Cobbles, Bergs, Beer, and Legends. Putting the V Back in Vlaanderen.
It has been a busy couple of weeks in the Velominati Boardroom as we’ve been scrambling to finalize a few partnerships and get all the products for the Keepers Tour customers designed and produced. Suffice to say, fists and beers were slammed in tandem as we feverishly worked out the final designs.
Producing V-Pints, V-Shirts, and V-Musettes seems a simple enough task; and we also needed a flag and banner to fly at the roadside of the various races we are due to watch from the roadside, including de Ronde van Vlaanderen and Paris-Roubaix. There was also a the small matter of getting our hands on musette bags, which aren’t commonly found on the market, as far as we could tell. Fair heart, never worry; Gianni and his VMH took matters into their own hands and made them up from scratch. If their other business ventures fail, musette-sewing may be a good fallback, they Look Fantastic.
The most significant effort due was for the Keepers Tour Cobbled Classics 2012 design; enter our graphic-design mastermind, KRX-10. We tossed a few emails across the net and settled quickly on the notion of using a variation of the Lion of Flanders. “Now we need a public-domain vector graphic. Race you to it”, was the last word from KRX10 on the matter before the design was finalized. Then it was on to deciding on a tag line, with the result being perhaps the best example of what happens when the Keepers argue long enough on such matters.
With that, we proudly present the official artwork for Keepers Tour: Cobbled Classics 2012:
The last two weeks I’ve felt like a kid waiting for Christmas as orders were placed and we entered into the torturous period of time while we waited to lay our hands on the final products and see the fruits of our labor. And I have to say, this round may have produced our finest products yet; the V-Lion and tagline turned out magnificently, as did all the other items. The flag and banner are actually breathtaking – waving in the wind. We hope you like it as much as we do.
A few items of note: Attendees of Keepers Tour will receive a musette packed with their V-Shirt and V-Pint along with a few lovies from our sponsors, and will also have the honor of commenting for the next year with the V-Lion badge. Also of note is the matter that these products are not available for sale and will never be; the only way to get Keepers Tour products is to attend a Keepers Tour, so bear that in mind next time around. Finally, if you’re looking for a real photo of the V-Pint, you’ll have to wait until we arrive in Belgium, as they were shipped ahead while I was away on business and as such they have not yet been seen by anyone, even me.
Please also get yourself acquainted with our Twitter and Tumblr sites if you’ve not done so already – we’ll be reserving the site for major updates, and will be posting minor updates in those to locations throughout our trip, with Twitter being used for small updates, and Tumblr for the ones that are too much for a tweet and too little for the V.
VLVV.
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@G’rilla
between frank riding the recumbent and us already thinking you were doping for the pdx cogal, nothing would surprise.
Have fun, totally jealous! still wondering how you got the child care dispensation. Of course that’s being said as I prepare for one more day of riding in madison and then on to asheville for some serious climbing hell. Hope Anjin-san shows more charity than the cobbles!
@G’rilla
My goal is that someone questions my dental work.
@ChrisO
email sent.
If works ever takes me in the direction of Abu Dhabi, which is not unlikely, I’ll take you up on the offer.
@frank
@Dr C
No thanks! I’ll stick to the cobbles.
@Whiteyrgear
Agreed. I’ll be sporting Tineli kit on the Keepers Tour.
@frank
Mine is that I don’t like descending
@itburns
That’s pretty cool!
@Oli
Agreed, definitely black shorts only with that one
@ChrisO
I take it you will adjust your fluid requirements for the Belgian temperatures, otherwise we are going to have to stop every 20 minutes for you to take a leak
@Chris
Thanks, and sorted…
@Dr C
Don’t worry about that – I am like a camel now. My only fluid requirements will be post-ride recovery ones.
Regarding kit – whether for the tour or generally – my greatest wish remains a Velominati cap, in any or multiple styles.
In lieu of which I will be sporting a selection of caps. Unfortunately the Brooklyn cap clashes with the Velominati kit so I may have to go plain white Giordana, or purple Rapha.
I’m even considering wearing a helmet, given the possibility of coming off on the cobbles and actually having the type of impact they are designed for. But that may be an altogether too radical step.
They’re not compulsory in France are they ?
@ChrisO
Compulsory in France, I doubt it. We might bend over to the EU’s every whim but the French are much more selective in their compliance with the rules.
You’re more likely to be told off for not smoking Gauloises as you ride.
@ChrisO
No helmet…..like I say, Buck Rogers is the man for the skull fracture advice
For myself, I am trying to fit this in my bike bag – I may have to rent a bike when I get there, as there is no room for it in the bag now
@Dr C
Just don’t expect any assistance getting back up!
Is that hole on the middle of it’s forehead for the recovery fluid IV?
@Chris
Well they did have a little burst of insisting that cyclists had to wear bright reflective clothing etc.
I’ve usually worn a helmet when riding in France (and Belgium) but that’s because it’s been part of a cyclosportif event where the organisers demand it.
I’ll see how the packing goes, and I may try to bring it and wear if it is wet.
Dr C and Buck, just remember I’m of more use to my family completely dead than brain damaged so if I’m not moving someone should ‘accidentally’ run me over with the support car to make sure.
@itburns
I like it. Not crazy about the font. Our regular font with V-cog I think would be the way to go but that is cool. really cool.
Arrive in Amsterdam. No bike. Its Europe. Whatever, though I do sincerely hope it shows in time for our departure to Lille.
My goal for the KT is that someone tells me my sideburns give me a nice RDV look.
In order to help me feel slightly less p.o.’ed about not being on the Keepers Tour right now, would anyone like to share their reasons for not being able (allowed?) to go?
Mine was mainly Budgetatus related. Fingers crossed that this becomes a yearly thing, since I should be much more financially sound in a year. Then again, I’ll probably be in better shape because I’ll have a job, which I don’t have now. The complexities of being a Follower.
@frank
One would think that, by 2012, airlines could get a box to arrive with its owner. The logistics must be much much harder than I imagine. Somehow, I doubt it.
@marko
I trust you packed your polyester leisure suit.
BTW, the Prophet has been indicted in a corruptionn case. Details ici.
…corruption… Someday I will learn to type/spell.
@Ron
The trifecta of budgetatus, the lack of unlimited vacation time, and the fact that there’s no way my VMH would let me leave her with the kids while I was on The Continent riding the cobbles.
In Hong Kong, been awake for 20 hours, flying for 13, a 3 hour stopover now then 12 more to Amsterdam.
My goal for the Keepers Tour is to stay awake.
@Ron
Im a full time student(like 40 hours a week full time) and then work part time. a proper vacation, of any kind, wont be in my cards for another few years. although when I got my aid check at the beginning of the semester, I got some crazy ideas about blowing off rent and food and gas for a week on the cobbles.
Arrived in Amsterdam with bike and huge suitcase. I have already lugged bike much more than I ever wanted, I rather ride the damn thing. I have a better chance injuring myself hauling this thing up and down flights of stairs than riding the stones. Hotel is a proper dump(no lift or storage) but enough room in shower to shave guns. I got a look at Iceland for an hour, excellent espresso at least. Brain not working well yet.
Frank must be beside himself if bike is not by his side. At least he can hassle people in Dutch. Poor Brett and Rigid, that’s a long haul.
Now what’s all this talk about a red light district?
@Flying Crowbar
All that for me, plus the fact that I’m perpetually two months from peaking.
@frank
Yikes. Chapeau for the calm demeanor. I would be Freaking. The. Fuck. Out.
@Gianni
Congrats on a successful transfer. Pro cyclists of Merckx’s era never had proper hotels. So you’re right on track for an authentic, epic ride on the pave. As far as the Red Light District, that’s where you hire your soigneur feminine for the week.
@brett
Hang in there, Bretto. Sleep is for the weak.
Btw, Sagan just took the first stage of the Three Days of De Panne. He looks fit and fast for RVV and P-B!
I’ve been drinking Belgian Douchesse de Bourgogne in honor of your trip all week.
@frank, @The Oracle
Chapeau indeed. I may have said something irreversible at that point that, in the eyes of the airline, would have made me ineligible for my flight home.
Aye, I had two Hoegaardens Witte beers last night in your honor… they couldn’t do the Flemish style frittes though…
@Gianni
+1.
@frank
Ooof. Thinking good thoughts! regarding your bike, hope it shows up shortly!
@frank
Some TSA dickwad probably took it home. (Though I really hope not, that is a beautiful rig).
@brett
You can sleep when you’re dead. Mother Fucking Keepers Tour!! Make us proud boys!!
The Keepers have arrived in Amsterdam?
@scaler911
Given Frank’s Dutch heritage, I think he’d prefer to use a caravan. True story, while visiting a friend in Germany (he’s a native German), he told me that 8/10 times, if you see a camper being towed by a car, they were probably going to have Dutch plates. I’m not sure if it coincided with their holiday or not, but he was right.
@Ron
Newly purchased house, 2 yr old, etc. Mainly, however, the lack of V in even proposing it to the wife. I’m doing good getting a Cogal weekend in with the fam in tow. I can help reason it saying ‘wait 10-12 years’ and do it when the boy and I can suffer together.’ More likely he’ll kick my fucking ass.
@Ron
I had to replace a water main the day of a local cogal. Can only imagine the house would fall down if I left the country!
@Tartan1749
Are you saying that the Dutch are actually gypsies? Interesting…
/Yeah, I like daags.
@Ron
Daughter got married last Oct. All fundage went to cover that, plus I couldn’t ride most of last year due to knee and foot issues(thankfully now resolved)
@scaler911
Bodacious
@Jeff in PetroMetro
man oh man, my mind has just been blown. I went out for some walkies and a few things hit you. Take the most cycle crazy town you know of and multiply by at least twenty. Bikes everywhere, parked, special lanes, on the road. Beautiful women motoring by, moms with four kids in a front kid delivery bin, no helmets anywhere. They appear to have right of way over both cars and pedestrians. They don’t stop.
Women in their underwear, standing and sitting in a parlor, smiling and waving, available for sex at 4pm, damn thoughtful of them.
And lastly, the air is redolent with very strong cannabis smoke. There must be some serious stoner vs cyclists accidents because neither is paying enough attention. And there are seemingly hundreds of coffee shops where when you wander in you cannot help but get a second hand stone, this shit is serious.
Some photos, the first is Frank’s legs in his SF to AMS flight. He is in for a long one. The rest may be obvious. The sex toy sticks on the shower wall, ’nuff said. I’d chuck them up on Tumblr but I’m way too stooopid.
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@Gianni
Love it, Gianni! I think I got a contact buzz from your post alone.
@marko
No worries. Just a random font selection that filled up the space. Overall idea was to base the look on the Brooklyn jerseys, but I’m assuming that is obvious to most here.
@itburns
What about “taking inspiration” (as i believe they call it in fashion and artistic circles) from the Dutch National Cycling Champion jersey. The 2010-11 one was simple and cool.
Swap the blue for black, and the red for Velominati orange and have Velominati written in an old school block lettering in the white section… Just a thought.
@mcsqueak
Trying to stir the pot, I see. haha
@Gianni: If you happen to see one of those beautiful women spinning by in their underwear carrying the sex toys, think you could snag a photo of that?
@Gianni
There are soooo many YouTube videos I could link up for a response, but not a one of them is safe for work. Not one. Damn.