Being away from the bike is agony. Even for the day, while I’m at work, my mind swims about, thinking about my next ride. I worry that I won’t be home early enough to get the ride in that I’d planned – or worse yet – ride at all. I agonize over my decision not to ride in the morning, or to work, hoping one missed day doesn’t turn into two doesn’t turn into a week.

I wonder at which bike I’ll choose; I can visualize them hanging there, in the workshop, quietly waiting to be set free from their prison – a bike is only free when it’s being ridden. I imagine they discuss among themselves which is entitled to be ridden next; they might even place wagers on which will be the lucky one. I’m not sure with what bicycles might place wagers, perhaps a bit of grease for a creaking quick-release that I haven’t noticed yet.

All day, I evaluate how my body feels. Sitting folded up at a desk is a horrible place to judge one’s weight; I’ll lean against the desk’s edge and wonder if there was less of me touching it yesterday. I’ll feel the muscles in my thighs as I cross my legs in a conference room, and judge whether they feel stronger than the day before. Sometimes I’ll feel for the fibers in my muscles with my fingertips and then realize that the other people in the room with me probably find it odd that I’m rubbing my legs absentmindedly. To be fair, I find it odd that they don’t know what it feels like to be in shape.

It is a mystery whether I’ll be strong on the bike today or not. At the office, there is no way to know how I will feel; I won’t really know until I put in a real effort, which usually happens on the first climb of the day. Strength is a strange thing; the other day I felt blocked during my warmup but hit the top corner of the first climb so fast I almost lost my front wheel. Almost losing your front wheel in a corner on a climb is a special feeling.

Tim Krabbé wrote, “Non-riders. The emptiness of those lives shocks me.” Indeed; we are Cyclists, the rest of the world merely rides a bike.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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  • @KogaLover

    @wilburrox

    @chris

    …. and I recognize it won’t be long before I don’t.

    The reason I took up cycling again a couple of years ago was because my daughter was skiing faster than me (and I do Super-G’s and Downhill), so I figured I had to improve the legs’ muscles. It worked but she’s still ahead of me if she wants. Fwiw: I feel more comfortable going downhill fast on skis than on my bike. Am practicing cornering but any good suggestions or videos are much appreciated.

    Heck with downhill part... won't help the leg muscles! Just joking of course, going down is half the reason for going up in the first place. But I'd be last person to explain how to go down a hill fast. Cheers

  • @wiscot

    @RobSandy

    Also, the lead photo…Nicolas Roche?

    Not sure. Could be. It’s not the Tour as Rein Taaramae of Astana was #8. I’m trying to figure out from the sponsors on the back wall which race it is.

    I was going on a. Sky and b. the Irish bands on the sleeve of the jersey. Can't think of any other Irish Sky riders.

  • @ChrisO

    Yes, World Masters Champs. Looking forward to it immensely!.

    I probably should have said "short" rather than "easy" turbo sessions - they were not recovery rides, but still not what I would usually do. There is also the fact that taking 3 days away (fly out Saturday, race Sunday, return Monday) is a lot of time, and whatever rule #11 says, we all know that the family/bike balance will have to be re-addressed in the near future!

  • @wilburrox

    Heck with downhill part… won’t help the leg muscles! Just joking of course, going down is half the reason for going up in the first place.

    When I first picked up cycling again, I tried to stay away from going uphill, which is rather a challenge when living in Switzerland. Meanwhile I am actually enjoying the uphill pain-in-the-legs&lungs better than the downhill pain-in-the-neck. Hence fully agree with Rule #93... Contrary to Rule #55 however, I enjoy going downhill because it means I will need to go uphill again.

  • @RobSandy

     Last week, I got wolf whistled as I walked in. Sadly, it was by a man.

    I feel your pain brah! I come in through the back door to the office now. If it's not smirks, it's shaking heads.

  • @RobSandy

    @wiscot

    @RobSandy

    Also, the lead photo…Nicolas Roche?

    Not sure. Could be. It’s not the Tour as Rein Taaramae of Astana was #8. I’m trying to figure out from the sponsors on the back wall which race it is.

    I was going on a. Sky and b. the Irish bands on the sleeve of the jersey. Can’t think of any other Irish Sky riders.

    I'm going to say that photo is from this year's Vuelta and as such it's definitely Roche.

    I've out-wiscotted wiscot. And I got there before Oli. Do I get a badge?

  • @wiscot

    That's probably my favourite photo of him riding.

    He's certainly addicted, he did a club run with the social group (the third group on the road who prefer not to be called the C group) recently. 82k in the rain at about 25 kph. He loved it. We're gong again this weekend but has been told that he can't come out every weekend as I want to ride with the faster groups as well.

    He wants to do a 120 km sportive at the end of November.

    @wilburrox

    And the beauty of it is it takes n+1 to 2(n+1) so, as much fun obsessing about our own personal n+1 bike is, when you get to do it for the kiddo’s too? Even more fun.

    Without posting Don Logan, no.

    He's got a road bike and a mountain bike. That is plenty and he's been told he can learn his craft riding regular drop bars. Until he's honed his bike handling, he's riding regular drip bars. Old school testing, no aerobars.

    Following on behind was good but I can only take him to the TTs if I can get away from work early which generally means I've only got time to pick him up and get down to the start. If I've got time to pick my bike up and change then I'm racing too.

  • I tend to get stressed out, and riding reduces that stress.

    When I don't ride, my stress isn't reduced. Further, not riding is, itself, a source of stress.

    The lesson? It's as simple as ABC.

  • @RobSandy

    @RobSandy

    @wiscot

    @RobSandy

    Also, the lead photo…Nicolas Roche?

    Not sure. Could be. It’s not the Tour as Rein Taaramae of Astana was #8. I’m trying to figure out from the sponsors on the back wall which race it is.

    I was going on a. Sky and b. the Irish bands on the sleeve of the jersey. Can’t think of any other Irish Sky riders.

    I’m going to say that photo is from this year’s Vuelta and as such it’s definitely Roche.

    I’ve out-wiscotted wiscot. And I got there before Oli. Do I get a badge?

    Stage Six from the Rouleur gallery.

    Another give away would be the beer sponsor.

  • @chris

    @RobSandy

    @RobSandy

    @wiscot

    @RobSandy

    Also, the lead photo…Nicolas Roche?

    Not sure. Could be. It’s not the Tour as Rein Taaramae of Astana was #8. I’m trying to figure out from the sponsors on the back wall which race it is.

    I was going on a. Sky and b. the Irish bands on the sleeve of the jersey. Can’t think of any other Irish Sky riders.

    I’m going to say that photo is from this year’s Vuelta and as such it’s definitely Roche.

    I’ve out-wiscotted wiscot. And I got there before Oli. Do I get a badge?

    Stage Six from the Rouleur gallery.

    Another give away would be the beer sponsor.

    My head is hung low in shame that I didn't see the Irish stripes on the sleeve. I my defense, the magnificent guns are just so compelling to look at!

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