Encore de la Pluie

The Lion roars in the mud and rain

I don’t enjoy the races in February on the Arabian Peninsula because I like watching other people ride in the sun while I spend my afternoons looking for a sliver of daylight that coincides with some fragment of my day where I don’t also need to work or engage in some other activity. I also don’t enjoy them because I think corners are overrated, nor because I like watching stock-bike time trials, nor because I believe wind is a suitable substitute for mountains.

No, I enjoy the February races on the Arabian Peninsula because it’s the first sign of life we get from the hardmen who will be bending, breaking, and smashing their way over the cobblestones this Spring in snow, rain, or suffocating dust.

Not a bad way to start things, Tomeke.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

Geoffrey Grosenbach says:

Feb 8 2011 at 4:46 pm

I can guarantee you that Museeuw did not mix up the big ring and the little ring.

Can we have a thread for monstrosities like this, Frank?
Steampunk says:

Feb 8 2011 at 6:36 pm

@Buck Rogers
True dat.
frank says:

Feb 8 2011 at 6:36 pm

@Geoffrey Grosenbach
Ha! Nice catch. We've long been planning a section devoted to douchey Rule-breakages, but are concerned we might disappear up our own asses doing that.

That said, there's a hipster downtown who rides a fixie with the crankset on the wrong side. Classic. I have a pic of it somewhere.
frank says:

Feb 8 2011 at 6:43 pm

@Buck Rogers

I completely agree with you on not ever really liking Museeuw. Not sure why but he never appealed to me as a rider. Definitely was a Hardman in the Spring but just not very likable in my opinion.

Badass, fucking hard as hell, fucking cool, and Boonen's mentor. The FUCKING LION OF FLANDERS. What's not to like? Dude smashed his knee on a cobblestone and STILL looked cool.

Here's him big-ringing the Kapelmuur. Any questions?

http://www.velominati.com/racing/study-of-a-hardman-johan-museeuw/
Brett says:

Feb 8 2011 at 8:08 pm

@frank
As BingRingRiding said, "You don't get the nickname 'Lion' from riding a fucking compact". Word.
michael says:

Feb 8 2011 at 8:18 pm

There's a perfectly good explanation for the swapped rings on that photo that isn't showing. It's about chain alignment and the complete inaccessibility of the proper chain ring bolts and or bb spindle length.
Nate says:

Feb 8 2011 at 8:51 pm

Where did @Geoffrey's photo go?

@michael, if you are explaining, it's because you've already dug yourself a nice hole to get out of.
frank says:

Feb 8 2011 at 8:58 pm

@Nate
They are back. Wordpress 3.0.5 has a bug that effects rippin' awesome sites like ours that allow uploads and embeds. It's fixed now.
Nate says:

Feb 8 2011 at 9:09 pm

@frank
Got it now. Hope I didn't cause needless panic amongst our rippin' awesome site admins -- was worried it was my stupid work computer that had the issue.
George says:

Feb 9 2011 at 1:13 am

@frank
Re. "That said, there's a hipster downtown who rides a fixie with the crankset on the wrong side. Classic. I have a pic of it somewhere."
I imagine he might have done that because he's left handed and fed up with getting oil all over the leg of what you'd call his pants when dismounted. I might try the same myself at some point, although I prefer having a freewheel to a fixie.