Categories: Racing

Grillin’ Up a T-Bone on the Fourth of July

W is for Wouter. Photo: Fotoreporter Sirotti

In the US on the Fourth of July, we drink shit beer and grill loads of meat to celebrate our declaration of Independence from England. I think that’s supposed to be ironic, us being lazy and getting fat on this day, because my understanding of the Delcaration of Independence is that it said something to the effect of, “You guys are lazy and fat and suck. And we hate tea and taxes. That’s two more reasons than we need to be rid of you.” Personally, I like both the English and tea, but nobody asked me so here we are.

I’ve never made it a secret that I’m not a fan of Vaughters’ “sit in” tactics and, by association have soured on Gramin-Cervelo in general this year. But I have to admit, I’m coming back around to the boys after their stellar efforts in the opening stages of the Tour. In contrast to their Rule #67-violating standard-operating procedure, today they wrested control of the bunch away from a dominating HTC-Highroad train, chucked a Maillot-Juane into a leadout so strong it looked more like a breakaway than a bunch sprint, and delivered T-Bone to the line first on the Fourth of July.

I haven’t done the research to back this up, partly because I’m certain someone will correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe this represents the first American Tour stage win on this particular date. To top it off, we had an emotional win dedicated to Farrar’s fallen friend, Wouter Weylandt.

America, fuck yeah.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

Oli says:

Jul 8 2011 at 1:42 am

All this rampant xenophobia is getting a bit weird and boring now isn't it?
Aidas says:

Jul 8 2011 at 1:53 am

@frank

@ChrisO

@Marcus and FrankJust to be totally clear and pedantic the UK and GB are not the same thing.Officially it is The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.Great Britain was formed after the union of England and Wales with Scotland.Later they formed the United Kingdom by a further union with Ireland, as it then was, now Northern Ireland only.I think technically by referring to England you also include the Welsh, as Wales is part of the Kingdom of England.

Spectacular work. I loves me a good History lesson, especially one that justifies for me my confusion on the subject.
One of the most beautiful things about Europe is how small all the countries are and how fiercely nationalistic their peoples are. It's a beautiful thing.

Actually, Wales is not included into England (especially these days). The Welsh, like the English, are a distinct national identity, with a seperate language, cultural and historical tradition. True, Wales was occupied by the Crown, but not exterminated or assimilated into England. These days, Cymru (Wales) has devolved self-government. Welsh is spoken as a first language by more than a quarter of the population. They are not English.
Jonny says:

Jul 8 2011 at 1:59 am

@Marcus
Your question aroused my curiosity so I have conducted some research. I can confirm that GB does indeed put forward candidates for this competition. And further (for Dr C) so does Ireland. I won't post photos for fear of incurring the wrath of Merckx (or at least frank) but I'm sure you'll be able to validate my findings.

Now I'm off for hill repeats and an ice bath.
Marcus says:

Jul 8 2011 at 2:41 am

I just found out that a young bloke from my local footy club goes out with Scherri-Lee - ergo Australian Rules wins
Dr C says:

Jul 8 2011 at 2:56 am

@ChrisO
Gaelic games thing is a very traditional parish based exercise, where players always play for their town and county, with no transfers etc - steeped in history and tradition, and not necessarily crossing the...ahemm.. boundaries some chose to lay down

Rugby, when it is going well, and we have a champagne team at the moment (by Northern Hemisphere standards anyway), transcends all that social stuff, and football is an English/ Scottish thing, so Rugby is the prime Irish product at the moment, apart from Rory McIlroy, and I believe the volleyball team who are in the quarter final of some big competition somewhere

Otherwise most our superstars seem to be (well, in the North anyway) alcoholic lunatics with their finger always within touching distance of the big red self destruct button, and best allowed to fade into the past

@Oli
maybe best thought of as exploratory international dialogue
Chris says:

Jul 8 2011 at 3:08 am

@Dr C

On the Scottish front, while fitba is undoubtedly the king os sports, there are more cricket clubs per head of population in Scotland than any other part of the UK and more Scots play cricket than Rugby.
Dr C says:

Jul 8 2011 at 3:21 am

@Chris
get out of here - I would have sworn chucking telegraph poles around was the main thing up thonder
Chris says:

Jul 8 2011 at 3:36 am

@Dr C

Seriously dude... it's a real grass roots thing, loads of village clubs, especially in places like Fife, and after work leagues. If you know The Meadows in Edinburgh, there'll be three of four games going on there every week day evening in the summer.

Stick throwing is a strictly highland thing along with Shinty.
Chris says:

Jul 8 2011 at 7:23 am

An hour or so to the last shuttle launch. Only the Americans managed that.
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