Flies and dogs, two things that we don’t need on a climb.
I had descended down this street many times, but I had never before ridden up it. I even said hello to the two excited pitbulls on the other side of the driveway gate. I like dogs. I like them until one of them squeezes under the gate and I’m going uphill slowly. Pitbulls aren’t the fastest breed out there but they can haul ass when they have incentive. He was under the fence and closing the distance to me in seconds. Yelling and sprinting uphill; this could be a new speciality in the sport of cycling. I can shout curses, commands and climb at the same time, a skill the professionals never show off. He was right next to my rear wheel yet I escaped. The damage to my heart and nerves may last forever.
There was an older pitbull on our Sunday ride route. It always added a frisson as we approached the slight uphill bend. Sometime he was waiting for us, sometimes not. Luckily by the time I joined the rides he was a little more bark than bite and a watery blast from a bidon backed him off. Then he was down to three legs. Last time I saw him he was relaxing on the side of the road, he picked up his head and watched us ride by, and put his head down again. Score one for the cyclists.
It’s always a climb when some dog needs to chase me.
In New Mexico, on a rural highway, two dogs saw me from a house above the road. The dogs flew down into a deep gulch between the road and the house. I shifted up and started Hornering (must add to lexicon) my ass up the long hill, hoping they couldn’t get through the gulch. Please baby jesus don’t let them get through that gulch. They must have had a well worn path through that gulch as they were quickly coming up my side with only a guardrail between them and me. Again, I had just enough time to get body and bike flying before they got under the guardrail. Fuckers.
The bidon squirting is a good method; it surprises dogs completely. But it’s hard to do when gripping the bars tightly and crushing the pedals whilst cursing at beast. Pulling a bidon out and spraying a dog in the face requires one let a dog get his face in spraying distance and I’m not that guy if I can help it.
Having your legs spinning in a blurred motion might be a deterrent for the close-in dog. It’s harder to bite a blur.
Stopping? Who dares to stop and put the bike between shaved leg and dog? No, I’m not that guy either. If there is nothing to chase, they won’t bother you. Really, what single breed of dog is that? Most nasty dogs can’t believe their luck that you stopped; it nearly takes the fun out of it for them. What, I can just bite you now? So you stop and do not get bitten, dog just sits there and dares you to ride off. It is a standoff, hoping the owner eventually comes out to see why his dog is barking? The owner is at work, he should be home by 5:30pm.
I’m a bad sprinter and a bad climber but when chased I can do both at the same time. Maybe I just need a canine coach. It would produce my best hour record on the track; a slavering German Shepard who can run 40 km/hr for an hour. In some damaged atavistic part of my brain I actually appreciate this seemingly life or death sprint. I don’t enjoy it but I appreciate it. In cave days we had a rock or spear to make sure we made it through the day. Now we have a big chainring and ergo-shifters to assure our survival.
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Dogs were one of the reasons for carrying a frame mounted pump, back in the days! When I was a kid just getting into racing, a spot of jousting with the local canines was always one of the highlights of any training run.
Fast Phil takes some irresponsible dog owners to task.
@Chris
His flannels are indeed gleaming but he has neglected to put on socks - a Rule contravention unless of course he took the time to dress before mounting his steed as the lion was bearing down towards him in which case the sock omission may be forgiven as an oversight just this once.
@Andy Pandy
Hmm - now if you modernise that we carry CO2 cylinders. Why did the closing scene from Jaws come to mind? I love dogs. Mostly. There are no such thing as bad dogs just bad dog owners.
@norm I hear you. If I ever have a need to protect an innocent with some sort of beast, it will be a number of geese. Those mofos are the most territorial and protective things known to man - behindfalkland islanders of course
@mcsqueak
Was it this dog? She's always been nice to you:
@Marcus
Ding, ding, ding...first Falkland Islander joke registered on the site. Congratulations. Your free pair of socks are in the mail.
I agree about geese, they suck. A samurai sword is all they understand. I carry a sword over my back like Toshiro Mifune in The Seven Samurai when riding near geese.
@Marcus
Is your middle name Manlius by any chance ?
@uptitus
I'm glad that works for you. I never thought carrying explosives would be a great idea, and I'd be afraid I'd squeeze too hard trying to monkey it out of my jersey and have a little mini explosion in my hand. If I don't have the motor skills to grab a bottle of water I reach for 20 times a day without looking, then I definitely don't have the skills not to blow my fingers off with a panic firecracker reach.
@Ron
Maybe it has more to do with the trailer than the dogs?