Categories: Guest Article

Indoors at the V and Dime

If we liked breathing stale, recycled air, we’d all take up a sport like wrestling or indoor fly-fishing. But we love the feel of a gale on our faces. We cherish the smell of cow manure filling our nostrils with its almost tangible grittiness. We hold scared the privilege to breathe in diesel fuel while doing hill repeats up l’Alpe d’Huez.

But such whimsy is not for every day. Occasionally, we find ourselves faced with the prospect of an hour of solitude upon the wind trainer or rollers, where our sport is transformed from a glorious experience of powering ourselves along with only Nature for company to one where a ride of 30 minutes is barely tolerable, 45 seems like a lifetime wasted, and 60 minutes is more than most of us can even consider enduring. 60 minutes on the trainer at a leisurely pace or a 4 and a half hour death march up a barren, heat-riddled climb? I’ll take the 4 and half hours every time, thank you very much. 

We all have to do it, and there are even some redeeming qualities to be had.  You get better at Rule #5, for one. You develop a more magnificent stroke, for another. Whatever the redeeming qualities, we all have our way of coping.  Jeff in PetroMetro returns with his view on how to make it suck just a little bit less.

Yours in Cycling,

Frank

Either due to life-threatening  weather or poor scheduling of life’s lesser priorities (see Rule #11), we Velominati spend a little time each year riding indoors.  Whether one enjoys a ride on rollers or a trainer, and no matter if one methodically spins (as all good recovery ride specialists do), grinds out intervals, or practices ways to improve one’s magnificent stroke (scrape the mud off your shoes, scrape the mud off your shoes…), death-by-boredom is always a possibility.  I’m not one to go for videos, or read books, or hook up to a computer.  Call me old fashioned. I like to meditate on the V with only the voices inside my head screaming for mercy from the pain of a complete lactic acid meltdown.

Or, sometimes I like a little music.

Back in the Dark Ages, I used the yellow (sweatproof) Sony Walkman to play my favorite homemade training cassette tapes.  But in our modern days of inexpensive digital storage, and with the brilliant invention of the “shuffle” command on my iPod Nano, I have some seven hours of musical motivation to keep my indoor sessions lively and loud.

I thought I might start a little conversation regarding favorite training tunes.  Now, I know ALL of my fellow Velominati strictly adhere to Rule #62 when riding outside.  And of course, we prefer strict adherence to Rule #9, but, as I stated above, shit happens.

While I have eclectic taste, I don’t fancy Al Green, Buck Owens, or Duke Ellington when loving a Rule #5 beatdown.  No.  I tack to the loud and fast.  My preferences are punk and “classic rock”. (It was just rock when I first heard it.)  So here’s a little flavor of my indoor training selection, in no particular order.

Hate to Say I Told You So“”The Hives””from the album “Your New Favourite Band”

Tick Tick Boom“”The Hives””from the album “The Black and White Album”

American Idiot“”Green Day””from the album “American Idiot”

The Rock Show“”Blink 182″”from the album “Take Off Your Pants and Jacket”

I Fought the Law (Live)””The Clash””from the album “The Clash:  Live at Shea Stadium”

Batman Theme“”The Jam””from the album “In the City”

Communication Breakdown“”Led Zeppelin””from the album “Led Zeppelin”

The Real Me“”The Who””from the album “Quadrophenia”

Rock Around the Clock“”Ten Pole Tudor””from the album “The Great Rock’n’Roll Swindle”

Of course there are many, many others.  But I offer these few picks-to-click to perhaps start a little discussion and get some musical ideas for my next indoor shopping spree at the V and Dime.

A-Merckx

Jeff in Big D

Just another middle-aged cycling twatwaffle. Raced road, track, and a little cyclo-cross from 1985-1990. Currently ride 250km+ per week (in my mind). The older I get, the better I was.

View Comments

  • Cracked no hands on my rollers a few weeks ago which I'm quite chuffed about, still get a bit out of shape taking out and replacing the water bottle. Also, realised that the sticker on the front roller made a noise like the chain was chattering. Wish I'd figured that one out before spending a few sessions working on the mechs (without getting rid of the noise).

  • @snoov

    Cracked no hands on my rollers a few weeks ago which I'm quite chuffed about, still get a bit out of shape taking out and replacing the water bottle. Also, realised that the sticker on the front roller made a noise like the chain was chattering. Wish I'd figured that one out before spending a few sessions working on the mechs (without getting rid of the noise).

    STRONG work! Man, yesterday on the rollers I was feeling adventurous and tried to stand up (do not remember which sick bastard suggested that on this site) and ended up shooting straight ahead on the bike right off the rollers and into the table with the computer showing the dvd on it. Fortunately no one was hurt (i.e bike or myself) but I did adjust the rollers spacing so that now my front axle is directly over the front roller (it had been a bit behind it).

    Still, I am a total convert! I'll take rollers ANY DAY over the KK Pro or Cyclops stationary trainer.

  • @Buck Rogers

    STRONG work! Man, yesterday on the rollers I was feeling adventurous and tried to stand up (do not remember which sick bastard suggested that on this site) and ended up shooting straight ahead on the bike right off the rollers and into the table with the computer showing the dvd on it.

    This isn't the droid you are looking for.

  • @Buck Rogers
    I'll take pretty much anything over the stationary trainer. But I think that has something to do with my last session on it. My program required a five hour ride on rolling hills. But the weather conditions in my only available window of opportunity that day were simply too dangerous to share narrow roads with unsypmathetic drivers, so I simulated a five hour rolling hill ride with five hours on my wind trainer. I can confirm that five hours on a WT feels is a very long time. I do not intend to repeat it.

  • @G'phant
    FIVE HOURS?!?!?! Good God, man, you are one sick and tortured cyclist! My max was a little over three hours two years ago and that nearly killed me.

  • @xyxax

    @Buck RogersHey BR, now looking at the Kreitlers myself after thinking I could get off cheap. How do you like the 2.25"³ drums?

    F'king LOVE them. I get a great workout and they rock all around. I should buy stock in the company. They are truly AWESOME for indoor training!

  • @Buck Rogers

    I did adjust the rollers spacing so that now my front axle is directly over the front roller (it had been a bit behind it).
    Still, I am a total convert! I'll take rollers ANY DAY over the KK Pro or Cyclops stationary trainer.

    How did that adjustment affect things? Kreitler says to have the front roller a bit ahead of the axle.

  • @itburns

    @Buck Rogers

    STRONG work! Man, yesterday on the rollers I was feeling adventurous and tried to stand up (do not remember which sick bastard suggested that on this site) and ended up shooting straight ahead on the bike right off the rollers and into the table with the computer showing the dvd on it.

    This isn't the droid you are looking for.

    This is not the droid we are looking for. Move on.

  • @Nate

    @Buck Rogers

    I did adjust the rollers spacing so that now my front axle is directly over the front roller (it had been a bit behind it).
    Still, I am a total convert! I'll take rollers ANY DAY over the KK Pro or Cyclops stationary trainer.

    How did that adjustment affect things? Kreitler says to have the front roller a bit ahead of the axle.

    They do? Crap, I'll probably kill myself worse the next time I ride them. I was able to get just er 50 k in today outside so avoided the rollers. I'll let you know how it differs the next time I ride them. Should be this week as I am on call and my hours of work are a lot worse.

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Jeff in Big D

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