Update: On Monday, July 18th, this product has been demoted from Reverence status due to imprecise machining of the 3mm and 4mm allen wrenches. Please see the updated Reverence article for it’s worthy successor.
My apologies to anyone who has purchased this product based on this article. I am truly sorry.
Yours in Cycling,
Frank
—
In our pursuit of La Vie Velominatus, we embark on a sacred quest – the pursuit of Rule Holism. The path is strewn with apparent contradiction; these contradictions are in fact but tests laid out for us – oportunities to discover The Way and strengthen our resolve. Little by little, we find our way along the path.
Those of us who amputate our saddlebags in compliance with Rule #29, are immediately faced with the unavoidable realization that our tools are unwieldy, heavy, and bulky. Indeed, our reliance on the European Posterior Man Satchel has disconnected us from their contents and has bred complacency when it comes to tool selection. So long as the tool fits in the satchel, it goes in the satchel. Spoke wrenches, multi-tool with superfluous attachments, chain tools, zip ties, scissors, even the odd Crescent wrench has been known to find its way into the tool kit. For a Velominatus’ machine, which is kept in perfect working order at all times, these tools serve little function other than to make you climb less well for your weight.
Removing the dependence on a saddlebag demands that we become more discerning in the tools we carry with us. The tools that are to reside in our pockets must be as carefully selected for their function as our machines and our kit itself. Simple. Reliable. Lightweight. These tools will be called into action rarely, but when called upon, it will be at a time of greatest need. They must not fail.
Over the years, the tools that accompany me on my rides have reduced in number and weight, and we have developed a bond during the many hours we have spent together – me perched on my saddle, them tucked neatly in my pockets. I started with two Park tools, one with huge range of hex keys, and a second with a fewer (redundant) number of keys, but including the vital Phillips and flat-head screwdrivers. Eventually, I started leaving the multitool without the screwdrivers in the toolbox, and taking my chances with too few hex tools. The risk felt too great, so I switched to other tools with varying degrees of success, but each failed in one aspect or another – corrosion, weight, poor construction – and was added to ever-increasing pile of discarded tools.
The problem was further complicated when I switched to the Campy 10sp Skeleton Brakes with Torx T25 bolts. I cursed a blue-streak when, as I was mounting my new brakes with great anticipation, I realized I was to be stopped dead in my tracks as I didn’t have the proper Torx tool. I suppose, as Saul pointed out, I should be glad it was a standard Torx size and not some proprietary size that requires a $100 tool, but that knowledge did little to temper my rage. I purchased a set and returned home knowing full well that now my quest for the perfect minitool included a T25 to make emergency brake adjustments. More tools were chucked to the Island of Misfit Tools.
Almost without noticing, with the appearance of the Pro Minitool 11 in my stocking on Christmas morning my quest came to an end. The nickel-plated steel tools don’t rust, the alloy body is solid, the tool is thin and light enough not to cause any sag or discomfort in the jersey. Beautifully made, the tool folds smoothly and the 8mm hex snaps off to reveal a 6mm hex below it. Unlike most tools that attempt this feat, this one pulls it off with the addition of a ball lock. All the tools are cut precisely and cleanly cut, making it a pleasure to work with. Amazing.
It feels so good in the hand, it’s tempting not to carry it around and fiddle with it all day. But I don’t. Not anymore. Starting tomorrow.
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View Comments
@frank
Well with the time difference it hasn't happened yet! Still a couple of hours to go. I'm a little nervous, can't decide what to wear.
Heretic! Apostate!
@all
See Rule 34
I'm as agnostic on cleat covers as I am on pumps vs. CO2. I have Speedplays, I don't use covers, and I DON'T WALK AROUND IN CYCLING SHOES! If you have to go upstairs, take em off if you're concerned about wear.
PS I don't meet friends for lunch wearing smelly kit, either. It's 15 minutes extra to get home, 10 minutes to shower and put on clean clothes, 5 minutes to get somewhere close for lunch. Anyone who wants to have lunch with me after a ride (or vice versa) will need to wait a half hour. That's how I roll. Coffee in smelly kit with clubmates is A-OK.
@frank
So you weren't there this morning Miss Medio? Well that is distressing news indeed. I turned up at Cafe Racer at dawn this morning. In fact, not just me, I also brought along Thelma as she is a lot tougher than me.
Since we didn't know what you looked like, we listened to various convos amongst cyclists until we heard some hipster fixie guy crapping on about the environment. Naturally enough, we thought that was you. Thelma had armed herself with a front wheel (Ambrosio rim, 32 spokes double butted for extra weight and toughness) and went at the hipster fixie guy like a spider monkey. It was over quickly but it wasn't pretty.
Guess we have an apology to make somewhere...
Self-sufficiency is the name of the game.
I don't ride with a team car. I don't ride with a race radio. I usually don't ride with anyone else at all.
I ride with the V.
When I break down, I fix myself up and keep going.
@Marcus
I thought you proposed 11? Oop's, I'm wrong again.
Great topic. I have been trying to figure out how best to use my pockets in the back. I think its time to lose the saddle bag.
@sgt
well unless:
i) you only track strand at traffic lights; and
ii) you have mastered the art of levitation;
at some stage you will walk on your cleats.
If you do any riding other than a "standard" training ride from your front door and back (if this is all the riding you do, take a long hard look at yourself - and what are you training for anyway?), you will necessarily walk on your cleats, be it at the coffee shop, race registration, race lineup, etc.
So sooner or later, your speedplay cleats will wear out - more likely on your "dismount" side to a greater extent. Cleat covers go some way to preventing that.
having never actually needed to use a mini tool in the 10 I have owned a bike, is the Pro 6 or 11 better?
Well yeah, I never meet up with non-cycling friends for food while in kit, that is gross. I also limit myself to sitting outside if I'm stopping for a coffee post-ride, to keep an eye on the bikes and to be courteous to non-riders enjoying themselves in a pit smell and sweat-free environment.
Ok. Let's review Old School tools. In the Dark Ages, some carried a Silca frame pump under the top tube (no room on the seat tube as we all had two water bottle cages--hot as shit in Texas for about half the year). Others, including me, stuck the Silca up-side-down on the left side of the rear triangle. The Campy pump head fit nicely at the top of the rear triangle. If riding sew-ups, a spare tire was folded and secured under the back of the saddle with an old Alfredo Binda toe strap. If riding clinchers, I carried one tube, a small patch kit, tire irons, and a boot (a cut piece of old bike tire in case of a side blowout), all in an old cycling sock, and secured the sock under the saddle with the same Binda strap I mentioned earlier. Pockets were reserved for a cap, food, driver's license, and cash. There was no such thing as a cell phone.
These days, I carry two cartridges instead of a pump, but otherwise, no difference in terms of what tools I use. If something on the bike has been troublesome, I might carry a Park Tool allen key set which is about the same size as a cartridge. The tools go in an old cycling sock in the middle pocket instead of under the saddle as I can't find any worn out Binda straps amongst what's left of my cycling crap. But if I find a strap, the shit's going under the saddle. A sock and a Binda strap DO NOT count as a European Posterior Man Satchel.
I don't walk in my cycling shoes, so no cleat covers--BTW I use Look Keo's. (Seriously, do you think I would use any other brand on my new LOOK 595?)
Oh, and a friend of mine gave me a FREE PAIR OF BRAND NEW YELLOW PRINCESSES this past weekend!!!!! I damn sure ain't walkin' in them shoes--EVER. I actually haven't put cleats on them yet, so they probably won't debut until next week.
Seriously, we aren't Boy Scouts. We're Velominati. If your chain breaks, if a spoke goes haywire, if your crank comes loose, or if your mangina doesn't have that fresh feeling, just call someone. We all have cell phones these days. Somebody will eventually come get you.