Hello, could you connect me to Dr. Ferrari please? Or just give me a Ferrari in my bottom bracket.
Marco Pantani had Armstrong on the ropes. It was the Col de Joux Plane in the 2000 Tour de France and the only time Pharmy was in real, genuine difficulty during any of his “seven” Tours. So he did what any reasonable rider would do: he got on the radio with his team boss and demanded he call his coach and renowned doping genius Michele Ferrari to find out precisely how long Pantani could sustain his effort. Ferrari crunched some numbers on his custom Effort Finder-Outer Machine and got back with the good news that Pantani couldn’t hold the pace to the finish.
The problem Batman had with The Joker was that Batman was rational and The Joker was insane. And insane people don’t always do what rational people expect them to do. Like having a plan, for instance. Or wanting to make it to the finish at all. Lance wasn’t Batman – not by a stretch – and Pantani wasn’t insane. But the point is, they weren’t thinking about the race the same way. Armstrong wanted to win the Tour de France but was a stubborn ass who was too proud to let the world’s best climber drop him. Pantani, on the other hand, had already lost everything and been to Hell and back; he had nothing to lose and was more than willing to sacrifice his own Tour if it meant he could fuck with Pharmstrong, even for a bit.
So he rode until the lights went out and climbed into the team car. Ciao. Armstrong was left holding the bag. Or, rather, not holding a mussette with any food in it. Bon jour, Monsieur avec le Hammer. Comment allez vous?
Cyclists have always used whatever dubious means they can find in order to gain an advantage, this is not news. It is only natural in a sport as demanding as this, which is not to say it is by any means excusable. But cheating has been woven into the fabric of our sport since the earliest days; in the first Tours de France several riders were disqualified for getting tows from teammates via cable and jumping on trains to rest the legs and gain a few extra kilometers over their rivals in the process.
When Greg LeMond helped pioneer the use of radios between riders and the team car, I hardly think he imagined his nemesis using the technology to contact the most notorious doping mastermind in the sport in order to gain a mid-race performance update from Italy. I don’t know why that feels so much worse than regular doping. It almost feels like putting a motor in your bottom bracket or something.
Motors? Now we’re getting far-fetched.
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@brett
All accidental of course.
Just got the dates mixed up.
@Barracuda
Of course. And we know the British don't dope, just like the Aussies, and the Kiwis...
*She's just pulled out the "most tested athlete in the world" line!
What the athletes have to deal with as I understand it: always letting them know where you are at any time, showing up at your house or hotel at any time, giving up blood and urine on demand at any time and frequently… one day in the future we'll look back at this and say how pathetic that must have been. Sure, it's being the managed I suppose the best way people know how to manage right now. And athletes that want to compete on a level playing field have to participate in this sh**ty part of the biz. I have no idea what technology will come along or how sentiment will change towards medical and pharmeceutical technology in sports. But it really, really would suck to have to put up with that as an athlete.
@brett
This is why the COTHO can never be forgiven. We can no longer trust or believe anything someone accused says, because the line we were fed for a decade by that piece of shit.
-Eddie
@EBruner
The Armistead Affair is very saddening. I really had respect for her and as has been mentioned by several of her competitors, you miss one, you damn well don't miss two. If you miss two, you really don't miss three. Armistead isn't some rookie. Even if they were all innocent misses, she not only knows the consequences, she knows the perceptions.
@Barracuda
According to this the first missed test was down to the tester walking away when the hotel staff wouldn't let him in. You can't blame Lizzie for that.
@chris
Yeah but as has been said, she knew that was down as a missed test - which she didn't challenge at the time - and yet she went ahead and managed to miss two more.
I don't think she has missed them because she was glowing and wanted to avoid a test - I agree it is probably cock up more than conspiracy. And before people say that's national bias I would argue that there are some countries where I'm prepared to give the benefit of the doubt e.g. UK, France, Germany, Australia and others where I'm not e.g. Russia, Kenya, Jamaica, Spain. That's based on accumulated evidence and the rigour of national anti-doping strategies.
And that's where Lizzie's incident is very disappointing. I'm prepared to believe she wasn't doing anything wrong but in missing further tests she has shown a complete disregard for anti-doping efforts and as a world champion and national representative she should be setting a better example.
@chris
So Armitstead says. If I was being facetious I'd say "how does she know if she was asleep". Either way it doesn't explain why she didn't challenge it straight away. More alarming is the timing of the missed tests, not to mention the distinct lack of sympathy for her "errors" from her fellow athletes.
@litvi
I didn't know about the Barry Bonds asterisk tbh, but I have just discovered that the Maris one never existed at all, so Bonds it is!
@ChrisO @Steve Trice She's undoubtedly fucked up after the incident and her other two missed tests are inexcusable (or just one of them if it is true that she'd been caught up in a family emergency) but having read of the lengths other testers go to to get their man (or girl), the fault of the first missed is down to the tester.
Sounds like the parcel delivery twat who stuck a "While You Were Out" note through my door whilst I was just about to open the door. No knock or anything.
It would be interesting to know how many missed tests happen. Loads? I assume we only hear about them when there are three of them in a year. If that's the case and Lizzie shouldn't have go the first then is a complete non issue until she gets another one less than a year after the second.