t feel like showing up (live)
RAMMSTEIN-herzelied (or sennsucht)
KMFDM-naive (& i dare you NOT to go balls out during “liebslied”)
NIN-pretty hate machine
[the trick during these sessions is to grind up to a high cadence, but only during the choruses, then ease back during the verses/bridge, then back up again]
if you want some ‘psycho-delic/noise/space-out’ mixes, look up podcasts from ‘spartacus roosevelt’. not bike-related, but “This podcast is recommended for aging goths, Terrence McKenna wannabes, dada-ists, Stockhausen freaks, ex-ravers with sizzling synapses, fetishists, beat revivalists, moody hip hoppers, record store geeks, pagans, subgenius, former hardcore kids, hippie burnouts, the intellectually pretentious, the partially deaf, doom metallers, piercing devotees, and lovers of machine noises.”
also check out a great work-out-mix site called ‘podrunner’, it’s got a huge collection of right at an hour-long set of mixes that takes techno from 120bpm to 180bpm.
as for falling off rollers & shooting forward, yup, i’m here to tell you it’s happened to me. fortunately i only crashed into a desk in a small efficiency apartment.
@actor1
I like the way you rock actor1. Nothing like some good industrial beatdown to get the HR up. Actually though my tastes run the gamut from classic rock to punk to speedmetal: A little (pre-Turbo Lover) Judas Priest or Tool for some tempo, a little Slayer from Hell Awaits for some high cadence/power work, a little Refused, Rise Against, or Boysetsfire to get aggro with. I like when the iPod on shuffle mode drops in the occasional Crumbsuckers or Kreator, or Wehrmacht too. \m/ Oh, I guess I would need a little Tad – Infrared Riding Hood in there to keep Frank happy.
BTW, I turn 50 tomorrow and I’m still rockin’ in the free world!
@actor1
Welcome dude (or dudette). As I believe Redranger told me a few months ago when I started posting here, let your boss know that your productivity is about to plummet. And more bandwidth would be nice.
@actor1
welcome, and great choices, will check’m out
All this talk about playlists reminds me that I really need to take the time to design one with songs that have the correct tempo/length for intervals and rest periods. I keep meaning to do it but never get around to it. Now that I have Spotify though it should be rather easy…
@Cyclops
Feliz Cumpleanos!
Pretty inspiring discussion :)
And I forgot to list:
Life of Agony “Bad Seed”
Lowrider “Dust Settin'”
The Mark of Cain “Shadows” and “Battlesick” (our friends from Down Under may know)
Melvins “Revolve”
New Model Army “Orange Tree Roads”
Pantera “Shedding Skin”
Pennywise “Every Time”
Tom Waits “Walk Away”
Truckfighters “Fortyeight”
Nine Inch Nails “Dead Souls” (Joy Division cover)
I should mention that I spent a lot of time on rollers and spinning bikes in the past. But since I got my IF Planet-X Ti more than two years ago I prefer to train in mud and snow during the dark season. Therefore, I continue violating Rule #62 and enjoy listening to music while riding outdoors.
Haven’t read every post but did not see “Flogging Molly” anywhere. They are FUCKING awesome, esp “Black Friday Rule” and “Devil’s Dance Floor.” Say them live about 6 months ago and it was soooo amazing!!!
I ride the Green Machine a bit, actually quite a bit, when I do not get a chance to ride in daylight with work and family having their due. I watch old Paris-Roubaix or Flanders dvd’s from WCP. I have about 30 now, to include a bunch of tdf’s and Giro’s and the LeMonster set.
But, all that being said, Zep absolutely rules my i-pod! :)
@Cyclops
Happy FUCKING Birthday!!!
You’ve got me by ten years. I turn 40 in January.
Have a blast and get a good ride in to boot!!!
actor1 here, i’m a dude. thanks for allowing me to sit-in on the session. i swear, these posts are just ride a group ride. you get mostly everyone working together, then 1 or 2 wise-guys up the tempo, then slot back in. unless they put the hammer down, go on a flyer, & take the posts o/t. but for the most part, it’s like a solid ride at a higher pace than you would go, if you went solo.
more music thoughts:
songs to add to the playlist:
SKINNY PUPPY-rabies-‘tin omen’ (incredibly fast break–i DARE you not to jam on the pedals…)
SLAYER-reign in blood-‘angel of death’ (ya ever notice how the guitar sounds like another song? see below…
KMFDM-naive-‘godlike’ (yup, same riff, but better in remixes; harder/faster)
albums to add:
BLACK FLAG-who’s got the 10 & 1/2? (2nd best live album ever)
PANTERA-vulgar display of power
and if i ever become an inventor, i’m going to invent a clip-on light to the chainstay that shines up through the chain. that way, while riding rollers, you can see your cadence. just like the light on the side of a turntable that remains steady when you’re up to speed (patent pending/official copyright notice/don’t frakkin’ steal this idea).
and the greatest advice i’ve taken from this site: take off the computer. pure, smooth, focus.
@Cyclops
hey, happy natal day!!!!
@actor1
*like a group ride…*
@Marcus
I sit to pee for this very reason ;)
@actor1
Yep. The V-meter is an outstanding device.
@mcsqueak
A+1
@Cyclops
We saw Neil Young in Madison Square Garden a few years back, right at the height of our recession, when our country looked very much like it would implode. He closed his set with that song. I almost lost my mind at how inspiring that song was under the circumstances. The most shocking thing? Me and the VMH were rockin’ in the aisle, and everyone else was just sitting there, going, “What?”
I love Manhattan and New Yorkers, but that place is depressingly full of “I’m too cool for this shit” dooshbags.
@actor1
They already make these for guitar players to light up their effects boards. Check ’em out. Great idea, by the way. I’m going to do that fo’sho.
@all
Thanks for the burfday wishes. Turn 50 tomorrow, State Championship road race Saturday – the course doesn’t have much climbing so I might stand a chance if I’m with the lead group at the end. Winning a SC jersey would be pretty awesome. Plus the race is the last one I need to upgrade to Cat 4. Not much chance of a 50 year old, fat, Cat 4 upgrading to 3 around here but at least I won’t be a noob 5 anymore.
hmmmm too many – a lot of great ones mentioned – anything by Tool
also, bit of a mix:
Tribute to Nothing – ‘Today is not the same’
Warren Zevron – ‘My Shits fucked up’
Stanford Prison Experiment – ‘Contusion’
Sick of it All – ‘Disco sucks fuck everything’
Samiam – ‘Full On’
Raging Speedhorn – ‘Scrapin the resin’
Lost Prophets – ‘To Hell we ride’
Kerbdog – ‘Dry Riser’
Helmet – ‘In the meantime’
Funeral for a Friend – ‘the end of nothing’
I could go on…