Look Pro, Part II: Casually Deliberate

Louison Bobet rests calmly on his top tube before a race.

Looking Pro is a delicate art rife with paradox and enigma. Aesthetics in a sport as difficult as cycling is itself a contradiction; surely anything wrought with such suffering should be driven by function and function alone. Yet cyclists are both some of the hardest people in sport and the most vain. For a cyclist knows better than perhaps any other athlete that Morale is a fickle beast that lives upon a knife’s edge; it can drive us on to incredible heights yet squash us at will like an insect for little more than spotting grime on a freshly laundered jersey or dirt on the bar tape. In order for us to ride well, we must have good Morale.  In order to have good Morale, we must look Fantastic.

The argument could be made that the best way to improve your riding is to meditate extensively on Rule #5; some might even suggest that aesthetics dilute it’s purity. On the surface, that may be a seductive thing to believe, but it ignores the single most important fact of cycling: looking Fantastic is the best anesthetic available. Just imagine how you looked there, standing on the pedals, dishing out The V. I was magnificent and didn’t feel a thing; I looked Pro.

Along with the vital The Three Point System, mastering the art of being Casually Deliberate is one of the key principles to Looking Pro. A professional gives the impression of having been born on their bicycle; they are one with their machine. When riding, their Magnificent Stroke exudes grace and power. Movements on the bicycle are deliberate yet effortless. Standing, sitting, climbing, cornering – rider and machine form a cohesive union.

Even when not riding, the Professional exudes an air of calm. Sitting across the top tube, the rider rests easy, precisely familiar with the movements of their loyal machine, trusting in the motion and balance. The bicycle is as familiar and connected to the rider as the very air they breathe.

In your quest to master the art of the Casually Deliberate, keep these pointers in mind:

  1. A pre-ride espresso is the perfect casually deliberate means to prepare for a ride. Fully kitted up, loyal machine leaning patiently against a nearby wall, cycling cap carefully disheveled atop the head, sunnies perched above the brim.
  2. Never look like you’re too eager to get on with the ride or the race. After all, the ride is a daily companion and while it is cherished, you are tranquillo in the knowledge that the ride will start soon enough. This is the genesis of Rule #80; energy is to be saved for the right moment and is not to be wasted on pointless things like standing under your own strength.
  3. Once the ride begins, the first twenty minutes are to be taken at a luxuriously slow pace. A rider is confident in their powers and never too anxious to show their hand too early. When riding with others, this is the time to ride two abreast, chatting about simpler times.
  4. Light conversation is to be taken up casually near the top of the first several climbs of the day. If not at the top, at least during the more difficult bits. As the other riders in the group begin to feel the pressure in their legs and Doubt begins its steady march into the bit of the morale where they do their worst damage, a casually deliberate comment which show no signs whatsoever of labored breathing can do much to hurry that march along.
  5. Never show how much you’re suffering. Ever. Even when inhaling a wasp, the effort that shows on your face is less than you are truly suffering. Unless, of course, it is the finale, and all thought has vacated the mind in the solemn journey into the void. Only then is it acceptable to cease being casually deliberate.
frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @Jeff in PetroMetro
    We're in a similar boat. The horse my VMH "bought for me" is a mellow, kind, smart brown quarter who's name says it all, Buddy. He's been good for me to learn on as he teaches me everything I need to know. The other two are a 17 1/2 year old Arab mare dressage queen who's pretty long in the tooth but still moves as pretty as anything and a 3 1/2 year old Swedish Warm-blood named Gino who's bigger than a moose and a total punk. Gino's problem is he needs a job and now that he's old enough to have one he'll get sold off for some proper training by someone with the time. His older half-brother Grecco is a great warm-blood with all the buttons that she sold. He's competing regularly again and supposedly racking up points. Cool horses, those dressage ponies. The VMH is getting out of competitive riding and wants something with a few tricks but is still a good trail horse, like your quarter.

  • @Ron
    No shit about the expense. Bikes are waaaaayyyy cheaper whether they're carbon, steel, or unobtainium. Bikes don't eat.

    Me, I like to ride my bike more than I like to ride a horse. I like the physical effort. Riding horses lacks the aerobic/anaerobic output that makes me feel so much better when I'm done. Riding horses is much more cerebral. It's all about communicating with a herd animal that doesn't want to be eaten.

  • @Jeff in PetroMetro
    You can't have too much float with Time pedals. They put you in your natural position.

  • @frank
    yeah. That's '92 as Yate's is in the National Champs jersey, so they'll be the Equipe version 3.

    Just wanted to check when he was National Champion so I looked it up on Wikipedia, and I found this:

    For a rouleur Yates climbed very well for his weight.

  • @Jarvis
    Holy Mother of Hinault, that's some serious turnout for a natural position. If the bike racing thing hadn't worked out for Yates, he could have been a ballet dancer.

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