Categories: Accessories and GearFolkloreNostalgia

On the Rivet

Pete Boydell shows us what Rule #5 looks like.

I’m proud to declare that I am fluent in three languages: Hyperbole, Dutch, and English. All of them rubbish. The language of the peloton is, by and large, the most beautiful and expressive in French and Italian, which already make anything sound sexy. But they really excel in le langage du peloton: Sur la plaque, La Volupte, Grinta, La Fringale – each of those smash their English translations with pure linguistic voluptuousness.

The exception is, of course, the term “on the rivet”. Don’t ask my why we all slide forward on our saddles when we’re riding hard, but we all do. Slip your saddle forward a bit to accommodate the forward position, and you’ll still slip forward once you start laying down The Five. It’s one of life’s great mysteries, alongside gravity and how the frosting got inside the twinkies.

Saddles used to have a rivet on the front, to hold the the crotch-numbing slab of leather in place because Cycling saddles at the time were modelled after Western horse saddles. And whenever you were well and truly on your limit, you’d have your rump precariously perched right over that brass nubbin. Hence the term, on the rivet.

To kindly demonstrate the point, no one does “On the Rivet” better than former Manchester DC legend, Pete Five Face Boydell. Even his saddle is having a shit.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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Wingnuts says:

Nov 16 2015 at 11:49 pm

Where do I start:

He's got a single chainring because he's in a time trial (run under RTTC rules) although some might say it's because he's on a Merlin frame which comes from Leeds which is in Yorkshire and we know that they don't spend money frivolously up there. He's got the handlebar stem and saddle almost level because thats what was the rule laid down by Ron Kitchen's catalogue and handbook! It's a tub (derivation - Tubular) not sew up!

Bet the photo was taken by Bernard Thompson! Guess who got out off bed the wrong side this morning?
Wingnuts says:

Nov 16 2015 at 11:58 pm

And note the stopwatch on the bars. This is a wonderful photo isn't it. I remember those Sunday mornings of pain before we discovered the right way - riding together hurting each other.
Oli says:

Nov 17 2015 at 12:17 am

@freddy

He's "testing", for sure. You can see his stopwatch on his handlebars.
RobSandy says:

Nov 17 2015 at 12:42 am

Love that photo. Don't think it needs any words.
RedRanger says:

Nov 17 2015 at 12:46 am

@Nate

Longest femurs known to man.

yeah, I hadn't noticed but now that you mention it.
RobSandy says:

Nov 17 2015 at 1:44 am

@freddy

…and this was before Strava, right?
Richo says:

Nov 17 2015 at 2:48 am

I think he's 'on the rivet' in an effort to lighten the front wheel so as those fucking forks do not just snap off.
gilly says:

Nov 17 2015 at 6:39 am

@RedRanger

Me too
wiscot says:

Nov 17 2015 at 7:01 am

@Wingnuts

Where do I start:

He’s got a single chainring because he’s in a time trial (run under RTTC rules) although some might say it’s because he’s on a Merlin frame which comes from Leeds which is in Yorkshire and we know that they don’t spend money frivolously up there. He’s got the handlebar stem and saddle almost level because thats what was the rule laid down by Ron Kitchen’s catalogue and handbook! It’s a tub (derivation – Tubular) not sew up!

Bet the photo was taken by Bernard Thompson! Guess who got out off bed the wrong side this morning?

Spot. On. You're a kindred spirit. Look at the brakes too. Likely the cheapest, flimsiest alloy brakes he could buy that would get him past the time-keeper and commissaire.

Those shorts are wool, with a crap chamois in them offing no padding/protection against the rivet that is burrowing into his crotch.

I don't know how far the TT is that he's riding - maybe a 10 or a 25 hence no bottle. I do know that if it's a 10 he'll be close to 20 minutes and if it's a 25 he'll be way under the hour. Cycling is way more pop[ular in the UK now than it was in the 70s and 80, but those were glory years for the TT scene.
RobSandy says:

Nov 17 2015 at 7:42 am

@wiscot

@Wingnuts

This post inspired me to google Bernard Thompson's photos - there are some gems. Made me feel nostalgic for the old UK TT scene even though I wasn't born. Anyway, my favourite photograph of the ones I've seen today is this beauty.