Categories: Reverence

Reverence: Helmet Vents

Eye wear-compatibible helmet vents: perhaps one of the greatest bicycle breakthroughs

Helmets became mandatory in professional road racing in 2003, following the tragic death of Andei Kivilev from head injuries sustained in a fall during Paris-Nice.  With the adoption of that regulation died one of the most iconic images of professional cycling: the racer riding over the high mountain passes of Europe with their eyewear perched atop their bare skulls, cycling cap, or leather hairnet.  That image may have died, but with the regulation came a massive push for innovation and improvement in helmet technology.

Prior to 2003, cycling helmet design took its inspiration largely from bowling ball technology; early racing helmets were spherical, heavy, and poorly ventilated.  As a result, helmet adoption amongst professionals was spotty. When helmet use became mandatory, however, the pros insisted on lighter, better-ventilated designs – not to mention an improvement in aesthetics. (Which begs the question: are helmets today cooler because the pros wear them, or do the pros wear them because they are cooler?)

In addition to those problems came the question of what to do with eyewear; tucking unused eyewear into a jersey pocket is unpopular with sponsors who pay to have their products on display during a race, while placing them rearwards on the back of your head makes you look like you’ve suffered an accident at the hands of some kind of mad scientist.  The solution was to design a helmet with large side vents capable of receiving the earpieces of eyewear in order to store them safely on the helmet while not worn over the eyes.

I have discussed in perhaps too much detail my obsession with cycling eyewear and my tendency towards claustrophobia set on by the feeling of overheating while having something on my face during physical effort. I suppose I have the option not to wear a helmet in training, but it could be argued that those who deem not to wear one perhaps have very little worth protecting in terms of the functional quality of their brains.  For someone of my considerable intellectual capability, I would be doing the world – if not civilization at the evolutionary scale – a disservice by suffering a brain injury brought on by smacking my unhelmeted (and oddly proportioned) melon against the pavement.

With that, I feel justified in declaring eyewear-compatible helmet vents one of the greatest advances in bicycle technology.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • You're all missing the genius of the photo that accompanies the article. Artistic purity. The composition, the subject matter. The black & white puts it over the top. Ansel Adams is smiling down on you Frank. Chapeau.

  • @Good Geofelephant
    Agreed. I climb like a mollusc, but tend to keep the eyewear on. Always.

    Greetings from Norway, by the way. In Trondheim for a few short days (sans shoes and pedals, sniff), but may go looking to rent a bike if time allows...

  • @frankWell, I guess a new helmet is going to have to be on the agenda. The high price I pay for upholding Velominati style standards...

  • @CyclopsIndeed, I smiled when I saw the photo. Especially the gents in the background with the beer. Frank seems to be quite the photographer in general (assuming he did those artsy shots of the 3M electrical tape and the Baxter's)

  • @Cyclops, @KitCarson
    You lads are too kind.

    @Marcus

    Thank Merckx atop Sweet Mount Velomis for the internet. It's been too long since I've gazed upon that lid.

    @Jarvis

    In fact, what really annoys me are riders who only have glasses stuck in their helmet vents and never seem to actually wear them. If you don't like glasses, don't fucking have them, it will make them cheaper for those of us who have to pay for them.

    I'm glad you're getting enough sleep these days, because christ I've missed that kind of input.

  • @Cyclops
    I actually took that shot at the Tour de Blast this year. It was a good day. Those local dudes were hooking us up with free peebers. There was a joyous cross-cultural exchange there that day.

  • @Joe

    I had observed the Grand Faboo's repeated reliance on the 'phantom TT bar' whilst grinding the rest of the field into a paté of mixed and broken DNA....you know the elbows / forearms resting on the bar tape either side of the stem with hands lolling lazily in the breeze?

    Sweet jesus that is some nice writing there Joe. Into a pate of mixed and broken DNA...

    I'm not flexible enough to do that for more than 10 seconds but it looks cool as hell.

    @KitCarson
    I have a LAS Squalo and it's too hot and barely holds glasses, it now sits on a shelf and I'm back to a Giro Pneumo, old, you bet, glasses go upside-down in from the back. It's a two handed, sit upright install but it's great.

    Does everyone know Giro will send you replacement sweat pads for your Giro helmet? Free, nada, nuthin'. That is nice of them.

    @frank
    Ludo was a factory worker, painting trucks and training and racing on the side. That's a hardman, working full-time and training enough to scrabble above the semi-pros of Belgium.

  • @john
    the fact that Ludo could rise out of the semi-pros, while building semi-trailers (see what I did there?) is surely testimony to the benefits of doping. But bless his sole, he was hard as nails

    @frank
    nowhere near enough sleep (it's 4.40am here and they've been awake for the last hour), it was just the correct subject matter.

  • @john
    Not only was Ludo a flahute, he was also an unnecessarily honest (and possibly quite stupied) one.

    His team kicked him off the Tour after he told dope testers (after winning a stage no less) that he had taken a drug which might mean he might test positive (but he had a prescription for it so that's ok). Team wasn't aware of this drug, so they kick him out and then he tests, wait for it:

    NEGATIVE...

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