Categories: Belgian AffirmationsKeepers TourLa Vie VelominatusLook ProNostalgiaThe Hardmen

Something from Nothing

The weight of fatigue is taking its pound of flesh

If the only kind of wind they have in Belgium is a headwind, then the only kind of flats they have in Northern France are false. In Vlaanderen, they specialize in a delectable combination of the two. (Everything that isn’t a windy false flat, it appears, is a windy cobbled climb.)

The most obvious way to get your head kicked in on a bike is to point your bike down a road bespeckled with loads of climbing. It doesn’t matter what sorts of hills or mountains you’ve got at your disposal; the Commutative Property of Climbing states that big climbs and little climbs will jack you up equally so long as you do the same amount of climbing. But a long grind into the wind on a dead-straight false flat might be the most mentally agonizing kind of riding you will ever do.

The riding we do on Keepers Tour generally revolves around the iconic roads in the region, but to focus on those portions alone is like evaluating an individual’s life via their photo albums; some of the most amazing moments are experienced in the margins where no one is looking for them.

The rides we set upon were long days in the saddle, often leaving from the gite and requiring some time to arrive at the spectacle of cobbles or climbs; 20km to the Trouée l’Arenberg or 30km back from the Carrefour de l’Abre, for instance. For me, the rides back are what stand out the most; the group is weary but excited from having ridden some of the most amazing and difficult roads our Sport knows, and the late afternoon winds are blowing swiftly across the landscape. Talk is sparse as our legs are heavy with fatigue and we are each of us confronting the familiar barriers our minds and bodies lay before us at times such as these.

These moments when the body and mind want to give in but something intangible drives us on are my most cherished moments of Cycling in general and Keepers Tour in particular. These are moments when each rider is riding on the strength of those around them. The Laws of Physics tell us that it is impossible to make something from nothing, that the only energy we get out of the system is that which was fed into it.

The Laws of Physics obviously don’t apply to Cyclists.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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Optimiste says:

Apr 23 2015 at 10:11 am

@KogaLover

@Optimiste

Like your formula, why not make it V= #10^(n+1) (pronounce ten to the power of n plus one)

Much better. The maths were never my strong suit.
wiscot says:

Apr 23 2015 at 10:35 am

Love the lead picture. Looks like every morsel of food and conversation has gone and all that's left is solitary suffering.
Ccos says:

Apr 23 2015 at 1:23 pm

Its great how the for-shit conditions make for the epic rides, though that fact is little appreciated when in the midst of it.

And I'm sure no one was wearing those compression garment thingies later.
frank says:

Apr 23 2015 at 4:15 pm

@KogaLover

@Optimiste

Like your formula, why not make it V= #10^(n+1) (pronounce ten to the power of n plus one)

Assuming n here represents the number of riders in the group and #10 being Rule #10, wouldn't it be

V = (Rule VV)^(r+1)

I love this by the way.
frank says:

Apr 23 2015 at 4:18 pm

@wiscot

Love the lead picture. Looks like every morsel of food and conversation has gone and all that’s left is solitary suffering.

Possibly my favorite photo I've taken of a Cyclist. Over the shoulder while riding, no less.

Mickey's face says it all, and the gray skies set the mood. But @Rigid and @Harminator round it out perfectly; they are in opposite cadence and both obviously wrestling with their machines. The gap is there but they will claw it back, side by side.
frank says:

Apr 23 2015 at 4:21 pm

@Ccos

Its great how the for-shit conditions make for the epic rides, though that fact is little appreciated when in the midst of it.

And I’m sure no one was wearing those compression garment thingies later.

Yes, but one person was wearing toe cozies.
frank says:

Apr 23 2015 at 4:22 pm

@DeKerr

Something found in the margins of a book I read somewhere;

But they that wait upon [insert deity/inspirational noun] shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

But since I’m not that keen on the walking part;

“But they that meditate upon the V shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall face the wind, and not be weary; and they shall climb, and not faint.”

Vive La Vie Velominatus

This is absolutely spot on. Strong work, Pedalwan.
frank says:

Apr 23 2015 at 4:24 pm

@Chris

@frank the deep dull ache that’s been hiding in my legs since Sunday has been driving me harder on the bike this week. Not because I need to get back from some hallowed parcours but because I know that to give in to it would waste the effort I’ve put in already and that Friday’s rest day and diner out will be all that bit sweeter for it.

Off the bike, I’m better for it as well.

I love that feeling. My training was waaaaaay behind before KT and mostly every day of the trip was just good solid base training, sitting on the front in the wind and tapping out a tempo. That's what my legs felt like every afternoon, so good.
frank says:

Apr 23 2015 at 4:25 pm

@unversio

Frank, you finally made a Rush reference.

If I did, it was by accident. Fucking Rush.

@Erik

If I have learned anything from the lack of riding that I’ve done lately, or would it be the riding that I haven’t done lately, is that so long as I’m on the bike, things are good. When I’m not riding, I become an incorrigible human. So I will make the time to ride. The time to remember the rules. I don’t care what the weather is like.

Fixed your post.
unversio says:

Apr 23 2015 at 5:18 pm

@frank

@unversio

Frank, you finally made a Rush reference.

If I did, it was by accident. Fucking Rush.

And even better it was early Neil Peart, Rush -- 2112