Update: On Monday, July 18th, this product has been demoted from Reverence status due to imprecise machining of the 3mm and 4mm allen wrenches. Please see the updated Reverence article for it’s worthy successor.
My apologies to anyone who has purchased this product based on this article. I am truly sorry.
Yours in Cycling,
Frank
—
In our pursuit of La Vie Velominatus, we embark on a sacred quest – the pursuit of Rule Holism. The path is strewn with apparent contradiction; these contradictions are in fact but tests laid out for us – oportunities to discover The Way and strengthen our resolve. Little by little, we find our way along the path.
Those of us who amputate our saddlebags in compliance with Rule #29, are immediately faced with the unavoidable realization that our tools are unwieldy, heavy, and bulky. Indeed, our reliance on the European Posterior Man Satchel has disconnected us from their contents and has bred complacency when it comes to tool selection. So long as the tool fits in the satchel, it goes in the satchel. Spoke wrenches, multi-tool with superfluous attachments, chain tools, zip ties, scissors, even the odd Crescent wrench has been known to find its way into the tool kit. For a Velominatus’ machine, which is kept in perfect working order at all times, these tools serve little function other than to make you climb less well for your weight.
Removing the dependence on a saddlebag demands that we become more discerning in the tools we carry with us. The tools that are to reside in our pockets must be as carefully selected for their function as our machines and our kit itself. Simple. Reliable. Lightweight. These tools will be called into action rarely, but when called upon, it will be at a time of greatest need. They must not fail.
Over the years, the tools that accompany me on my rides have reduced in number and weight, and we have developed a bond during the many hours we have spent together – me perched on my saddle, them tucked neatly in my pockets. I started with two Park tools, one with huge range of hex keys, and a second with a fewer (redundant) number of keys, but including the vital Phillips and flat-head screwdrivers. Eventually, I started leaving the multitool without the screwdrivers in the toolbox, and taking my chances with too few hex tools. The risk felt too great, so I switched to other tools with varying degrees of success, but each failed in one aspect or another – corrosion, weight, poor construction – and was added to ever-increasing pile of discarded tools.
The problem was further complicated when I switched to the Campy 10sp Skeleton Brakes with Torx T25 bolts. I cursed a blue-streak when, as I was mounting my new brakes with great anticipation, I realized I was to be stopped dead in my tracks as I didn’t have the proper Torx tool. I suppose, as Saul pointed out, I should be glad it was a standard Torx size and not some proprietary size that requires a $100 tool, but that knowledge did little to temper my rage. I purchased a set and returned home knowing full well that now my quest for the perfect minitool included a T25 to make emergency brake adjustments. More tools were chucked to the Island of Misfit Tools.
Almost without noticing, with the appearance of the Pro Minitool 11 in my stocking on Christmas morning my quest came to an end. The nickel-plated steel tools don’t rust, the alloy body is solid, the tool is thin and light enough not to cause any sag or discomfort in the jersey. Beautifully made, the tool folds smoothly and the 8mm hex snaps off to reveal a 6mm hex below it. Unlike most tools that attempt this feat, this one pulls it off with the addition of a ball lock. All the tools are cut precisely and cleanly cut, making it a pleasure to work with. Amazing.
It feels so good in the hand, it’s tempting not to carry it around and fiddle with it all day. But I don’t. Not anymore. Starting tomorrow.
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View Comments
@Cyclops
I have that knife too - it causes quite a commotion when I have it in my trouser front pocket.
Frank, nice riff on the tools of the trade but for me that puppy is designed to get lost. So I avoid snazzy wonderful little items like that and expensive eye wear too. I don't know about you all but most of my jerseys have three pockets and a spoke wrench one or two allen's, now CO2, a spare tube and we're good to go. No bags, boxes never have.
I always bring my cleat covers with me, in my jersey pocket, and use them about half the time. I use Speedplay so I don't want them to get all gunked up. Also, if for some god-forsaken reason I have such a bad mechanical I have to walk any distance, having the covers would be nice...
Cleat covers. Yeah, I know some folks who carry them. They claim speedplays are very sensitive to getting banged up. Not sure, as I've never ridden them. I use Look pedals and some of my cleats are a few years old, work just fine. I own cleat covers but have used them only a few times. Never carry them on road rides.
Rob - pretty funny. Be careful with that knife in your pocket! You might make a bunch of new friends 'round town...
Marko - We have similar likes! Yeah, I LOVE my Lezyne pumps. They are awesome. Nice enough looking I almost don't even mind having a frame pump. I have one silver, one black. The hose is genius. And yep, like the CB tool a lot as well. Yeah, do I need a chain tool? Probably not, but for a few grams I decided to go for the 17 tool...tool. (I've only ever buggered my chain badly once on a road ride and no chain tool was going to help me. Worst shift of my life, ripped my RD off. Shitdamnit.)
@mcsqueak
I was going to admit to cleat covers but I was too scared. You have led the way and I am following.
Cleat covers were abhorrent to me until I had to take to my speedplay cleats with a fucking hacksaw after I had worn out the screws by walking on the cleats. I think it is a real design flaw (or was it intended) that the expensive part of the pedal system wears very quickly with only a modicum of walking. But they are still the best pedals I have ever used.
Ok boys who wants a fight over rival pedal systems?
@Marcus
I'm always happy to be the first to lead others down the righteous path to salvation.
Somehow I always wind up living in houses and apartments with stairs, so I have to travel up/down those at the start/end of each ride, and using the cleat covers makes it much more stable to walk and "portage" the bike.
Also, if it's been raining there is muck all over the ground it keeps 'em clean.
Funny you should mention having to take yours off with a hacksaw, but I could see that happening. I unclip my left foot 99.9% of the time when stopping, so that cleat is wearing out much faster than the other one. I'll probably need new ones by the time the summer is out. But I do love them... they feel freakin' fantastic to ride with.
Can't fight you, Marcus. I'd love to try speedplays. I'm actually just scared I'd like them and have to change pedals on all my bikes & cleats on all my shoes. I think after a few years I've finally gotten the pedals/cleats set up just right on all the buggers.
Well, OK, if we're going to admit to cleat covers I may as well throw this bomb, too: why don't roadies just admit that MTB shoes are more sensible (precisly because they permit walking without either shoe covers or cleat damage) and demand that manufacturers make road pedals and shoes which use SPD or egg beater systems? I find it hard to believe that it is only possible to get what we need (good pedal contact, rigidity, light weight, acceptable float, etc) from systems which require you to walk like a duck on crack.
I have Shimano pedals spd pedals on my around town/rain/bad weather bike. Yeah, walking in mtn. shoes is a dream in comparison to road shoes. So nice to be able to bike to meet friends out and not clackity-clack around. And my favorite part is that my mtn. shoes are NOS Shimano shoes that I picked up for $0.99.
Pulling booties over mtn shoes in really cold, wet weather sucks though.
Oh, just checked bonktown, by the way...Keen spd sandals are on sale...better get ready for spring riding, lads!
@Marcus
As I've only ever used Look & currently on the Keo's, what are the Speedplay's like? By that I mean ease of entry/exit, hot spot's, cleaning, removal, cleat wear etc?
I've always been curious but afraid or unable to ask...most of the bloke's I see riding them are usually leaving my fat arse behind so I never get a chance