Look Pro, Part II: Casually Deliberate

Louison Bobet rests calmly on his top tube before a race.

Looking Pro is a delicate art rife with paradox and enigma. Aesthetics in a sport as difficult as cycling is itself a contradiction; surely anything wrought with such suffering should be driven by function and function alone. Yet cyclists are both some of the hardest people in sport and the most vain. For a cyclist knows better than perhaps any other athlete that Morale is a fickle beast that lives upon a knife’s edge; it can drive us on to incredible heights yet squash us at will like an insect for little more than spotting grime on a freshly laundered jersey or dirt on the bar tape. In order for us to ride well, we must have good Morale.  In order to have good Morale, we must look Fantastic.

The argument could be made that the best way to improve your riding is to meditate extensively on Rule #5; some might even suggest that aesthetics dilute it’s purity. On the surface, that may be a seductive thing to believe, but it ignores the single most important fact of cycling: looking Fantastic is the best anesthetic available. Just imagine how you looked there, standing on the pedals, dishing out The V. I was magnificent and didn’t feel a thing; I looked Pro.

Along with the vital The Three Point System, mastering the art of being Casually Deliberate is one of the key principles to Looking Pro. A professional gives the impression of having been born on their bicycle; they are one with their machine. When riding, their Magnificent Stroke exudes grace and power. Movements on the bicycle are deliberate yet effortless. Standing, sitting, climbing, cornering – rider and machine form a cohesive union.

Even when not riding, the Professional exudes an air of calm. Sitting across the top tube, the rider rests easy, precisely familiar with the movements of their loyal machine, trusting in the motion and balance. The bicycle is as familiar and connected to the rider as the very air they breathe.

In your quest to master the art of the Casually Deliberate, keep these pointers in mind:

  1. A pre-ride espresso is the perfect casually deliberate means to prepare for a ride. Fully kitted up, loyal machine leaning patiently against a nearby wall, cycling cap carefully disheveled atop the head, sunnies perched above the brim.
  2. Never look like you’re too eager to get on with the ride or the race. After all, the ride is a daily companion and while it is cherished, you are tranquillo in the knowledge that the ride will start soon enough. This is the genesis of Rule #80; energy is to be saved for the right moment and is not to be wasted on pointless things like standing under your own strength.
  3. Once the ride begins, the first twenty minutes are to be taken at a luxuriously slow pace. A rider is confident in their powers and never too anxious to show their hand too early. When riding with others, this is the time to ride two abreast, chatting about simpler times.
  4. Light conversation is to be taken up casually near the top of the first several climbs of the day. If not at the top, at least during the more difficult bits. As the other riders in the group begin to feel the pressure in their legs and Doubt begins its steady march into the bit of the morale where they do their worst damage, a casually deliberate comment which show no signs whatsoever of labored breathing can do much to hurry that march along.
  5. Never show how much you’re suffering. Ever. Even when inhaling a wasp, the effort that shows on your face is less than you are truly suffering. Unless, of course, it is the finale, and all thought has vacated the mind in the solemn journey into the void. Only then is it acceptable to cease being casually deliberate.
frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • Jeff in PetroMetro :
    @frank Right. My contribution was just a humorous diversion. Back to the work at hand.
    Merckx, what is up with Yate's left foot in the above picture? That can't be his cleat position. His heel is in his spokes. A little too much float with the old Time pedals?

    Man, I was thinking the EXACT same thing when I saw that picture. Got to love the float in Time pedals!

  • Marko :
    Is this a case of "when I was young we walked to school, up hill, both ways" or a sign of the coming extinction of the hardman?
    http://www.cyclingnews.com/news/riis-says-many-young-riders-are-too-spoiled

    Just read that piece an hour ago. Yeah, I'm sure that Coppi, Binda, Merckx, Kelly et al would probably have laughed at how "easy" Riis had it!

    Seems to me that there is some veiled reference to Contador in their to me, even though the article says that no one was specifically targeted by his comments.

  • @ZachOlson
    Another rule, here: sunglasses should never EVER be held in your mouth. These studs can't pull it off and you're not them.

  • OK, indulge me for a moment. I know that I'm a soon to be 50, slightly overweight Cat 5 but I eat, sleep, and breathe all things road racing. I love the thought that somebody with brains can beat somebody that is stronger than them. I like that I can lay the V on guys 15-20 years my junior. I love the concept of a team working together to deliver somebody to the podium and would be a willing domestique if the opportunity arose. The problem is that I live in southeast Idaho. Not a hotbed for road racing. I've been banging my head against a wall for the past couple of years trying to get the concept of team tactics and the like across to some of the guys in our local cycling club but it falls on deaf ears. Last year, however, a Cat 3 moved into town and he "gets it".

    As we've recently started shaking off winter around here and meeting for some group rides a Cat 2 and a Cat 4 who had just both moved to town have been showing up too. Two weeks ago we had an actual "training ride". The Cat 3 had the 10 or so of us whipped into a double pace line and I spent the next 2.5 hours tempoing along in wannabe europro arrogant roadie prick nirvana. Then last night it was cold and windy and the only ones to show up for the ride were the the aforementioned three racers and me. Everybody looked "pro". Proper cold weather gear. No mis-matched kits. No European man satchels. It was sweet. After over an hour of echeloning in the crosswind we made the turn for home and it happened. A real high speed rotating pace line. With the nice little tailwind our "four man break" bombed along for kilometers on end at 45-50 kph. Even though I was on the ragged edge I was happier than a Frenchman in a yellow jersey.

    Man, I love road bikes.

  • @Cyclops

    Good stuff. Getting a club ride organized into anything resembling a paceline is like herding fucking cats... there are a few of us who constantly try to organize our Saturday club ride, usually to no avail. Occasionally we can get a break working, but it takes commitment from everyone to pull through, plus a feel for the paceline to make sure no one gets popped. When it works, it's alchemy.

    And a four man rotation downwind at 50 kph? Money.

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