We all have our obsessions, and principle among mine is the pursuit of silence when it comes to my machines. Not every sound is a bad sound, mind you; the hum from the tires, the growl of a carbon wheel under acceleration, the crisp click of a shift – these are sounds that set my heart alight. But sounds such as a lazy creak or metallic click – particularly one emitting in time with the pedal stroke – these sounds creep into a dark corner of my psyche to stir an anxiety usually reserved for lonely thoughts in the dead of night.
The sounds characterized as those that require silencing have a variety of causes, some minor and some critical. The minor causes generally spring from an ungreased, loosened, or dirty part; a bolt hiding somewhere on the frame perhaps, a quick-release skewer, maybe a spoke. A more serious cause might be a tear somewhere in the frame or rim, or perhaps a worn bearing. What these sounds have in common is that they can be incredibly difficult to pinpoint; the most elusive sounds are rarely reproducible in the workshop and thus can only be identified while riding. The worst are those that only emit from the machine during an intense effort, with oxygen debt providing an unwelcome distraction to trying to debug a sound.
The causes of these noises are difficult to isolate because bicycles are made of long tubes and most modern bikes also often have large-diameter tubes of irregular circumference. The problem with long, irregularly shaped tubes is that sound loves to travel down them like it does a megaphone, allowing it to amp up and amplify along the way, emitting from a point far from it’s origin.
Because of this, one is forced to take a methodical approach to isolating the cause, starting with the most likely and working up to the most remote, testing only one remedy at a time until the offending source is found. This means the process is often too detailed and lengthy for the mechanic at your favorite local bike shop to pinpoint. Not for lack of skill, mind you, but for the simple fact that it would be too costly in terms of labor, and the shop mechanic likely has better things to do than listen to you prattle on about a tiny creak that emits from somewhere between your front and back wheel only while going up the steepest grade in town. It also has the associated problem that, assuming you’re insistent enough, they will wind up moving, changing their phone numbers, and travelling through water so you can’t track them. Believe me.
You’re left to your own devices in this matter, which means you’ll need to learn to maintain your bicycle. Which is just as well, since as a Velominatus, it is your duty to love and respect your machine and there is no better way to do this than to maintain it yourself. As with everything thing, the best way to learn is to find a Cycling Sensei who is willing to guide you. They will likely start by putting your bike on the stand, strip everything down to the bare frame, and build it back up. And then do it again, this time with you leading, not them. And again. And maybe one more time. In fact, lets make it an even V times.
At this point, you should have a basic understanding of the art of bicycle maintenance, and the rest will come from experience. By “experience” in this case, I mean mostly the bad ones, punctuated by glorious success. You’ll make mistakes. You’ll strip the delicate threads from your gorgeous aluminum derailleur. (That’s just an example, I did not strip the threads out of my dad’s brand new Campy* Euclid front mech when I was 13.) But experience, assuming you learn from all those mistakes, will feed your knowledge and serve as an excellent way of understanding empirically the right way to do things. And when you get it right, and the sound disappears, it will be all the more rewarding.
In the end, you’ll also build a lexicon of sounds and their causes, allowing you to apply a remedy quickly to a sound that previously may have taken several weeks to identify. One of the most challenging (and infuriating) creaks I’ve wrestled with was one that only ever produced itself when I was climbing out of the saddle. I immediately identified the sound as likely being that of my front skewer creaking. I cleaned it, applied some lube, and tightened it up, fully expecting the sound to disappear. But it didn’t. On and on I wrestled, becoming increasingly frustrated with the sound until finally I discovered that the bolts in my downtube cables stops had loosened slightly. In the end, a quarter-turn from an allen wrench was all it took to vanquish the sound, and with it several weeks of frustration.
On the rare occasion that your knowledge and experience fail to isolate the sound, take your machine your most trusted shop mechanic. At this stage, you should have a working understanding of the various conditions that cause the sound to reveal itself, and armed with this knowledge, your much more experienced and skilled mechanic should be able to identify the sound for you in no time. Watch how they work, and learn from them. After switching to Campa a few years back, my drivetrain started making a sound I’d never heard before, only when I was riding in particular gears. I spent ages trying to find the cause to no avail, finally bringing it in to Speedy Reedy. Within minutes, Gerick found that the lockring on my cassette had loosened; a quick twist of a wrench, and I was on my way, pedaling happily in silence. (And always leave a tip for them in the shop tip jar. If the shop doesn’t have one, bring a jar and put a tip in it and leave it there. Or bring a growler of your favorite beer, empty it together with the mechanic, and use the empty vessel as a tip jar.)
One of the most enjoyable and rewarding aspects of La Vie Velominatus is wrenching on your machine; learn to do this skillfully, and you’ll open the door to a world of silently-running and impeccably shifting machines. A greater joy can scarce be found.
*Since I’m talking about a MTB group, I thought it best to refer to Campagnolo by the more Americanized “Campy” rather than the Euro “Campa”.
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A loose bidon cage bolt drove me batshit nuts for about two weeks once. The loose cleat mounts in the bottom of certain shoes can be the work of the devil if a) cleats aren't snug or b) you don't use something to keep them from moving around.
I get a little cable rattle from time to time on the internally routed cables of my BMC but very rarely. The cross-over helps that out.
Currently, a spoke on my front Open Pro creaks when I'm out of the saddle.
And for as much as I like my SRAM gruppo, the "double click" is too loud. I prefer the more muffled clicks of my Shimano gruppos.
What's interesting though is normal drive train sounds like freewheels and chains running over cogs are like bad breath. You never notice you're own but everyone else has it bad. I'm not sure why other than we're upwind so to speak of our own drivetrains and so the noises aren't as noticeable.
A riding buddy refers to my Campy freewheel as the loudest freewheel he's ever heard. I think he is just jealous.
I have this annoying noise that comes from my crank/bb after a while. its more of a creaking noise. This is where knowing how to wrench your own bike is important cause I don't know how to take that apart and I don't have the tools I need. So I live with it till I can get it fixed.
BTW I am in the market for some used(but working) 9 speed Shimano shifters if any one want to unload a pair.
That reminds me that I need to take advantage of my local Cycling Sensei who offered me some carbon grease for my creaky seatpost. At least I hope that's what's making that noise.
Out on a group ride this evening in the V-Kit, two different people yelled "Velominati!" with a hopeful gasp as I rode by (too far gone to stop and chat...maybe next time). I felt like a celebrity.
Nice timing - I literally dropped off the steed this morning to my LBS due to a misplaced creaking when out of the saddle. I've tried all the usual remedies but to no avail. The creak is driving me nuts (A guy walks into his doctor's surgery with a steering wheel down his pants...) to the point where I'm imagining the sound through the music of my iPod. Hopefully it's nothing too sinister but I am a bit scared since I ride a Cannondale and, yeah... well...
I swear this sport is just like that girl in high school - you know the one. You give her everything and she's like "m'eh" to the point where you end up lying awake at night (or in my case sitting at my computer at work) softly sobbing to yourself "why wont you love me back! Why? WHY!!!". Then you manage to suck face with her at Dave Hanson's party and you think "YES! This is really happening" only for her to go back to "M'eh" the next morning. Vicious.
Nasty creak coming from my front end when I pin it out of the saddle. I'm thinking it's either where the rear brake cable hits the front stop on my internally routed top tube, or the headset. Honestly the headset would be an easier (although more expensive) fix: just replace the bastard. If it really is due to the brake cable, cable stop interface I'm damned if I know what to do.
My ride is making some noised but I'm currently obsessed with getting a new pair of White Ladies dialed in. The left cleat placement is driving me nuts. I just installed a new chain and a lot of noise went away with the old chain but there is an odd click when I am pedaling on climbs. I think cleat and/or pedal need a bit of lube but who knows from whence the noise emanates.
@frank
That rear mech in the photo is obviously well cared for. Love the hub especially.
@sgt
This should be near the top of the list of things to check when you have a creak.
@Vitus 992
I'll have to file this bit of info away in the memory banks as I have a similar if not the same set up. Drives me nuts when it needs to be tightened. So far no noises though. As far as I know.
This is all too true. Having recently set out upon the Path of the Velominati, I have found that I can feel the presence of Merckx in my soul when all is quiet on the machine, and the only the rumblings of proper mechanisms can be heard. The zip of the chain upon the cogs, the sizzle of the tyres upon the ground. And yes, the reassuring chain-slap when riding the pave. Some time ago, my deep meditations were interrupted by a sacrilegious syncopated pinging from the machine, and only with some research did it become clear that it was due to my keeping by wheels too clean. A drop of lube on the cross of the spokes, upon the nipples and hub attach points made me one with the Prophet again. And my insistence on the Rule of Silence has extended to my Velomohottie's Cervelo as well - it uses internal cable routing, and the cable housings rest upon the sides of the frame. Thus, when catching a bit of rough road, they slap against the frame. A disturbing sound that takes me away from feeling the true presence of Merckx in my soul. Some simple finishing tape solves the problem easily. Mmmm...honey, that's so exciting, I want to just stop and do you right now.
But I am never ceased to be amazed at how many blasphemers there are in the annual Seattle to Portland double Century. A fun and flat 200 mile ride with 10,000 of your closest friends brings out some real kooks. Yes, the occasional Pinarello Prince goes past me (yes, goes past me) under the thrust of a Cognoscenti with the legs to match, and even I can say a few hail Merckxes and not be too ashamed. But Eddy H Merckx, some of these fucktards are riding shit that doesn't even qualify for Frank's parts bin. Have some respect for the art, will you please? 200 miles on a creak creak creak is just heartbreaking. Some have some real classic stuff on their hands, but can't even take the time to wipe the grime from its whirling bits. There outta be a law. I'd really love to beat the shit out of them with their own fucking frame pump - likely it only functions as a club anyway. I take solace only in that they will be doomed to burn in the fires of Mt. Velomis when they meet the end they so richly deserve.
sounds like we are victims of the dreaded noises
Regarding my bottom bracket, the noise was actually a very subtle click, just about audible, but deafening at the same time
Key to its diagnosis
- timed with pedal stroke
- only when giving it some V on a hill (when you need your rhythm most!)
- only present when stroking, not on descending
Maybe that'll help someone, as I never thought it could be a bearing issue, as it sounded like the front deraill cable end tapping against the pedal - drove me crackers!
Sounds like a dry b/b cup to me. It needs removing, cleaning, regreasing and reinstallation.