Categories: La Vie Velominatus

The First Ride Back

Cookie, crumbled. Photo: Sirotti/Cycling Fans

It’s the ride you’ll do the most. The hardest ride you’ll ever do, too. You’ll do it so often that it should be easy, but it never is. Its frequency is such that it really should morph into all the other rides of its ilk, therefore negating the actual nexus of this necessary, evil ride. But it never does, it’s always stuck out there on its own, no matter what the duration between it and the next one is, could be months, could be only a week, but it’ll never leave, like that mate who stays for a couple of nights yet really should be paying rent after the first month, or at least offering a 20 for some food. This is the modus operandi of the First Ride Back.

As you get older, the FRB becomes more regular, unlike yourself. Jesus, my latest FRB really shouldn’t have qualified for its status at all, but such is the fickle nature of fitness at an ‘advanced’ age that just six days off the bike is enough to send one into panic, that the hard earned fitness is somehow leaving the body at a rate many times faster than it was acquired. Even with a pretty solid few months of riding under the belt, the effects of six days off, caused by an errant finger meeting a spinning disc rotor, sounded a death knell to me. A couple of opportunities came and went, adding to the mental mire as well as the (mainly perceived) physical one. Jumping back into the Tuesday night jaunt brought the daunt. Begging for hostilities to secede always falls on deaf ears, and plea bargaining for no hills is as well received as a stripper at Sunday school.

I recall reading an article by recently retired Baden Cooke some years ago where he spoke of his own FRB, an annual rather than weekly or monthly occurrence for him. Unlike mere mortals, he would no doubt have a pretty good base to draw upon, and even after a month or two off the bike (and probably partying hard as Cookie was known to do), he would still have the kind of condition most of us could only dream of. Yet he suffered the same mental and physical barriers as a normal rider does, but with a distinctly different approach, namely a 300km ‘hell ride’ from which he’d return some seven hours later with a sense that his season was now ready to start. A 50km jaunt with a couple of efforts thrown in seems almost laughable by comparison, but mirth never seems to enter the equation until the bike is racked and the celebratory beer is poured.

By the conclusion of the FRB, everything always seems much better, no matter how badly you’ve suffered, how far out the ass you were, what portion of your lungs you’ve coughed up. Just when you think you could take no more, the surVival instincts kick in and wring one, two, three last droplets of the Essence of V from within, and gives pride a swift kick up the ass for good measure. The next day you are renewed, and can’t wait to do it again.

Just not any longer than a week away, ok?

Brett

Don't blame me

View Comments

  • @scaler911

    I always take Oct-Nov off the bike as a way to "reset". I usually start the FRB slowly, mixing it up with skiing.

    This year, however, I had the misfortune of tearing the labrum in my hip. So after a steroid injection (ya ya, I'm on PED's now......not really) I got back to it last week. Slowly, per the Orthopods instructions. The first 7-10 days always suck. It's really all in your head. Most of it is disappointment at the struggle to get up those steep bumps in the 42/19 that you were killing in the 53/17 in August. One thing that experience teaches us though, is that like LeMan say's "it never gets easier, you just go faster". Faster just can't seem to come fast enough.

    Glad to hear you are on the way. The methodical return can be a useful journey, but it's also understood that "the time=space continuum can start to mess with you" as you're racing to where you need to be. Nice when day 1 becomes day 10 and then day 100.

  • @brett Kudos! The sentiment is a perfect one. Riding today started me thinking "this is faster than before and we (2 riders) look feel pretty good -- keep going with this..." We both had had our day 1 about two weeks ago and we are getting back swiftly. You touched on an essence of cycling here: "The next day you are renewed, and can't wait to do it again." And will be ready to do it again. Even the thought that 2014 USA Cycling will be renewed next week added to the ride today -- "keep doing this..."

  • @xyxax

    @scaler911

    Yes, no hijacking, but I'll bite: positive wallet biopsy?

    @Buck Rogers

    just pimping you for old time's sake. Felt good.

    Sending you my shrink's bill for sending me into a PTSD episode from rounding while an intern!

  • @xyxax

    @scaler911

    Yes, no hijacking, but ....

    Hijacking a thread???  Isn't that what we are SUPPOSED to do around here?  This is fuck'in Johnny "Short Attention Span" Bravo theatre, right?

  • @withoutanyhills

    I can't wait for the FRB after my recent broken hip which was itself done on a FRB - a cold and frosty morning, damn you rules #5&9!!!

    Good luck with the Double FRB and also glad you will be on the way.

  • Wow, the timing of this article is spot on. It's been 4 months off the bike for me. Last Sunday did my FRB and it fucking hurt, mentally and physically. Crazy how much form one looses in one week, not to mention 4 months. Lesson learned - do whatever it takes to stay in shape when off the bike.

  • I had a nasty FRB last week. And it was worth nothing as we are in the midst of 4 days in a row of 40 degree days (thats over 108F to you Septics) so i aint riding (too hungover in the cool of morning due to the use of beer to combat dehydration - which combats it like the Dutch combatted the Germans) so i will have another FRB tomorrow.

    Things could be worse - could be in Adelaide (where all the cyclists are) where it will be 46 today!

  • @Buck Rogers

    My senior residents and I gathered around him and waited as he looked up at us through groggy eyes and with a wrasping voice said, "My ASS hurts!" quickly followed by "You know that night nurse? She's a REAL BITCH" and then he laid back and went to sleep.

    Oh. My. Fucking. God. Too good. 

    There are volumes of philosophy to be written about this. 

  • @brett

    Another fab article, timely for both the time of year and (for some of us) the stage of life.

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Brett

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