There are lots of things to like about Vroomie Froomie, like his willingness to accept the fact that people are inclined to question his performances. Aside from me resenting him for leading a Tour which everyday becomes a little less exciting, he seems quite a likable guy; he is polite, respectful of the sport, wears team-issue…
The Archives
Rule #12 is a beautiful thing. If all but a handful of Rules had to go, Rule #12 would remain. This Rule smolders in all cyclist’s hearts; the need for a better bike has to be there. It just has to. Rule #12 cannot be extinguished while working in the most dangerous or depressing bike-free…
I’m not too proud to admit to having multiple phobias against various things. That’s phobia multiplicity. Having a phobia against something is very simliar to having a normal phobia, except that in addition to being irrationally scared of something, you also harbor a stifling grudge against it. Also possibly irrationally. For example, I have been diagnosed with…
How can we not talk about the Tour? After Sunday’s stage it’s hard not to be a little excited. Until yesterday the most thrilling thing I had seen was Mark Cavendish’s mad man chase back to the peloton after a late-in-the-race crash. He needed to get back quickly as the race was hurtling toward a…
There are many paths to learning lessons, many of which have their merits. Reading a book, for instance, is a popular way of learning something. Or having a teacher or mentor describe to you why things are the way they are or aren’t the way they aren’t. Then there is my favorite method, that of…
André had spent the last ten years working underground, yet he had only just turned 24. His face, skin hardened and cracked from a cocktail of sweat, coal dust and intense labour, gave him the appearance of a man decades older. He had grown up quickly, but had aged even more rapidly in the physical…
Three things can send me from a deep sleep to sitting bolt upright in bed, gasping in terror. First is the most obvious, which is any dream involving visions of spiders. Second is dreaming of being dragged off or otherwise being aware of impending doom and opening my mouth to scream but having no sound…
@wiscot reminds us, things have not always been this way. He is a historian of the sport and it’s always useful to be reminded of how the Tour de France arrived to the here and now. The Tour used to be the last grand tour of the season; a way for some to get fit…
What does Selle SMP have in common with the lead up to the 2013 Tour de France? Absolutely nothing, seeing as possibly no riders are on them in the Tour. It’s a long three weeks of Tour ahead, let’s think about our own asses for a brief moment. As a disclaimer: this is not a…
Any return from time off the bike is always met with a peculiar mixture of anticipation and apprehension. I will be excited to return to the bike, but on some level I’ve become accustomed to not getting on my bike every day. Not riding is easy, and we are creatures of inertia – once the rhythm of the…
June 20th, 2013, to paraphrase FDR; a date that shall live in infamy. The Queen is in deep seclusion. Today is Scepter’s official release date for The Rules. Yes, despite people already sneaking it out of England’s bookstores, today really is the day. And as part of the EU, hopefully the book is available across the…
The Theory of Special Relativity states that time for a moving object passes more quickly than for a stationary object. Einstein, in deriving this theory, demonstrated great insight and creative power for which he is considered perhaps the greatest mind in human history. If he had owned a set of rollers, however, he’d be considered a…
This photo is perhaps the greatest of all time; it shows The Prophet riding in the 1969 Ronde van Vlaanderen, kit and machine perfect. Rule #9 conditions in abundance. He’s gone off the front with some 80km left to race, which predictably sent his directeur into a rage. Ordered to return to the bunch, Merckx calmly suggested…
This week’s Guest Article comes from our friend, @blacktoolpower (l) and our editor Drummond Moir (r). In anticipation of our book’s imminent release, these two donned their lab coats and headed out to the streets of London to assess the state of Rule Compliance in the city’s commuter crowd. Always remember: leave this kind of…
La Vie Velominatus isn’t a part-time gig. La Vie means the life, and The V is my life. Otherwise, I’d be Some V Velominatus, some of the time. Even when I’m not riding my bike, like the last two weeks (for reasons which don’t really matter, and offering them only renders them excuses), I live…
I find it interesting to observe the chasm between parties engaged in a conversation, particularly in response to questions being asked. I’m thinking, at present, of the question, “How many bikes do you have?” My feelings in response are nothing short of complex and maybe a bit confused; reservation that I feel I should have a…
It’s not a secret around these parts that William Fotheringham is my favorite Cycling journalist. Growing up as a budding Velominatus in the isolated island known as North America, I could count on one hand the publications that even mentioned Cycling, let alone provided reliable coverage. Winning Magazine and Velonews were my source for race…
Update: You can watch the live stream (assuming it works from the velodrome) on the Velominati channel at USTREAM. When you log in, you’ll first see my little test video of my puppy eating grass. Please disregard me yelling at it. That never happened. I have always considered myself to have a good imagination, something…
Every once in a while, you stumble across a quote that changes your outlook on how you approach life. Of course, this requires that one does a good deal of “reading”, which is a problem for me, as reading anything that isn’t Cycling-related feels the same as doing “work”. I do the odd bit of…
Addiction is typically defined as a bad thing. Addiction to drugs, to alcohol, sex or even work is usually portrayed as a condition to be battled, to overcome. The same sources may recommend a strict regime of regular exercise and healthy living as the perfect antidote to the bad addictions that befall an overwhelming majority of…