La Vie Velominatus, Part IV: The Great Escape

The Col du Tourmalet

One of the most magnificent things about Cycling is that not only does it represent different things to different people, it represents different things on different days. Some days, it’s training – a means to an end. Other days, it’s the culmination of a body of work; rather than a means to an end, it represents that end itself, whether that end is exhilarating or devastating. But these two facets represent Cycling only as Sport, the complex simplicity of the balance between dedication and results.

Cycling stands apart, however, in its many dimensions beyond Sport. For me, Cycling is meditation, a time to clear my mind of ancillary concerns and contemplate on those that require my focus. It is thoughtlessness, a time to eliminate everything through the simplicity of pain. It is simultaneously medication and therapy; even a short ride can shake a heavy lethargy from my bones and rejuvenate aching muscles and joints. It is simultaneously tension and release; Cycling can fill my being with effort, an effort that overflows my legs and lungs and spills over to fill every fiber of my being, flushing from me all those things I wish not to keep.

Cycling is penance for my mistakes; a few hours at the mercy of the Man with the Hammer can help me understand the error of my ways. It is cleansing of other’s mistakes – here the Man with the Hammer helps pound out the ripples in the surface of Life they cause me.

I am by no means a great man and never will be. But I am a better man for my bike, and for that I am eternally grateful to it.

Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

Chris says:

Sep 23 2011 at 1:20 am

Clicked on a link to this video of someone jumping of a mountain in China in a wing suit and fuck me! Look at the road he flies past, switchback spaghetti!
Roadslave525 says:

Sep 23 2011 at 1:27 am

@DrC... re: your idea for a P-R 2013 Sportive EuroV trip.... awesome idea. Only suggestion I have is that ASO only run the 'official' P-R sportive every two years (that includes the velodrome and velodrome showers experience)... looks like it is June 10th 2012 and then will be similar time in 2014. In 2013, it will go ahead unofficially (on the Sat before the real P-R), but this year - even though I think Rapha organised it - there were some challenges with the status of roads, police coverage etc.

HOWEVER The Tour of Flanders is run every year, and I would highly recommend it - on an awesomeness scale of 1 to 10, the RvV scored a 27 for a great day's riding and experience.
Dr C says:

Sep 23 2011 at 3:02 am

@Chris
are you going to post the link?

@roadslave
good point, I'd forgotten it was alternate years - happy to do ToF next year instead - need to sort something unofficial, as Phil Anderson charges about £3000 for his week long trip! Will keep an eye on 2012 P-R Sportif and see how it pans out - I recall all the dramas they were having with the route earlier this year
Chris says:

Sep 23 2011 at 3:09 am

@Dr C
What a twat I am! Go here.

I'm up for cold weather, muddy adventures on the pave in 2013 and for that matter sportives and the like in the UK/Ireland - it would be great to get a V Fuelled Paceline going if we could get the numbers!
Dr C says:

Sep 26 2011 at 2:27 pm

@Chris
Man alive, that is a serious bit of twisty Tarmac!
huffalotpuffalot says:

Sep 26 2011 at 2:32 pm

@Dr C

haha I just noticed I wrote about the same thing independently on another thread. As I said there 11.2km with 1100 meters of ascent and 90 hairpins in total. Let the hill repeats begin!!
G'phant says:

Sep 26 2011 at 2:49 pm

There's an even more extraordinary Jeb Corliss clip here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWfph3iNC-k&feature=youtube_gdata_player

If it doesn't work, Google "Jeb Corliss" and "Grinding the Crack". (Despite its title, it is SFW).

Nads of krypton.
Chris says:

Sep 26 2011 at 3:33 pm

@G'phant

If the fat boy with the balloons had got that wrong it would have been messy!

He can also fly through mountains!
Chris says:

Sep 26 2011 at 3:34 pm

@huffalotpuffalot

@Dr C
Let the hill repeats begin!!

I might just go for one the first time round!
Dr C says:

Sep 26 2011 at 4:19 pm

@G'phant

There's an even more extraordinary Jeb Corliss clip here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWfph3iNC-k&feature=youtube_gdata_player
If it doesn't work, Google "Jeb Corliss" and "Grinding the Crack". (Despite its title, it is SFW).
Nads of krypton.

Just bonkers - why would you even bother to wear a crash helmet? (I guess to attach the cameras to?)