La Fleur de V grows on Keepers Tour 2012. Photo: Jesse Willems

We have the kind of poor judgement that allows us to have a puppy. She’s half pit, half something, and half something else and boasts a lilliputian-sized head. As her Life Coach, I’ve instructed her to focus on growing her head because, as her Uncle Gianni says, no one gets anywhere in this world with a tiny head. But she’s a good puppy, and she’s making good progress. Despite her physical shortcomings, she’s got heart – the kind of spirit that makes everyone around her like her immediately.

The Rules are simultaneously unifying and segregating. They bring the like-minded together while casting those on the fringe outward. This is unfortunate, but necessary; The Rules are a gateway to enjoying ours, this most difficult of sports, to the fullest. Their purpose is to breed Velominati, not scare Cyclists away. At the same time, anyone who dares venture into this realm must be prepared for what awaits them. While The Rules have evolved from an abstract notion into something approaching a Religion and lack any formal order, but there is no mistake in the importance of the first V Rules whose message are to take them with tongue firmly in cheek, lead by example to guide others towards the path, and – oh, by the way – the path starts out hard, and only gets harder as you go along.

We all have our induction into Rule #5; mine came when I was just seven years old. We were out skiing at Lake Phalen in St. Paul when a white-out blizzard hit. For those of you not from Minnesota, getting stuck in one of those is like getting stuck in a Slurpee machine, but without the fruity flavors. Rather than turn back, we followed the tiny bit of groomed trail we could see in front of us and completed our loop. We even beat the search party home, which was kind of like winning. The sense of satisfaction when I walked into the chalet that night, having pushed through a scary situation and come out the other end unscathed, was owed to our willingness push on and not give up. I’ll never forget that day, or my introduction to The V.

Cycling is a sport, a simple thing. It is something we do for pleasure. But Cycling is also a simplification of reality, where we can test our perseverance and learn to fight the greatest adversary we can encounter: ourselves. A Cyclist learns to push through pain to achieve a goal. These lessons are then applied to our lives to allow us to become better people. Because of this, the Velominati learn to be strong, tough people.

For those of us who have studied The V, we have learned something about ourselves that can never be taken from us. I’ll go to the grave with the lessons that I’ve learned on two wheels that have been subsequently applied to every walk of my life. Life’s hardships, in whatever form they meet us, can be more easily dispatched when one has learned to push harder when the legs burn and the lungs scream out in agony.

La Fleur de V grows inside us. Its pollen spreads to those with whom we interact, much like my puppy’s good nature infects everyone she comes in contact with. Guide the uninitiated, and always observe Rules #5 and #43 in all aspects of life, not just Cycling. The pretenders quickly fade into the background, and the Velominati stand apart as strong, good people.

Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @Ron

    An extra 40 km? Yikes. Don't tell anyone or they'll force a gps device on you.

    On KT, we had two GPS's with the same map loaded and they both pointed us in different directions. It appears that unless you've already ridden the route and have enough datapoints loaded, the device guesses about the next term in much the same way a person would. Not as handy as we're given to believe they are.

  • @Ron

    And what is priceless about the VLVV is that it provides balance. None of us are wacky nuts like ultra marathoners or something. We love turning the cranks, but we also love the journey, the balance of life + bicycle, the beauty of a Silent Machine, and the camaraderie of a global network of Followers. The only thing "extreme" about any of us is the level of our passion, not a asceticism that borders on unhealthy and anti-social.

    Beautifully put! Pedale.Forchetta's name is based on one of the older (if not the oldest - I'm sure he can clarify) cycling clubs in Italy. It means pedal and fork, implying the balance between life and the bike. I love that balance and for that reason I'm glad I'm not a Pro.

    I'd like to be a Pro for how hard they can kill it, though.

  • @frank

    Pedale.Forchetta's name is based on one of the older (if not the oldest - I'm sure he can clarify) cycling clubs in Italy. It means pedal and fork, implying the balance between life and the bike.

    Thank you for this.

  • @Deakus

    Visited brother over the weekend his Fox Terrier has just had pups!

    That puppy looks like it wants to kick my ass.

  • @Ron

    @Gianni

    @gregorio

    Cheers, indeed! Last week I had it in mind to do a 120 KM ride, but got lost and finished at 160 KM. Perhaps the rules give us a mindset for accepting expected and unexpected challenges? What the road gives unexpectedly sounds [to me] a fair bit closer to the spirit of our sport. This year's Giro stands as an example. Embracing the challenge and pain opens up worlds of possibility. The outcome for me last Friday was improvised nutrition at gas station convenience stores and a personal best time. Memorable and sweet: it's all about The V.

    Well done! Getting back to home/car/station is such good motivation when a long way from such. There is only one way to get there and it will require some Rule #5, effort and time. What a great way to enjoy some life.

    An extra 40 km? Yikes. Don't tell anyone or they'll force a gps device on you.

    It has been said but it really, really is beautiful to head out on a Saturday morning, maybe some arm and leg warmers on, a few things in the pockets, two full bidons, and know that you are going to be out for hours with the only thing to rely on being yourself. And Rule #5.

    The reactions people have when you tell them you ride for five hours or 160 kms are priceless.

    And what is priceless about the VLVV is that it provides balance. None of us are wacky nuts like ultra marathoners or something. We love turning the cranks, but we also love the journey, the balance of life + bicycle, the beauty of a Silent Machine, and the camaraderie of a global network of Followers. The only thing "extreme" about any of us is the level of our passion, not a asceticism that borders on unhealthy and anti-social.

    A-Merckx to all this. Set out Saturday around 10:30am. Felt like going long but waiting to see how things felt. Bit cool to start  and wind remained light from the south east. Roads were good an quiet. The kms ticked by and I kept adding a wee extra bit here and there to known routes. Finally hit home at 216 kms. Longest ride ever and could have done a few more but was running out of time. I know it's not about just logging distance, but in this case I was about feeling good and challenging myself. I hit 160kms at 5hrs 45 mins. It was both a physical and mental challenge and once done, will become easier as the bar gets set higher. Next challenge? 240 kms. I know I can do it now. People think I'm nuts, but when I look at their unfit, let-themselves-go, fat asses, I remain serene in my choice of leisure time activity.

  • @seemunkee

    @Deakus

    Visited brother over the weekend his Fox Terrier has just had pups!

    That puppy looks like it wants to kick my ass.

    That puppy does look like it wants to kick your ass....that puppy looks like Roy "pretty boy" Shaw.

    And he could kick ass.

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