Categories: KitNostalgiaReverence

When Kits Were Cool

The modern day Pro cyclist has many disadvantages stacked against them by comparison to their forefathers. They have to ride plastic bikes with little or no distinguishing character or discernible caché; they must willingly or perhaps unwittingly subject their body to an array of questionable “training techniques”; and they have to spend every waking hour poncing around in public wearing gaudily coloured outfits plastered with a myriad of logos, half of them (thankfully) not even readable. No one wants to be a the face of gastric reflux relief, no matter how glamourous it sounds.

How they must wish they were born long ago, in a simpler time, when bikes were made by artisans, not robots, and they were shiny and classy, much like the automobiles of the same era. When the only substances they need ingest came from a decanter, and they could enjoy a quiet smoke along with their tipple. And they certainly long to be able to wear a long trenchcoat and Aviators on the way to the podium, or a crisp single-breasted suit with a smart Trilby, perfect attire for lounging after winning a Classic, or attending a Gentleman’s Club, rather than wrapped in nylon and dipped head to toe in fluoro paint and topped off with something more commonly seen at Yankee Stadium.

Just look at these pillars of style. They never had to fear the beginning of the season, when their DS would toss them a few plastic bags and tell them “this is what we wear this year.” They knew exactly what they were getting; solid colours, no fancy fonts, the main sponsor easily read in bold lettering, and black fucking shorts. There was no apprehension when moving to a new team about what hue of pink or aqua or yellow they would be subjected to. They knew hey were going to Look Fantastic.

Unless, of course, they’d signed for Atala.

[dmalbum path=”/velominati.com/content/Photo Galleries/brettok@velominati.com/old kit/”/]

Brett

Don't blame me

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View Comments

wilburrox says:

Sep 2 2014 at 10:53 am

>>> and black fucking shorts
wiscot says:

Sep 2 2014 at 11:09 am

@Al__S

It does have too many logos, but the Loto-Belisol kit this year at least seems to have been designed by someone rather than a committee. Takes quite a strong person to tell the lead sponsor that you're writing their name in block lettering, not using their expensive corporate logo.

Spot on. The Lotto Belisol kit is ace - and stylistically a bit of a throwback too. Proof that team kits used to be better.
Gianni says:

Sep 2 2014 at 12:47 pm

@wiscot

Thank Merckx I can depend on @wiscot to jump into the fray when necessary.

@Owen

I think you've got it exactly backwards. Mapei was a slick kit, because it took real men to dress in something that looked like it came from a clown's fever dream.

A clown's fever dream. +1 for that. Genius.
wiscot says:

Sep 2 2014 at 12:54 pm

@Nate

@wiscot

@Owen

I think you've got it exactly backwards. Mapei was a slick kit, because it took real men to dress in something that looked like it came from a clown's fever dream.

I have it exactly right. Mapei was crap, Atala was sweet. I wouldn't go around telling Urs that he wasn't a real man because he wore one of the best kits ever.

Urs transcended his kit. That fucker would have made Castorama look good.

Making the Castorama kit look good? That's asking a lot of any man, even a stud like Urs. Even Fignon couldn't really pull it off and he even made having a ponytail seem kinda cool.
Owen says:

Sep 2 2014 at 2:06 pm

Just found this as an ad over on Inner Ring. Best of both worlds?

http://www.prendas.co.uk/cycle-clothing/jerseys/retro.html?p=1
brett says:

Sep 2 2014 at 3:11 pm

@poepie

@Mikael Liddy "vleeseter" is a bad translation of "cannibal". "vleeseter" means "meat eater"

No good for me then!
brett says:

Sep 2 2014 at 3:12 pm

@Gianni

@wiscot

Thank Merckx I can depend on @wiscot to jump into the fray when necessary.

@Owen

I think you've got it exactly backwards. Mapei was a slick kit, because it took real men to dress in something that looked like it came from a clown's fever dream.

A clown's fever dream. +1 for that. Genius.

Indeed. +1 to that man.
Ccos says:

Sep 2 2014 at 4:39 pm

@wilburrox

>>> and black fucking shorts < << 10-4 to that ! And shoes too !

Black is just a flat out good color when it comes to cycling. Shorts, shoes, kits,bikes... I like black. I even like black Jags with bikes on top of them. Black works. Even works well on plastic bikes... and though probably not a lot of fans of this one, I happen to really dig it, cheers all:

Black shorts and shoes are great, but otherwise all black is verging just to the right of fucking boring. Our team had a hideous kit several years ago of orange and grey with black bits here and there. Though fugly, it was easy to spot teammates in the peloton. We now sport something akin to Sky minus the asymmetry and Darth Vader vibe. Off the bike it looks great, but in the field we have no clue who anybody is because so many other teams have similar kits. "Do we have someone in the break?" "Beats the shit out of me, I'm not wearing my glasses." The pro field now has taken a similar path to the mean of black, blue and boring. The bikes too. Give us some color (like Lotto: damn fine one there) And not that neon shit of Tinkoff.

Oh and not to be a hippocrit, but ton Velo is fantastic.
ChrissyOne says:

Sep 2 2014 at 8:28 pm
ChrissyOne says:

Sep 2 2014 at 8:30 pm

Maybe the next bike will be black.