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Descents are Not for Recovery. Recovery Ales are for Recovery.

Ivan Basso rips it up on the way down.

My trouble isn’t with being a good descender; it is with cornering and stopping – and sometimes both. Or, as G’rilla puts it, “Descending is like sex; how good I am at it has nothing to do with how much I enjoy it.”

Descending is demanding and requires great skill. It is not a time for resting or taking it easy; getting down the mountain should be every bit as hard as getting up it. Merckx was himself a good climber, but his bikes were all designed to be stable and fast on the descents so he would be able to get off the mountain faster than the mountain goats he was chasing.

On the way down, we are compelled to smoothly spin the pedals at 120 or more rpms in pursuit of maximum speed. Once escape velocity is reached, we contort our bodies into the most aero tuck possible, causing our muscles to scream out in agony from the unnatural position. Cornering, we push on the pedals and bars in an effort to maximize friction between tire and pavement as an alternative to finding too much friction in the ditches at the roadside. The mind is consumed in the total concentration of keeping the rickshaw in one piece.

We hereby hand down Rule #93, plucked from the ether by @urbanwhitetrash in a moment of clair-V-ance after the VVhidbey Island Cogal.

Rule #93 // Descents are not for recovery. Recovery Ales are for Recovery.

Descents are meant to be as hard and demanding as – and much more dangerous than – the climbs. Climb hard, descend to close a gap or open one. Descents should hurt, not be a time for recovery. Recovery is designated only for the pub and for shit-talking.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

Siri says:

Oct 9 2013 at 3:29 pm

@frank I didn't find anything for pissed taking. Do you want me to search the web for you?
Chris says:

Oct 9 2013 at 3:36 pm

Descending? Did someone say GIF?

@wiscot This.
Chris says:

Oct 9 2013 at 3:41 pm

@Chris

Descending? Did someone say GIF?

@wiscot This.

The Colombian's team mate told him that today's podium would be made from three enormous piles of cocaine.
Optimiste says:

Oct 9 2013 at 4:00 pm

This is what I love about The Rules. Concise and compelling.

However, I am not...so I elaborate. As I see them, The Rules do not restrict action. They expand understanding, focus action and elevate performance. It's hard to go hard downhill. It's easy to be lulled into a false sense of accomplishment. Rule #93 reveals yet another opportunity to serve up ample helpings of Rule #5 and demoralize ones opponents. In doing so, the eventual recovery is that much sweeter.
biggles says:

Oct 9 2013 at 4:11 pm

I used to be a good batshit descender until I got stupid this summer.
The story is so stupid it might get me banned from the site so I shall not tell it here, suffice to say I went full retard.
Xponti says:

Oct 9 2013 at 4:12 pm

@Optimiste That's Simon Clarke from Greenedge doing that decent, and it was because someone said there were pies on offer a the end and he didn't want to miss out.....
Optimiste says:

Oct 9 2013 at 4:17 pm

@Xponti

@Optimiste That's Simon Clarke from Greenedge doing that decent, and it was because someone said there were pies on offer a the end and he didn't want to miss out.....

Sweet recovery indeed.
frank says:

Oct 9 2013 at 4:17 pm

@Gianni

Nothing like descending with better descenders to understand why you suck. Do you go into blind corners without touching the brakes? I just can't do that and I lose a little on each one. Getting aero and not touching the brakes into corners can open up big gaps on those with active imaginations.

@eightzero

The V-locus of descending is quite different. Descending is all about survival. Gonna be killed on a bike on a mountain? Yeah, it's gonna be on a descent. It all just happens so much...well...faster. My heart rate really doesn't drop much on a descent only because they scare the living shit out of me. It's a little fucked up that I relax MORE on the climbs.

That these two posts came in succession is one of the happiest coincidences ever.

@8-0, if you lowered your bars a foot, you'd be much more confident on the descents. You might also be broken, but you'd be more confident.
frank says:

Oct 9 2013 at 4:19 pm

@Haldy

@Frank- are the extra pages at the back of The Rules..specifically to write the new Rules in as they come along? I don't feel like I have the authority to add to the tome without express Keeper permission!

No, they're for writing down your sins.

The US release of the book will include any new Rules divined between the UK edition and when we go to press. So far that's only two, but nevertheless.
eightzero says:

Oct 9 2013 at 4:24 pm

@frank

@Gianni

Nothing like descending with better descenders to understand why you suck. Do you go into blind corners without touching the brakes? I just can't do that and I lose a little on each one. Getting aero and not touching the brakes into corners can open up big gaps on those with active imaginations.

@eightzero

The V-locus of descending is quite different. Descending is all about survival. Gonna be killed on a bike on a mountain? Yeah, it's gonna be on a descent. It all just happens so much...well...faster. My heart rate really doesn't drop much on a descent only because they scare the living shit out of me. It's a little fucked up that I relax MORE on the climbs.

That these two posts came in succession is one of the happiest coincidences ever.

@8-0, if you lowered your bars a foot, you'd be much more confident on the descents. You might also be broken, but you'd be more confident.

I'm am nervously considering reversing my stem, and moving the two spacers on top of it under it. I've done the math and this drops my bar about 2cm. That's about the same as a "foot" right? In any case that's way too much. Change is good. You go first.

I have remembered from my ol' "This is how to recover a winged spacecraft from orbit to a runway in 25 easy mach numbers" days that all I need to do to slow down on a descent is just sit up a bit. Hdot, Hddot etc etc. Brakes? "Touch your brakes and you go from 5th place to 55th place in a blink of an eye! Suitcase of courage, pedal of anger..."