There are two ways in life to be good at something. The first way is the most obvious, which is to actually be good at something. This is harder than it sounds because you need things like skills, talent, fortitude, and light sabers. The other way doesn’t require those things but it has its own challenges; basically, you have to be holistically awful at the sort of levels that make all the suck turn inside out on itself until it becomes awesome. American Flyers did that, and the fashion industry routinely uses this principle to their advantage, regurgitating fads and styles first as kitschy retro cool and then tricking us into thinking it actually looks good.
Cycling has happily been immune to this because our aesthetics were driven by function first through advances in technology; never in our history have we been so advanced that we felt the inclination to revert a step or two simply for the novelty of going backwards. The Velominatus may well be inclined to look to steel frames and three-cross box-section wheelsets for their durability and ride quality, but that is a luxury that we as amateurs enjoy without the demands of racing at the top level of our sport where events are won by fractions of percents gained through marginal advances in technology.
But apparently we’ve reached the stage now where Cycling style is being influenced by kids helmets and skateboard attire. I went for a ride with a good friend a few weeks back who was riding in Giro’s new baggy line of clothing. It flopped around like a sail in the wind generated by our own speed, and basically sent him backwards in the breeze that was blowing in along the coast. It looked good in the café before the ride, I have to admit, but last time I checked, Cycling clothing was supposed to be designed for Looking Fantastic while riding, not while sipping a doppio macchiato. (But let’s not understate the importance of looking good while sipping an espresso. We are not animals.)
And the helmets. There are accounts supported by doctored photographs floating around the internet of me wearing an ugly helmet, something I categorically deny ever happened. Nevertheless, let the record show that the lids the Pros are wearing these days are an abomination of style, culture, aesthetics, and progress. My Aeon is so light that I had to put on a few extra pounds just to make sure it doesn’t carry me off when I go outside. And guess what? It’s actually well-ventilated which means my sweet shades don’t fog up when I climb like the Evade makes them do. (Theoretically, of course. Because those photos are fakes.) And speaking of shades, I’m wearing a pair of Oakleys with photosensitive lenses that go from completely clear to black anodized depending on the light conditions. Also well-ventilated. That’s progress right there.
Riding a bike wearing an ice bucket on your head in baggy shorts and shirts with aviator sunglasses isn’t fashion forward, it’s Cycling – the most aesthetically independent sport in history – taking its cues from kids who think a long skateboard is an effective way to navigate through traffic. There may well be white space in the market for it, but that doesn’t mean it needs to be filled. We are the Velominati and we have standards, for Merckx’s sake.
Oh, and seriously, enough with the fucking beards. Rule #50, people. Sometimes you’ve just got to stand up and say we look like hell and I’m not gonna take it any more!
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@Minnesota Expat
Ditto on that nasty winter remark. It';s almost July and I'm just getting some respectable tan lines going here in Wisconsin. The poor buggers in MN had it worse than us!
Nice bike in the picture though, but I have my reservations on the white hoods.
It is somewhat gratifying to see that all cyclists are somewhat thoughtful and sensible. The cycle of Style article is an excellent example of this. The article should open our awareness to the problem of style and how it insidiously creeps into our lives. Recently in Philadelphia as part of the festivities of a major race, there were races of various age groups, however short, girls in one and boys in another. Neither group were yet to the level of racing, and were out there to show off there street stuff. When the bell rang, the girls shot off whizzing somewhat chaotically (I suppose you could call it holding a line however sinuous). The finish line was met with deliberate speed faces intent with strain. The boys race was from a functional and fashionable perspective an embarrassment. When the bell rang the boys too shot off, but not more than 10 m from the start it looked like all of them let out their drag chutes. The only problem was that there was another 990 m to go. I am not sure what sort of statement they were trying to make, but if it was a fashion one, I missed it. At the finish, the boys red faced and sweating could barely amble a centimeter beyond before they collapsed with exhaustion. The time? The girls blew away the boys by at least 20%! (I was embarrassed, because, while I would never admit it if it happened, I would have never let a girl beat me at anything.)
What was going on here? It is obvious to any cyclist that ever turned into a head wind. The girls either due to fashion (unlikely foresight) wore tight fitting shorts that clinged to their upper legs allowing them to slice through the air with ease. The boys apparently more concerned with fashion than speed, wore light weight shin length billowing pantaloons of the sort donned by members of the NBA. Did anyone see this coming? Are we now at an era where fashion trumps performance? Apparently so. Earlier this year at the famed Penn Relays, the grade school girls consistently our ran the boys by seconds in the 4x100 relay. Why? ... fashion.
I just had to get this one out. The article hit a nerve.
I am not tracking. And I'm having trouble keeping the Faustos (Fausti) sorted.
Passed someone today waring the new Giro lid, I have to say I think they got it right. low profile, vented, aero, minimal, I want one,
@anthony Definitely -- Giro Synthe "” aero panels "” eyewear docking port
@unversio
It looks better in reality than top of Taylor's head too. The cat I passed had the white one. Not usually a fan of white helmets, I am tiny and look funny in them, but it looked fantastic from my angle on the gent that I saw.
@unversio
@anthony
Interesting influence from automotive design, to my eyes:
@Bespoke Feels like the graphic design that I started in 2010. Granted I was aiming for a much more universal vent design.
copyright 2014 UNPULL
@unversio
Those ear pieces look a bit uncomfortable and not very aero.