La Vie Velominatus: Optimism

Optimism carries us to the most rewarding tasks of our lives.

If I were a pessimist, or a realist for that matter, I wonder if I might have started any of the various activities which have brought me the most pleasure and satisfaction. Though I have Cycling in my mind when I make that statement, this principle expands beyond the vast and il-defined borders of La Vie Velominatus: everything worth doing takes time, work, and commitment in equal measure, and that fact can be daunting and intimidating.

Invariably, it is my poor estimation of effort combined with my vague memory of pain and discomfort which affords me the greatest character trait I possess: optimism. In the face of all reasonable likelihood of failure, in spite of the hopeless amount of work something might prove to be, I invariably believe that success is not only possible, but inevitable. (This trait might also be classified as arrogance or stupidity, but I don’t like the sounds of those as much because they would require more introspection, and that sounds like work.)

It is with this frame of mind that I cheerfully tackle most any activity, in my life and on the bicycle. While I haven’t conducted a poll of any kind, I have informally received sufficient unsolicited and often shouted feedback to allow me to surmise that this approach is not always as liberating for those participating in the activity as it is for me. Be that as it may, and as has oft been observed in these archives, our chosen sport is one rife with suffering afforded by long days in the saddle which allow us to suffer more intensely and for longer days in the saddle in the future. Every element of this sport revolves about axes of sacrifice, dedication, and patience. Training, certainly. Diet and weight loss as well. Even learning the subtleties of maintaining our equipment properly takes years in the tutelage of a Cycling Sensei. These are long journeys that build on small gains over time; there is no magic potion that one can imbibe to be transformed from portly oaf into elite cyclist – much less so a Velominatus.

If, on a winter morning, I had the slightest appreciation of the intensity of the cold I would feel eight or ten hours into the ride, I might never set out on it; it is my optimism that I will enjoy the ride that allows me to experience the insular nothingness of The Tunnel.

If, as I point my bicycle towards the hills instead of the plains, I had a clear memory of the suffering it caused me previously, I might never become a better climber; it is my optimism that I can overcome my size and weight to master the terrain I love the most and am comprehensively il-suited to travel.

If, at eight years old, I’d had the slightest idea that I would be almost 30 years into my journey and only just beginning to develop some of the most rudimentary elements of experience, strength, knowledge and passion that Cycling delivers to us, I would perhaps never had started. Yet it was my optimism that these things would come that has allowed me to experience this wonderful journey.

Optimism is what allows the mortal to start  down the path laid by the immortal. Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @ralph If he ate a body builder there shouldn't be too much to worry about. He'll do a Bertie, test positive and go down citing contaminated meat.

  • @ralph Wouldn't worry too much about the rule violations of the Cycling Shit Sandwiches (@frank that one deserves a Lexicon entry) given that it has inadvertently shown the way to true enlightenment.

    Competing against yourself is a good way to go about your cycling. As much as I like the idea of becoming faster and stronger than everybody else, I have know idea who the person I pass (or who passes me) on a ride is. They may only get to ride once a week or be finishing of a 160km epic. If I can say that I've enjoyed my ride and I've improved on the something from the last time I rode that route then I win.

  • @frank

    I use a natural sponge, and Baxter Aftershave. Guns are wicked smooth. I have a vague recollection of consuming a number of ales and then comparing the smoothness of my guns to the smoothness of @snowgeek's VMH's guns and concluding - after rubbing both - that mine were smoother.

    I wonder if that was entirely appropriate. Sorry @snowgeek. Might have crossed a line there.

    funny - i have a similar recollection...

    though, to be fair, we had just wrapped up 7 days of racing sailboats, so your guns had *better* be smoother...!

  • @ralph I'd wager there's more than a few more of us out there who are also guilty of the Cycling Shit Sandwich.  Hell, certain of my Strava "run" entries come suspiciously too close to my "ride" entries (and that's as close as I'll come to admitting it!) 

    Chapeau to you for being man enough to admit it outright.

    And I concur with @Chris--"Cycling Shit Sandwich" must be added to the Lexicon, post-haste.

  • @ralph

    next time someone asks you to go cycling, and bring your speedos too, decline - you should never have to cycle to get to your bike, nor run home afterward, that would be as stupid as having a moat around your garage

    Cycling Shit Sandwich +1

  • Running is bad for you - medical fact - all you are doing is pressing the FFWD button on your skeleton - swimming is excusable, as it is pleasant

  • @Dr C

    Running is bad for you - medical fact - all you are doing is pressing the FFWD button on your skeleton - swimming is excusable, as it can be pleasant

    this, yes.

    this, no.

  • @Dr C Actually, medically speaking, that's not true. Impact sports (running) do indeed change bone structure - but for the good. Remember "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger"? Well, it's true - as long as you don't break them, the repeated impact pounds your bones into a stronger structure. In fact, running is considered a recommended sport for those suffering from Osteoporosis. Swimming is terrible for those suffering from it, even though is generally a very safe and healthy activity (though pretty terrible if you're looking to lose weight!).

    Your skeleton easily holds up to the natural stresses of running. It's the joints (from wrong technique and heel-strike) and the ligaments (over-training) that are the weaker links in the chain - and even they are healthier once strenghened properly and trained.

  • @frank

    @SuperFed

    Optimism - it's what keeps me going to achieve shaving zen.  Been four months now as I observe Rule #33 and I just now purchased a luffa sponge and exfoliant to overcome the razor burn.  Thanks for the advice @mcaqueak.

    I use a natural sponge, and Baxter Aftershave. Guns are wicked smooth. I have a vague recollection of consuming a number of ales and then comparing the smoothness of my guns to the smoothness of @snowgeek's VMH's guns and concluding - after rubbing both - that mine were smoother.

    I wonder if that was entirely appropriate. Sorry @snowgeek. Might have crossed a line there.

    ?? That was me you drunk bastard. @snowgeek was hairier than @gaswepass. But as Rule 33 state, @snowgeek was able to bring the pain, so he gets a pass (I do keep digging at @gas tho).

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