To look good is already to go fast.
-Paul Fournel, Vélo
My approach to research is pretty straight forward. First, I develop an opinion – usually in a cognitively compromised state. This is the first step in the process for the simple reason that it avoids the bulk of the hard work involving things like reading and thinking. Next, I cherry-pick evidence from my experience and what few materials I have read on the subject in order to support my opinion. Finally, I defend myself with whatever dirty tricks or facts I need to invent in order to maintain my position.
It is only on rare occasions that I will be unable to guess at the evidence I need to support my claim, but in those cases I already know I’m right, so not finding evidence that contradicts my position is almost the same as finding some that supports it. I consider those circumstances validation of my opinion and thus fortify the resolve that I’m right.
Over the lifetime of The Rules, numerous bright sparks have popped up out of the ether like some sort of internet Whack-A-Mole to point out that many of them are all about aesthetics. The point is true enough, but the Velominati have always understoodd that Looking Fantastic is the fundamental building block to finding the motivation to get out on the bike day in, day out – Rule #9 or shine. The fact that the hard work of training is what actually makes you faster is glossed over when you get excited about kitting up in your Flandrian Best, echoing the summoning of Flemish hardmen who have come before you, and using their image to inspire you to get out and lay down the V. Its basic, really.
Despite how certain I’ve always been that this is Truth and that The Rules have been handed down by Merckx from high on Mount Velomis to inspire the masses, an Austrian professor, Dr. Erik Postma of the University of Zurich, recently conducted a study to see whether Looking Fantastic really does indicate athletic prowess.
The results confirmed that Science is unnecessary when you’ve already guessed the truth, but nevertheless it is handy to have a scientific study support my assumptions in case I can’t make up facts as quickly as I need to during an argument. It also strikes me as interesting that the study found that women on the pill are about as good at identifying attractive males as men are.
Thanks to Shaka Mitchell for sending this validating study along to us.
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@VeloSix
I think any time your wife refers to you as a sexy man beast, that's pretty great. Especially since her friends seem to validate it. That's even pretty greater.
I would advise you to keep your long hair despite whatever crappy reason you can come up with as to cut it. Your long hair might even lead to "sexy man beast" sex, which is way better than the usual kind, which is "if you absolutely must but make it quick because my show is on in five minutes" sex to which the customary response is, "Five minutes? More than I need."
@VeloSix
I have long hair, long enough that it needs to be tied on the bike else give up 10 watts to the mess blowing about my ears. My fringe is runs to below my chin should I let it and it being in my eyes is a distant memory. My wife loves it, and hence why I have the hair style that I do but I have just realised neither she, nor her friends have told me I look like a sexy man beast....
The Rules have just codified what I already practiced in other sports throughout my pre-cycling life. Looking good, feeling good, playing well. All deeply connected.
Awesome lead photo!
Jumped out of bed this morning and got an hour of riding in before the snow and rain blew in. Nothing as nice as kicking off a new week with an hour in the saddle.
@wiscot Turkey season starts in April.
@Puffy
Get yourself some clippers, both of you! How can you expect your helmet to fit properly? How can your head possibly cool down with that mop all over it? What about the poor brain cells frying inside? It's called the perfect amount of dumb, not completely stupid. You are no longer twelve or Chris Horner!!!
That Colombia kit is pretty sharp.
One more instance of Frank apparently tossing off a witty little article.
Witty my ass.
For anyone willing to reflect on it and remember anything they ever read in any humanities course, this article intervenes (in its way) in centuries-old discourses on linguistic/cultural oppositions between what we call reality and illusion, surface and depth, appearance and reality, signifier and signified, and whatever the greasy fuck else you want to call the Levi-Straussian shit I'm suggesting for your edification.
Frank, this article takes no prisoners. It just pretends it does. Chapeau.
To Look Good is Already to Go Fast .
Mmmmm, let me be a thorn in the side of that argument @frank.
For Saturdays Cogal I tried my absolute best to look good in order to go fast. No EPMS, all Rapha'd up. etc etc etc.
Then 45 degree celsius hit and a fcker of a Northerly wind hit us and my fast went out the back door. #5 and #9 were continually repeated in head by my little brain. But alas, fast I was not.
@Barracuda
Statistical analysis would validate the underlying thesis. Individual cases are just that. Perhaps we could entertain this claim: "All or most things being equal, to look good is already to go faster."
But what a pedantic fucking construction.
@PeakInTwoYears
Gotcha