Categories: In Memoriam

In Memoriam: Unsafe Headgear

I appreciate my helmet. I treat it with respect. I never leave for a ride without it. I replace it after a crash or even after helplessly watching it bound down the stairwell like some kind of deformed styrofoam slinky-dink after allowing it to slip from my grasp. (This activity also typically involves some assertions questioning what it does in its spare time, its origins of birth, and things of that nature.) Community member @chaz also recently suggested that, in accordance with motorcycle tradition, we ceremoniously cut the strap on the helmet and hang it in the VVorkshop in deference to the purpose it served us.

Suffice to say, I’m grateful for the advances technology offers us when it comes to protective headgear, because staying alive is in alignment with my strategy. But progress is the slayer of ritual and tradition, and I can’t help but look back longingly to the days when helmets were rarely worn and if they were, they consisted of thin strips of leather that, assuming it stayed on, would do little more than keep your cranium from coming apart after cracking it to bits on a cobblestone or some such object.

The hairnet was the coolest cranial accouterment ever designed, with the insulated cycling cap that fit over it being a close second. The cycling cap on its own was, of course, also a class piece of kit to be worn forwards, sideways, or backwards – made cooler only by perching a set of cycling-specific shades on top of it. A helmetless head saw hair slicked back by the wind as a byproduct of the V as riders raised their arms in triumph over the finish line. The bare noggin on the high mountain passes was a beacon of Purified Awesome, allowing us to see in all their glory the suffering faces of the riders as they moved sur la plaque over the summit.

Take a moment, fellow Velominati, to honor the Useless Headgear of our past.

[dmalbum path=”/velominati.com/content/Photo Galleries/frank@velominati.com/Headgear/”]

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @DerHoggz
    Just the road bars that came on the AR in the picture mate. Sphinx are quite dear and not for my style of riding, but they are quite good.

  • this argument that its a choice about the helmet- plain bullshit. All these various risk taking activities without the customary precautions- under the pretense that "no one can prove its safer" is mostly selfish, really. @otoman summed it up- others pick up the pieces. Personally I can speak to the discomfort of trying to put these people back together ( it's like the other type of dad paradigm- first being te awesome quote "if you're not wearing it you don't need it"; second one is "we didn't need any of this crap and everyone was ok(the guy they threw away the mold afterwards...) as they're trying to die. @scaler911 can tell you all about it.

    I'm not advocating for new rules or customs etc; just don't say that it's an equivalently responsible choice based on the lack of absolute proof. On the same line of reasoning- the fancy little device that measures oxygen in the blood from beat to beat- no study has proven conclusively a survival benefit after millions of patients. But no one- stupid, cavalier, curmudgeon or profoundly stubborn old school would dare do surgery without.

    At some point society will either remove the option of the activity or refuse to fix(pay, really) for the result of failure to take reasonable precaution. Then it will be a real choice.

  • @ChrisO
    It was largely about hairnets till you lobbed your post in. Pull your head in, it sounds like you've had this coversation before and THIS IS NOT THE PLACE to make your point.

  • @DerHoggz
    Yeah it is. The bars on the track bike (Tk2) are the road bars that originally came on the AR that is also in the picture. Sorry, should have been more clear in my previous statement.

  • @ChrisO

    Oh dear I thought it had stopped... getting rid of Mormons was never this hard.

    We may disagree but that's pretty damn funny. I've moved on, my rant was enough for me.

  • An acceptable post about helmets:

    I was wearing a helmet today while on a four lane street with a median. Two gauchos were riding down the median on their horses. We proceeded to have an impromptu sprint.

    I dropped them.

  • @Minion

    @ChrisO
    It was largely about hairnets till you lobbed your post in. Pull your head in, it sounds like you've had this coversation before and THIS IS NOT THE PLACE to make your point.

    You know what you can do with your head Minion... except it will never fit up there with a helmet on.

1 8 9 10 11 12 18
Share
Published by
frank

Recent Posts

Anatomy of a Photo: Sock & Shoe Game

I know as well as any of you that I've been checked out lately, kind…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s World Championship Road Race 2017

Peter Sagan has undergone quite the transformation over the years; starting as a brash and…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Women’s World Championship Road Race 2017

The Women's road race has to be my favorite one-day road race after Paris-Roubaix and…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Vuelta a España 2017

Holy fuckballs. I've never been this late ever on a VSP. I mean, I've missed…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Clasica Ciclista San Sebastian 2017

This week we are currently in is the most boring week of the year. After…

7 years ago

Route Finding

I have memories of my life before Cycling, but as the years wear slowly on…

7 years ago