It’s been about a month since I’ve last been on the bike; I can’t recall the last time I went for such a dry spell. The reasons don’t matter; life and work have been hectic, I moved, the bikes were just out of order and inaccessible enough to make it easy to find an excuse not to kit up and head out onto the roads. And, to be perfectly honest, I didn’t really want to ride.

It happens every so often, this strange desire not to ride. It’s different from the usual one where you don’t really want to go out on any particular day; this is has more to do with burnout than laziness. I’ve learned to wait it out; the desire always comes back, organically and strongly. And come back it did, although it did take a bit longer than I expected.

With coming back to the bike after a while off always looms a long shadow of dread. My legs are soft; I feel it in every step I take. Running up the stairs, my body doesn’t feel as springy and I know that springiness will translate to lethargy on the bike. Out on the bike, I labor with the gradient; the ease with which I once scaled the local climbs hangs in my memory like a dream whose details vanish the more you try to call them into focussed thought.

To prepare myself mentally for the first ride back, I did what every sensible person does: I poured myself a beer, tidied up the bike room, and set about meticulously cleaning my bikes in order to preemptively remove any opportunity for those being an excuse. The bike itself needs to be in perfect working order lest my mind should fixate on the slightest malfunction or noise and descend into a Millarcopter-inducing fit of rage.

Patience will be my mantra for the coming months, patience. I will not push myself too much, I will let the joy of the ride envelop me. Within a few weeks, a shadow of something resembling strength will take shape in my muscles, and it will spur me on to ride more. Eventually, the power will return and the memories of this drought will take their place in the catacombs of my mind.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @ChrisO

    @BacklashJack

    So, I’m not alone in being crazy busy in December and neglecting my form? Woo hoo!

    Funnily enough I’ve just been thinking I need to build in a bit of neglect.

    My PMC has been going along nicely but I need a bit of a dip now and then or it isn’t sustainable.

    I like to think that I neglect one form for another. Right now, "round" more approximates my condition.

  • @KlamSoss

    I so feel for your pain, having been there myself. And lord how your post resonates. Even to the place I did not like. All I can say is I'm out the other side, and no doubt at all the rides heloped me through it. I'm going out today, and like a Buddhist prayer wheel, every turn of the crank wI'll be for you.

  • @Joe Bloggs

    It's all relative. I'm getting used to constant 70° to 80° days. Low sixties feels chilly. And due to the drought here there is a very low chance of a Flemish tan happening. I will say I miss the hard days in the saddle fighting exhaustion, frost bite, and losing the bike on an icy turn.

  • Thanks @frank for posting this, and thanks to all of the commenters—this is exactly what I needed to read tonight. I've been off the bike for a while as well. Roughly three years to be exact. Excuses come easy—work, children, family, other made up things...

    I've made plenty of excuses to not be on the bike only to discover that those excuses are actually reasons to be on the bike. Riding makes me eat better, sleep better, laugh more, and it makes me a better worker. More importantly, it makes me a better father. I need to ride not only to expose my children to the sport, but to be a happy father for them. They deserve to live in a happy house and I can't imagine a house being happy without bikes and the people who ride them.

    I've  been back on my bike consistently since the end of October. I'm not good for much more than 40 miles right now, but it's coming back. Patience.

  • @frank  that makes two of us.  3 weeks off here for no other reason than work, big illness, and sheer fuckn laziness.

    Like you, I will now show patience on the comeback trail.  Dont reckon the infamous Garmin will even get turned on.

    "No Garmin, No Rules" Well some rules maybe, we aren't savages after all.

     

  • Long time lurker here!

    After a year of excuses many on here will recognise (work, kids and a DIY "project") I've barely ridden a quarter of last years mileage and nothing at all for the last 3 months.

    Today I was presented with an opportunity to cycle to the in-laws that had to be taken. What followed was 30 long horrible miles in to a headwind. It was brutal.

    But now, now I feel great. I know that was the hardest it will be and I'm back on the bike at last.

    Most importantly though for the first time in ages I've earned my malted recovery beverage!

  • i just concluded my own month long layoff this morning.  holidays, a chest cold, and my family's health insurance policies being discontinued, with the resultant scramble of research and daily phone calls, all kinda ganged up on me, and i basically spent a month in bed doing business on my laptop and ignoring the world at large.  40k today felt like 80k, and i struggled to average 30k/hr.  but damn my bike felt good as it ate the asphalt.

  • I recently had surgery to repair a leaky brain blood vessel. (It is not as scary as it sounds). I was off the bike for over a month (doctor's orders which also included no climbing at all). I must admit that the forced histus was somewhat enjoyable. Today was my third ride post surgery, the legs feel rubbery and my arse aches. Patience...patience...patience. Thanks for the reminder.

  • @EJ Acosta

    I recently had surgery to repair a leaky brain blood vessel. (It is not as scary as it sounds). I was off the bike for over a month (doctor’s orders which also included no climbing at all). I must admit that the forced histus was somewhat enjoyable. Today was my third ride post surgery, the legs feel rubbery and my arse aches. Patience…patience…patience. Thanks for the reminder.

    Keep well, best wishes.

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