Update: You can watch the live stream (assuming it works from the velodrome) on the Velominati channel at USTREAM. When you log in, you’ll first see my little test video of my puppy eating grass. Please disregard me yelling at it. That never happened.
I have always considered myself to have a good imagination, something I attribute half to my genetics, half to my upbringing, and half to Lego. Despite this supposed creativity of mine, I am utterly incapable of conceiving how much I will suffer on Festum Prophetae. It might be that I’m too much of an optimist, but more likely is the explanation my darling VMH gives: I’m an idiot.
An example that comes to mind prominently would be my trilogy of efforts up Haleakala. I too easily forget the suffering, despite the videos and photos that speak quite plainly on the subject. And that actually happened. I experienced it. Still, the pain fades quickly and right now I feel like having another go.
I also rode a one kilometer Pursuit on the track in Gent on Keepers Tour (twice). Just the kind of good, non-competitive fun that lets you go so hard you suffer minor convulsions afterwards. Granted, a one-kilometer effort is about the worst event you can imagine for an old diesel like me, who doesn’t start heaping coals on the fire until I’ve been in the saddle for a good number of hours. Two minutes nearly killed me, so I should try doing the same thing for three orders of magnitude longer. (Pedant alert: The times were well under two minutes but that makes the math much more complicated and the suffering no less significant.)
The Hour Record has fascinated me more than any other event. I read about the records set by Coppi, Merckx, and Moser, but missed experiencing them in real time (Steep Hill.tv didn’t exist yet, and also I wasn’t alive for two of those.) I was, however, lucky enough to live through the Hour Record’s Golden Age in the 90’s when the widespread use of EPO and the wholesale negligence of the UCI meant frame builders were at liberty to design whatever speedy abomination they wished, and riders were willing to saddle up and lay the hammer down ad infinitum. Lets see who’s blood vessels pop first!
The doping is exaggerated; Boardman might have been clean and was probably just stupid. Obree was definitely clean and certainly stupid. Indurain was definitely doped, definitely not stupid. Rominger was dirty as a Wall Street Mortgage Broker, and a semi-genius. The game was afoot, and back and forth they went: New record! Record falls…New record! Record falls…It was fantastic. In my memory, I was much more enamored with the Hour than I was with the Tour.
I had the ambition to honor last year’s Festum with an Hour Ride (I won’t call it a Record), but factors outside my control (last minute panic to organize time on a track after leaving it too late) conspired against the effort. This year, I planned ahead a bit more.
In honor of what I consider to be the standard-setting Hour Record by The Prophet on what amounted to little more than standard track equipment at the time – not to mention, without the aid of genetics-altering drugs – I will be flogging my guts out for 60 minutes on the Alpenrose Track at 3pm on Saturday, June 15. Mark at Veloforma will be loaning me a Pista Pro for the ride, seeing as I have no track bike (or experience to speak of).
Anyone who wishes to come see a tall fat guy ride a bike badly for 60 minutes is welcome to come down and watch. I understand @scaler911 will be documenting the event. There is even a rumored appearance of my VMH who is a bit of a Snuffleupagus around these parts. If she attends, I will have her fill the role of Ole Ritter’s wife in The Impossible Hour and step forward for every lap I’m ahead of schedule and step backward for every lap that I’m behind schedule. She’s a strong woman not accustomed to walking backwards, but I’m sure she’ll do fine.
Merry Festum Prophetae, one and all. Vive la Vie Velominatus.
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View Comments
@piwakawaka
No SHIT?!?! Jezhus, how'd you get Tom Platz to do your time keeping, anyways.
And may I never have the honour of helping with a VSP again! You Keepers do more behind the scenes than I ever could have guessed. May I be banished to permanent VSP running Hell if I ever bitch again about a late VSP event!!!
Bike too small? Looks pretty short in the tt. Dunno if you'd want or need a 60 cm track bike, but perhaps a 200mm stem would get you in the right spot.
Congratulations on the ride, I missed the streaming bit cos I was out riding but it looked great. The thing with track is you always want to see how much harder you can go....
Wow...turns out Frank is just over three quarters Merckx! Perhaps an official t-shirt to commemorate the event?
Great work Frank! Where can I see the replay feed?
@Rob
Yeah, I reckon he actually rode an extra 1.8ish extra kms from riding ON THE RED LINE.
@minion
This.
Also, well done Frank. That's a special thing to suffer through an hour like that. Looking forward to see your attempt next week, I mean year.
@Rob get out there with a meter stick, like Oskar Egg in that anecdote in The Rider.
Wow. What a day/ night. So I had to keep the swearing to a minimum since just at the top of the track, and near the end, there were a lot of kids around. Alpenrose is a dairy and "family fun time" place.
Of course, it's been decided, that like Haleakala, this was a test run. He had too much left at the end and was smiling right after. A lot was learned by everyone, and it'll be better next year. He may or may not mention this, but his 4K time was super impressive (the actual "trackies" hanging around were pretty stunned how he was going given the circumstances, and they compared Frank to a 2 time Olympic Track cyclist who's name I can't remember now).
Fucking great time, before, during and after the event. It was an honor to be involved. Some photos (you can figure out what was going on I'm sure):
[dmalbum: path="/velominati.com/wp-content/uploads/readers/scaler911/2013.06.16.13.53.41/1/"/]
(for the record, that's not nearly all the beer that was consumed, earlier in the evening, the empties actually made it to the recycling bin. AND, you know its been a good night when you go outside in the morning to find $8K worth of camera gear and 3 MacBook Pros just sitting outside in the driveway. The bikes did get locked in the shop, so I suppose out priorities are straight)
@scaler911
From the pictures it appears Frank didn't have a computer display on the bike, but used a Powertap wheel.
It might have helped to achieve a more measured pace, despite any Rule #72 misgivings.
@ChrisO
Ultimately I don't think he did the ride on the Power Tap wheel. Switched out at the last minute to one with a different rear cog (a 14t in case you wondered). But I think that next time, even with his reluctance to use a Garmin, it'll be easier for him to keep track of his own pace. Even though we were yelling out lap times, and knew what time that had to be to get to the 40K goal, he couldn't really hear us. I'm sure when he gets home (he and G'rilla just left, mighty hung over) he'll fill y'all in more with his thoughts.
Frank did not need a garmin or a power tap, he just went on the V Meter, that and a feller yelling lap times too of course. Well done big man, bon effort.