Photo: Janet Hill

As a dyed-in-the-wool Northerner, my time living in the South was a mixed bag. Southerners think differently, speak differently, eat differently, and prioritize life differently than do Yankees. In many ways, I became a better person during my time in the South, learning to relax a little bit and stop chasing my tail over everything all the time. In fact, the new and relaxed Frank was probably better prepared for the mellow attitude towards living that I’ve found so delightful here in the Pacific Northwest. (Believe it or not, PNW Frank of today is less-uptight than previous iterations.)

On the other hand, trying to get something moving faster than it was already moving was a near-impossible task and one that caused my impatient self frustration at times. I also learned that while the North has long since moved on from the trials and tribulations of the Civil War (er, the War of Northern Aggression), parts the South has not. In fact, any conversation with an elderly Southern Gentleman would invariably lead to the assertion that the South would rise again, to which my query was ignorant as always: “Again?”

My sense of nationalism is a wonderfully flexible thing. I was raised in the States in a Dutch household by Dutch parents speaking Dutch as my first language. I was, however, born in Saint Paul, Minnesota, about a score after Johnny Cash accidentally met a heartbreaker there. On any typical day, I self-identify as a Dutchman, despite my passport being inarguably American after having been born within the borders of the United States. But whenever the good ol’ US of Fuckin’ A pulls one out of the bag, my allegiances happily flop over and I’m suddenly a proud American. Its very convenient, always being on the winning side this way.

Seeing the turnout at the Cyclocross World Championships was one of those times. Everything fell in place; the crowds, the racing, and the weather going full-blown Cyclocross by throwing ice, snow, mud, and rain at the racers. American Katie Compton even brought home a Silver medal. (Oh, and by the way, the Dutch won 3 out of 4 events, so put that in your pipe, Belgium.)

This was already enough to restore my faith in American Cycling, but it wasn’t until the Elite Men’s Award Ceremony that I was nearly brought to prideful tears. There isn’t any population that has a healthier disdain for authority than do Americans, and I can’t think of any group of Americans with a healthier disdain for fat white corrupt assholes than Southerners. Given the current state of affairs, I tip my hat to the great work done by Louisville, Kentucky in organizing the event, the throngs who showed up and proved that Cycling can be successful in America, and booing Pat McQuaid like he has always deserved.

I’m not sure if the South will rise again, but I’m mighty proud at how we pulled this one up from the ashes. Chapeau, ‘Murca.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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  • Lets be honest, the Dutch and Belgians could care less about disc vs cantis.  They could pull the tail of a rattle snack causing it to bite down on the brake track, and still end up on the podium.

  • Great reports, youse who were there.  But @Ron, gin, really?  In Kentucky?  Shoulda been bourbon!

  • I had plans to drive 3.5 hours from Columbus, Ohio, on Sunday to catch the races, then drive back. Really made no sense, but I was going to do it. Even found a guy with free VIP passes in a tent with food and beer. Then the schedule changed, couldn't make it Saturday. Oh well. I stayed warmer watching it on the computer. I am stoked to race 'cross this fall, though. Bought a cheap Raleigh Furley single speed.

    And, not for nothing, it's "dyed in the wool", as in the dye is ingrained in the material. Sorry

  • @Cheaves

    nothing like a healthy dose of "boooo"

    Indeed- away from cycling, but one of the more amusing moments of the Paralympics last year was during the Athletics, when the UK Chancellor of the Exchequer got to find out exactly how unpopular he was- at a veritable festival of inclusiveness and positivity he had the best part of 80,000 people booing his presence- nay, his very existence.

  • Weather was shit, kind of nice, then shit, then kind of nice, then shit for the elite men - so basically it was fucking perfect cyclocross weather.  It was great to meet Ron and his VMH and chat for a bit.  I wish we could have met up with all you other guys.

    Some quick observations as sadly I have a lot of work to catch up on at the office:

    1. Belgian fans I spoke to were overwhelmingly supportive of the event here in the US and excited that CX was growing in this country.  Of course they realised the turnout was going to be no where near the 60,000+ at last years event, but were surprised and how supportive the fans were of all the riders, not just the Americans (which is what they expected)

    2. Vos is fucking ridiculous.  There is seriously no comparison between her level right now and that of Katie Compton.  She was so far ahead the stewards were allowing full blown course crossings by throngs of people in between the two riders. It was great that Katie took 2nd and won the World Cup this year, but Vos is from another planet - Planet V.

    3.  The cyclocross equivalent of the V Locus is simply putting your head down between the bars, ignoring the fact that any exists in front of you and burying yourself on the flat, straight, paved sections.  From the Juniors up through the elite men, I've never seen anything look more pro.

    4.  Apart from Trebon, these guys are so tiny its ridiculous.  Trebon's seatpost however looks the length of my entire seattube and I'm only 3" shorter than him.  I'm amazed he can handle a bike as well as he does.

    5.  The only disc brakes I saw were on bikes ridden by the Americans.  Cantis didn't seem to give anybody very many problems.

    6.  Ridley must be thrilled at the course announcer proclaiming the bike's brand over and over when commenting on Pauwels chain issues.  That said, its about the third or fourth time this season he's had a mechanical issue that's completely taken him out of the race.  Sunweb can't be thrilled with either their mechanics or their bad luck.

    7.  Good call on moving all the racing to Saturday.  Riders would have needed scuba gear in the wooded section had the race schedule remained as originally planned.

    8. Nys really needs to be seated at the right hand of the Merckx.  He is just plain awesome.

    9. Sportcrafters had the absolute coolest product on show at their tent.  Its a prototype of mini-rollers (say 6" or so) with built in resistance (like their current roller offerings) attached to a folding fork stand.  Folded up, this was maybe the size of a car tire jack, but could easily replace a full fluid trainer or full set of rollers for warmups at races or even training at home.

    10. I should have brought my DSLR and some autofocus lenses.  Still Here are a few photos.  I took a lot more but haven't had time to go through all of them yet:

    The man himself

    Tim Johnson finished as the top American in the elite mens race

    J-Pow had a rough day

    So did Gabby Day

    The new Giro helmets are fugly no matter who is wearing them

    Even the Belgian U23s know how to do casually deliberate

    Who says light blue isn't a bad ass colour?

    Putting the 'V' in Vos

    The weather was perfect for the mens finale

  • @Ron

    I didn't even bother, just nipped the gin I had in my pocket.

    Ah ha!  Now I understand why you weren't toting beers!  Nice work!  I had some whiskey back in the hotel room, but figured I wouldn't be able to smuggle it in.  As it turns out, I could probably have brought in a film crew and rolled a keg in with me and no one would have cared.

  • Velo - Nice shots! And great analysis. Aaaah, sorry for not sharing. I guess I was so overwhelmed by everything I forgot, but very unVelominati like to not help a Follower out. I'll have to get ya back next time we meet!

    They had some demo Moots on display with Shimano stems & seat pillars. I had never seen the pillars...which sport a V right at the front, so when you are really dying and hang your head so low you can see between your legs, you see a V!! Nice compliment to the stem V.

  • Yeah, I know I was in bourbon country but as I ride a Gin & Trombones I decided to go with gin, thought it might help me fully get in the spirit.

    Yep, they had signs up "no outside food or drinks" and then when I saw people carrying in sippy cups of pussy drinks and even dogs I realized they weren't really enforcing things. Might have very easily rolled in a keg, or two.

  • @Ron Goodness - I thought only flapper molls from 20s drank neat gin? Careful, you might get depressed.

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