La Vie Velominatus: One Piece at a Time

Its a 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99 bicycle.

Patience has never come naturally to me – I’m more Calvin than I am Hobbes in that regard. Yet I am meticulous and demanding of myself and those with whom I journey through life. It is a conflict that has caused its fair share of grief; my childhood is piled high with memories of incidents where I made choices and mistakes that robbed me of the satisfaction of a job well done.

One such episode involved my eagerness to have bar-mounted shifters in the early nineties. STI had just come on the market, and they were priced so high it would require disciplined saving in order for me to afford them. Rather than patiently saving, I spent my money on lower-cost options which differed in their implementation but shared in their failure to quench my thirst for STI. At one point, my father pointed out that with what I’d spent on cheaper compromises, I could have already bought what I really wanted.

Some lessons in life are easily learned, but to practice them is another thing altogether. While I have learned patience, it is often stretched to its limit as I have also become more exacting in my expectations. What the Prophet giveth, he taketh away.

I have finally reached the point in my life where I enjoy the journey as much as I do the destination. I can’t imagine buying a complete bicycle and forgoing the process of hand-picking the kit to dress it up in and embarking on the quest to source it. For me, a bicycle begins as an idea which slowly materializes through the curation of its frame and components. The process of assembling it is a ritualistic undertaking, a kind of spiritual offering to the Elders on Mount Velomis. The assembled bicycle marks the end of a journey during which we’ve already bonded.

Only as this journey comes to a close are we ready to begin a new one, one where we evolve through prolonged exposure to The V. The path to becoming a Velominatus is built on taking the time to do things correctly, and building our machines is no exception.

Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • Nicely put.

    I'm in the middle of a build, frame-set in hand, wheels and saddle on the way, cockpit chosen. Bro-set being debated.

    The hours of research, web site perusal, chats with other riders and mechanics will be missed when it's put together and on the road, but I suppose that's where the n+1 comes in.

  • One piece at a time

    - Baum Ristretto Ti

    - ENVE fork

    - 3T seat tube and stem

    - 3T bars

    - DA 9000 running gear

    - Lightweight Obermeyer wheels

    That outta do it !     Now, where did I leave my cash ?

  • On the Bugetatus side of One Piece at a Time, I present my track steed:

    The day I bought it: a previously-owned entry level steel frame. Nothing special, but I am new to riding on the track and this is what I could afford.

    Mid transformation: true (budget) track bars, used DA pedals, new tires, higher gearing, and a new headset to replace the finicky one that came with it.

    Current state: I took the advice of other Velominati and finally found a longer stem so I could set the bars at an appropriate reach to achieve la posizione.

  • @scotjonscot

    Nicely put.

    I'm in the middle of a build, frame-set in hand, wheels and saddle on the way, cockpit chosen. Bro-Set being debated.

    The hours of research, web site perusal, chats with other riders and mechanics will be missed when it's put together and on the road, but I suppose that's where the n+1 comes in.

    Exactly. Bro-Set is not as bad as they make it seem. Just don't fuck around with normal cables and get the Yokozunas straight away.

    @Gianni

    @frank

    @Gianni

    Frank, I met that Bianchi before I met you! How amazing is that? And what a good impression that bike made on me, once I lowered the saddle. This guy rules if this is his number 3 bike and he is loaning it out to a stranger.

    ...And then during our actual meeting at the pub after your ride, you promptly chastised me for having crap components on it and leaving it on the trainer all the time. I promptly started upgrading and riding it.

    Did I? Oh bless me.

    Oh, bless Hobbes.

  • @xyxax

    Calvin,

    I can't comment on the finer points of componentry, but that frame will always be my favorite among the legions here. Rosebud.

    Shit! You beat me to the joke!

  • @Barracuda

    One piece at a time

    - Baum Ristretto Ti

    - ENVE fork

    - 3T seat tube and stem

    - 3T bars

    - DA 9000 running gear

    - Lightweight Obermeyer wheels

    That outta do it ! Now, where did I leave my cash ?

    Johnny had the advantage of it being his last name.

    @zeitzmar

    Perfect example of how to progress along the path. Even if you are buying a built bike, take your time to adjust and adapt it. You are on the Path, Pedalwan. Strong work.

  • @brett FUCK YES!  That's it!!!

    Made my day right there, Mate!

    If this doesn't qualify for the non-existent V site theme video I do not know what does.

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